Need someone to talk to — The Bump
May 2016 Moms

Need someone to talk to

So I just received a call from my midwife that my 1st trimester screening came back and I have a 1:41 chance of my baby having Down's syndrome ...I'm so upset ...only my mom and husband know but I can't stop crying ...I'm so scared and upset and full of fear and sadness...anyone have any history of these kind of results coming back?

Re: Need someone to talk to

  • Sorry you are going through all this stress and sadness but @childcaremama hit the nail on the head. All you can do is focus on the positive side of the 40 in 41 chance of baby not having Down's. Will you be getting an amniocentesis done? Just try not to stress too much till you know all the details.
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  • I'm so sorry you're going through this. My cousin had a ratio like yours and went on to deliver a healthy baby, so try to stay optimistic. And remember the risk ratio is just that, it is not a diagnostic result. Thoughts & prayers for you!! Keep us posted!

  • Exactly what PP's said....I can't begin to imagine what you are going through, but remember that there are more chances that your baby will be born healthy than the chances that there will be a complication.  Hugs!
  • Hugs to you! Being a Mother is a whole new level of fear, especially with pregnancy when there is so much we can't control. Try to remember you have a 40 in 41 chance of your baby being not having Downs Syndrome. Wait until you know more. Cross that bridge if it comes. Hang in there!

    Thank you. I'm trying to stay positive and remember that my baby is a brave and blessed baby and God will see me thru this. It's just so much fear to handle.

  • Thank you ladies
  • I haven't gotten my screening back yet, although my risk did go up after my initial blood-work came back. I actually go in for a sonogram on Friday to screen. I should get a better idea of what my chances are in a week or two.

    I spoke to my doctor about this yesterday. He asked me if I knew what the tests meant and what the whole chance aspect means. These tests are not an end all nor do they really give you any answers of what to expect. Look at 1:41 chance... if you break it down in percentages it comes out to a 2% chance. And even then... it's a "chance". 

    In reality... odds are you will not have a child with Down Syndrome. I read that every year about 6 million women are pregnant in the United States, and out of those women, only about 20,000 (or .3%) have a child with Down's. But even with those pregnancies, most of those women will not have a child with Down Syndrome. That is because most pregnancies that are positive for Down syndrome naturally miscarry in the first trimester.

    Although the risk is still low, the question for you is are you going to love your baby any differently if they come out with Down Syndrome?

    If you are really concerned I would ask to speak with your midwife to get a better understanding of your results and what they actually mean. I know I felt better after speaking with my doctor yesterday. He was able to put things in perspective for me.
  • I know this must be so scary. Have you asked your doctor for any books or research that you can do concerning this just so you can be ahead of it? I'm trying to tread lightly and not sound insensitive but it may make you feel more comfortable to be ahead of the game and collect as much info as you can so you are as informed as possible. Then, (and try to stay positive if you can) if it ends up not being the case for your LO you'll be that much more relieved.
    Been married since 2009.
    Unicornuate Uterus (yes I menstruate glitter)
    Several MCs
    DD born 2013 (our miracle "you can't have babies" baby!)

  • *hugs 

    I have no experience with this (first time pregnancy), but my results come back in two days, and I am worried and frightened about this now, and so I just wanted to say that all my heart goes out to you and I hope everything will turn out to be alright. 
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • So sorry for your added stress... I agree that it is NOT a diagnosis... It's only a risk ratio. If you think about it, we are all at increased risk every day for a variety of things... when we get in the car there is always a chance we could get in a car accident... There's always a chance you pick up germs from a door nob and catch a cold... Risk ratios are everywhere. If we focus only on the risk and we forget about the reward... We get lost in the anxiety of "what if." Focus on the things you CAN control... You can control that this pregnancy gives you joy! You can control that you can feed this baby in every way possible to help it grow and mature! And you can control the overwhelming love you already have for this baby! Keep your chin up!
  • As the other posters said, it is a 40 to 41 chance, or 98% chance, that you won't have a baby with Down syndrome. That is really low. I also agree with the poster who suggested doing some research to be prepared. My husband and I spoke with a genetic counselor as I have Down syndrome in my family (older brother and an aunt) and a sister with a genetic disorder. Turns out it is just a coincidence and we have the same chances as anyone else. However, we have had discussions of the possibility of having a child with a genetic disorder. It is something we are nervous about too. I can also say, while it is hard and demanding, having a child with Down syndrome is such a blessing. There will be joys and pains, challenges and proud mama moments like with any child, only the moments may be for different reasons than what is happening in your child's peer's lives. My brother is one of the most awesome people I know. All parents-to-be (myself included) hope for healthy babies and if your child does have Down syndrome, it will be ok too :)
  • My sister was told her baby boy may have downs syndrome..he was born a happy healthy lil man. You just never know. Best of luck!
  • Try not to be upset...there is still only a 2% chance of it having Down syndrome. Try to focus only on what you can control. Best of luck!
  • Thanks ladies I took the harmony test and I'm supposed to get the results back Friday
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