Freaking out about day care

GoatSnakeMouse · November 2015

DH and I are finally starting to look at day cares in our area (here in DC, starting to look at day cares after you're already pregnant is considered way late) and I am freaking out because... how do I know what to look for in a day care? I don't have any experience with kids. I feel like somebody's asking me to go check out an auto assembly plant and report back. Like, I have literally no experience doing that, why do you think I would be able to make a qualified assessment?

Can somebody talk me down here? Maybe I'm a little clingy because of previous MC but right now the idea of letting my baby out of my sight for a second seems horrifying (yes, I'm hormonal). HELP.

cmerribury · November 2015

Look into what their methods are for crying babies (pick them up, let them cry it out), if baby will have a cot/crib to themselves, what their curriculum is when baby is older, how much outside time baby will have, what the ratio of teacher to child is (for infants you want a 1:3 ratio ideally). Also look for a place where you feel comfortable and that's clean. Those are really important.

saladflambe · November 2015

I'm in your area (ish). Northern Virginia. I posted on my community's Facebook yard sale page asking local moms for recommendations.

kristib1027 · November 2015

A few day cares in my area also have cameras so parents can log into their website and monitor their child and the care. Ask if that's something they offer. You could also look into a nanny or home child care, but @cmerribury brought up great questions to ask when making the decision!

arcanejinx · November 2015

I work in childcare so when I have to put my child into care I will be the worst picky mom.

Check your local regulations on staffing etc. here ratios are 1:4 for infants 1:6 for toddlers and 1:8 for preschool with 1:12 for part day preschool. If a Center doesn't meet your regions regulations move on.

Ask about the daily schedule (yes even infant rooms should have a schedule-though with more wiggle room since it is infants). Walk the rooms during the tour. Are the shelves neat? Or are there enough toys for the children (keep in mind if it's free time they may not be on the shelf but see if the toys are clean)? Is it clean? How about the changing areas? If there is a dedicated nap space ask to see it. Is there childrens art on display in the rooms? Do the staff seem friendly and welcoming? Are they interacting with the children/being near them or are they huddled together? Ask about how the teachers are educated-here regulations state for a daycare one teacher per room has to have their ECE-where I work all teachers have their ECE as a center policy. Also ask what teaching policies they go by (ermergent circulum or teacher directed), their policies on discipline, and procedures for accidents.

Even if someplace comes recommended and meet everything but you just don't like it move on. You want your child to feel comfortable being there and if you aren't comfortable they will pick it up. A lot of centres offer to do a slow intro (we do a half day visit with parents in room/building, then half day visit alone, then full day) that so many don't take advantage of.

You may decide to do a home based daycare. I recommend you find one that even though it's not a daycare keeps your areas ratios in mind. Are there toys for all ages/a dedicated play space? Ask to see a background check and here we also have a child abuse registry which parents can also see that we have passed it. Ask them why they opened the home based care-a lot here are run by ECE teachers who wanted to stay home with their own kids. Ask about what happens if they are sick-and notification about vacations. Ask about other family members in the house.

That's all I can think of off the top of my head. Hope this helps anyone gather their thoughts about the center. If you visit during the typical drop off or pick up times feel free to ask a parent or two how they feel about the Center. And most importantly do the children seem happy?

Ok, now I really think I've gotten all my thoughts out.

delujm0 · November 2015

Does your state have a daycare review board? I'm in NC and the state ranks daycares on a 1 to 5 star basis depending on what they offer, their ratios, complaints that have been filed, inspections that have been done, etc. We were lucky to have 3 five star centers within 5 miles of our house, so we visited all three of them and picked the one we liked the most (which also happened to be the one that is less than 1.5 miles away).

I will say that we visited some that have the online video camera option, and i did not want that. The last thing i need is to get fired for spending all day streaming my DD's daycare class on my computer while i'm supposed to be working! When we drop her off she gets excited to be there and when we pick her up she seems happy and well cared for. that's all i need.

desertheart · November 2015

I worked in childcare for many years, and I'm freaking out, too. The only way I would really be happy with LO in daycare would be if he went to the on-campus one where I work so I can BF and pick him up early when I have slow afternoons in my office. We put our name in and we have a 50-50 chance for next August. Say what???? There is very little infant care available in my area. The ones that are good have waiting lists so long the kid will be a toddler before you get the call.

smileybabyboy · November 2015

Make sure there are no restrictions for dropping in unexpectedly, if there are, then it's not a place to pick. We chose a home daycare for our child a few years ago. It was cheaper than the larger places. I liked that it was small so more attention from the caregivers. There is an assistant so the daycare won't close in case the director is sick or has an emergency. All the children are in the same room which I like now since my toddler loves babies and now has experience being around them since we are expecting our second in a few months.

SaltyMcNulty · November 2015

I would XP your post to the Working Moms board, too. Also, do a google search for potential questions (and red flags) to look for in a daycare. Finally, find out if you have access in your state (not sure if you're exactly DC or VA or MD), and see if you can view daycare license info, complaints and follow-up actions taken, etc.

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