The joys of being a mom... Funny things our kids say...

hellomommas · November 2015

Make a mental note to do this for your kids! My mom kept a journal for my brothers and I of all the funny things we said as little kids... Now we are in our late twenties/thirties but we sit around reading them during holidays and laugh hysterically. It is so much fun and such a wonderful keepsake.

I was reminded of this lately as my 3 year old has been so funny lately.

1. "Momma! What are you doin sitting on the potty! Stand up and pee out of your penis!"

2. We told him the story of Jonah being in the big fishes belly... And I asked him later that day what we should name the baby. "JONAH! Because he is in YOUR belly!!!"

Pretty creative! Let's hear about what your kiddos have been saying!

matthewsdm · November 2015

Oh my gosh, this is never ending in my house. My 3 year old should be recorded at all times:

1. Yesterday I hear her say to her sister (who's 2) "I'm going to tell mom, you're not being a very good role model!"

2. Earlier this year for mother's day, they had to fill out a paper that said "i love my mom because...". I got mine back and it said "I love my mom because, she watches tv."

KayDray15 · November 2015

Once when we were driving, a guy on his phone cut us off and almost hit us. My son, then about 3, threw his hands in the air and yelled "Mommy! That guy is driving like a Trash Bag!"

MillerMama13 · November 2015

This is such a good idea. Whenever my 2.5 yr old says something cute/funny I text it to my mom. She always tells me I need to write it down.

Yesterday DD was being super whiny and It was almost lunchtime so I asked her if she wanted some lunch. She said "NO mommy! I can't want lunch! I can't want it!" I asked why and she said "Cuz I'm still crying..."

CopperLane · November 2015

I'm a FTM and can't wait to have a LO saying silly things all the time!!!

I love these!!!!

TwoBadMice · November 2015

My 2 year old son told me this morning that "Mommas have toes." He is also obsessed with asking if we have to poop "Daddy you have to poop, Momma you poop?"

goldie987 · November 2015

So not one of my kids but my grandma reminds me of my snark even as a young child all the time. She was taking me to the park to feed the ducks and we drove past a fire truck with a Dalmation on it. Trying to be all grandmother-ly she say "look, a fire doggy!". In the way only a pretentious 4 year old who was obsessed with 101 Dalmations could, I responded "Its called a Dalmation, Grandma". She still has not let me live down my sassy 4 year old behavior...

hockeyfan42 · November 2015

@Sgoldberg247 my DD (3 1/2) corrects people all the time! For example, our neighbor came over to say hello. She complimented DD on her new dress. DD looks her straight in the eye and tells her, "um, it's actually a romper."

When my parents were visiting: Grandma takes DD to the bathroom when she wakes up. DD does her thing and Grandma says, " okay, now pull up your britches." DD rolled her eyes and said, "it's called underwear. Don't worry, you'll get it when you're older."

I love the idea of writing these things down for when they're older.

FutureMrsCAF · November 2015

DD calls everything "Daddy and Mom" lately. Everything from characters in a book to her little poops in the potty. She was helping me wash potatoes for dinner recently and picked out "Daddy and Mom" potatoes. She was not happy when I chopped them up.

Also, she calls cheese sticks "chomp dicks" hahaha!!!

WSU2015 · November 2015

I was taking a shower with my DS who is 4 a few weeks ago and he says "Mommy, your pee pee looks like a little butt." I died laughing! all I could manage to say to him was "Yes, yes it does."

I definitely should start writing this stuff down.

satcher08 · November 2015

I bent down to kiss my 2 year old dd while walking through Walmart the other day and she held up her hand and said "woah. easy mama. you need to chill." I honestly don't know where she gets this sass from haha.

andiie5 · November 2015

My 2.5 year old calls nipples and surrounding skin 'salamis'. I guess the pinky colour makes him think that lol

cattlebride · November 2015

Not my child but my younger brother was rubbing my grandma's Legs during the summer. He would say sticker? Sticker? Gamma owie?....she hadn't shaved her legs

theatremandy · November 2015

Oh, does my DS (almost 4) say some ringers. He's Facebook famous in my circle. Here's a few of his best:

"It's sad you don't have a penis and can't pee outside."

"Blueberries come from bubbles, and then we eat them."

"Ceiling fans blow poop out so it doesn't get in they bathtub."

"My baby brothers think I'm funny. That's why they cry. They laugh too hard."

augbride87 · November 2015

DD use to call a penis a peanut and occasionally still slips. Last night she yelled at the dog for stepping on her peanut. I said "Ry you don't have a penis." She said "Oh yeah riiiiiiight! She stepped on my pachina!!". Then she told me the dog was being "cray cray" and needed to go into the kennel.

Corts · November 2015

Yesterday I asked my 4yr old son why the carpet in his closet was wet and he very nonchalantly told me whenever he has a time out in his room, he pees in there. Duh, mom.

jerseybroadwaybaby · November 2015

for the longest time my kids pronounced the word "craft" as "crack". I'm a crafter so my kids used to talk about how we go to the crack store all the time, mommy does a lot of crack, she sells her crack for money at shows or online. Sometimes mommy does crack with us!!! Yeah it was great!

Mr0616 · November 2015

LOL love this thread.

My nephew is famous for these.

I was over at their house and went to the bathroom. I open the door to find him waiting outside. I think, aw cute. He then proceeds to ask me a million times why do I pee so loudly?!?!

And just recently - we were burying a cat, the second one in a month. So he is used to animals going to heaven as we say. As we are putting the finishing touches on the grave - he asks when are we burying the dog? Keep in mind, the dog is very healthy and very young. Def. brought some light to a sad situation.

hellomommas · November 2015

I was *ahem* using the toilet in a public restroom with my son in the stroller in the big stall with me... He yelled: "momma! Is that poop!!!! So that the whole restroom of ladies could hear. *sigh*

"Momma the baby in your belly says he wants to come out right now!"

... ("He isn't allowed to come out until he is big enough")

"Will he be big enough to reach the cookies!?" (There was a tempting plate of cookies on the counter).

Mom! Your legs are sharp! (Hadn't shaved in a few days)

MamaNicoleof3 · November 2015

My daughter is 7 1/2 and still slips and calls it a "pagina." Man alive

DS will be 6 next month and calls his balls his "knuckles." "Mom, I'm just moving my knuckles around." At least it's better than everyone knowing what he's talking about if he happens to mention it in public....

MillerMama13 · November 2015

DD (2.5) talks to our dog the way we talk to her.

"Don't go over there, sweetie. It's dangerous. You can get hurt. Ok sweetie?"

PBear93 · November 2015

Las night during bath time my 3 year old daughter and I had this conversation.
DD: I just love my jayjay so much!
Me: why?
DD: Because my jayjay is very, very special.

I was taking a nap last weekend when she came into my room whispering "don't wake up mommy. Daddy told me not to wake you up. Don't wake up mommy. I just wanted to look at you"

When picking out her Halloween costume " I want to be a hot dog. I want to be big and strong like a hot dog!"

And a conversation we had last week
DD: mommy. Can we play the f-ing game?
Me: what game is that?
DD: you know, the f-ing game. The game with lots of f's

alw12290 · November 2015

To announce to our five year old that he was gping to be a big brother, we got him a shirt to twll everyone the big news! The shirt said, only child expiring June 2016. His immediate response was, "what?! I'm dying?!" It was so funny yet I felt so bad that for a split second he thought he was expiring like food!! I will remember that forever. ♡♡

theatremandy · November 2015

DS had a friend over today to play. He asked her if she'd like to come watch him poop. Sigh.

itsStackie · November 2015

This literally just happened.
DD farted and then stood still making that face.
Me: "are you pooping?"
DD: "no" (how she normally responds) continues... "Don't look at me, just look at your phone."

Also, @augbride87 my DD says "peanuts" too even though I correct her each time.

MynaBird · November 2015

Mine likes to ask us for things the same way we might ask her if she wants them. So it will go:

Her: "Would you like some Goldfish in a bowl?"
Us: "Would YOU like some Goldfish crackers?"
Her: "Ummmm... Okay."

Like it was our idea and she's just kind of going along with us.

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The joys of being a mom... Funny things our kids say...

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