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December 2015 Moms
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Dumb people and bed rest comments - RANT

MEMichelsonMEMichelson member
in December 2015 Moms
So we will be starting our 6th week of bed rest tomorrow - whoohoo....not. I understand why I'm on it and I fully understand the benefits of keeping this tiny human in for as long as possible. BUT if one more person tells me that I need to 'enjoy laying down and watching Netflix, because once the baby comes you won't have that opportunity' or 'you're so luck to be able to just lay on the couch all day long'. LUCKY!?!?! WTH, no we are not lucky and not this is not something I enjoy. I don't like not being able to go into the office or see people or even go to the store. I don't like that people think that this is some sort of vacation where all I get to do is 'relax' and 'enjoy' this down time. 

People don't get it and I'm overly irritated at people and their dumb comments. Positive thing is....I can work from home so I'm still putting in my 40+ hours each week until we finally deliver this little guy. But until then I really just want to slap people who tell me to enjoy this. We are social people, we like to go out and do things, I enjoy going to meetings (crazy yes, but I love my job) this is not a vacation. This is a constant worry that if I move or walk around the house that he will just slip on out a little too early. I worry about each and every contraction and all the pressure that he's forcing down right now. He's been head down and trying to escape since week 28 - this is NOT a vacation! 

I really hate people sometimes and I'm REALLY tired of people telling me all about their bed rest stories (oh yes I know what you are going through, I was on bed rest for a week...) or even my mom saying 'well I was on bed rest with you for 2 months and I had your brother to deal with, so I don't know why it's so hard for you to sit still. You're doing this for the baby' No crap mom - I know i'm doing this for the baby thank you - also mom please stop comparing my pregnancy to yours - WE ARE ALL DIFFERENT! 

Times like this, I really wish I could have a whisky sour....
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Re: Dumb people and bed rest comments - RANT

  • breezypipbreezypip member
    Yes!! I've been on bed rest and working from home for about 6 weeks now as well. I am allowed to go into the office 1 day a week though (my weekly highlight!), but other than that I don't leave the house or do anything ar home but lay in bed or the couch.

    I get a lot of "oh that must be nice!" Or "I would love that, you're so lucky!". Then they look at me like I have three heads when I tell them I HATE it. I get to sit around and look at all things I want to do or need to be done and can't do anything about it. I had to miss events like Halloween, pumpkin picking, get togethers, etc that I really wanted to do. On top of that laying around is harder on your body than you might think! I am sore from laying down so much. I had planned on staying active throughout pregnancy since I was an avid runner, but now I'm not even supposed to walk around a grocery store. It blows. My muscles are turning to jelly. It's all worth it and I would do it twice over to deliver a healthy full term baby... But don't tell me I'm "lucky".
    BabyFruit Ticker
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  • CmagnoCmagno member
    I think bed rest would be my nightmare! Hugs to both of you! You're amazing mommas and anyone who thinks bedrest sounds fun or easy is insane!!
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  • JulieK79JulieK79 member
    When I was on bed rest last time I did feel a bit better when I heard from people that they had been on bed rest. Even though we are all different I knew that they "got" how I felt at least more than others who hadn't gone through that experience.

    It is so not a vacation and it's one of the hardest things to do. Keeping you both in my thoughts!
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  • MurphyerMurphyer member
    I have been on bedrest for 2 weeks now and I'm already starting to lose my mind. I don't know how you two ladies have been doing it for 6 weeks already.... It's tough! I agree with OP, I miss going into work. My only saving grace seems to be that I can work from home so I'm still able to get mental stimulation and social interaction that way.

    This next part will sound like a complaint but I keep trying to focus on being grateful instead... My MIL has been kind enough to fly into town and stay with us to help with our 13mo DD and she cooks, cleans, laundry, and pretty much anything I need. She is a wonderful amazing and annoying woman. But we couldn't be doing this without her.

    What is it we tell ourselves? Oh yes... This too shall pass and it's all for the good of our growing babies.

    But also, this F'ing sucks! :)
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  • Peanut1128Peanut1128 member
    Without thinking about it, I could see myself saying "I would love to be in bed rest, sign me up". After a day or two though, I know I would be bored and really miss my routine. I think a lot of people speak without thinking. I hope this time passes quickly for you and if your up for it, maybe have some friends come over for dinner or a game night to make it more enjoyable.
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  • Daphneh28Daphneh28 member
    I was on modified rest for three months at the beginning and OP Yes yes YES to everything you said. I feel your pain. People were like oh just rest but your head won't let you rest worrying about the baby. Hello! Even though I'm "better" now it's still a bit complicated and my pregnancy isn't all that healthy and I would give and arm and a leg to have a happy healthy get fat get swollen I feel glowing pregnancy. But then I think of all the alternatives and I say okay God this is what you handed me and I'll take it. A million times and with a thankful smile. So it may sound weird but if you think it could be tougher (hey we are pregnant and carrying after all many women wish they could do just that and they would give and arm and a leg to be pregnant and in bed rest) you gain some perspective. But I get it ladies. It is rough. I feel like pregnancy has been my greatest challenge, physically emotionally spiritually and mentally. And I'm so thankful it's almost over. We are one bunch of tough ladies and we can't let anyone tell us we can't do anything. We are carrying these kids and giving life, there is nothing impossible for us.
    Lilypie Breastfeeding tickers
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  • MEMichelsonMEMichelson member
    One thing that has been really nice, is that we have had lots of friends/family come over and visit for a while or even just drop off dinner. It's nice to see people from the outside world! Sad when the most exciting part of the day is having a doctors appointment getting dressed in normal clothes just to be violated by the doctor and then back home to sweatpants :) I am very thankful that he is healthy and still growing as he should be. Took us forever to conceive him (lots of meds and donors) and I'm still shocked that there is a tiny person in there - it's just hard to listen to the dumb comments about enjoying this time. I am enjoying this time but I'm also worried all the time and every twinge and muscle spasm freaks me out. I'm just ready to meet him and start my actual leave :)

    Thank you for all your comments and support - glad we have some place we can empty our minds and not be alone 
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  • BGtwins+1BGtwins+1 member
    I was on bedrest for 19 weeks with my last pregnancy and I hated it because I became so weak. It took a few weeks to get my strength back after I gave birth. Next time someone gives you a hard time, just tell them the only other option is to jeopardize baby's health and that you are wasting away. It's not pleasant and I feel your pain! Not much longer to go now. Hang in there :)

    If your doc says its ok, try to do some arm and leg exercises while lying down to keep your strength up. Good luck.
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  • ZoeyRaeJamesZoeyRaeJames member
    I haven't been put on bed rest, but I understand being irritated with people! The hubby isn't irritating, he's far from it! He's actually very helpful, caring, and tolerant of my funky moods. :))

    What bothers me, is the millions of questions I get from people! Like What's it like being so small framed, and veing prego?! Well...it isn't THAT tough, People! Lol! Or, how are you doing? ... Didn't you just ask me this like..2 seconds ago?! There are many more. But come one, People. Lay off the questions. I can be easily irritated. :-S
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  • casicatalanacasicatalana member
    OMG im laughing so hard because i totally agree with everythinf you said. im in the same boat and its true, this is not a vacation. More so- why do people make the actually parenting sound like its going to be a nightmare once the baby is born? i wish people were more encouraging and kind.
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  • TaylovesbradTaylovesbrad member
    Yeah you are not lucky. People are jerks.
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