February 2016 Moms

3rd Trimester

Since some of us are now in or coming up on our 3rd Trimester, I was wondering what advice STMs+ have for us FTMs that we may not necessarily think about in the coming weeks. Whether it's something that we wouldn't think to do or just something to remember to calm the crazy.

Part of me feels like February is so far away but then other times I'm like HOLY CRAP the holidays fly by and I'm only 15 weeks from having an outside baby. I feel like I haven't done anything that I should be doing to prepare but also how prepared can you really be?

Is there anything that always makes the 3rd trimester "to-do list" that you think is unnecessary/overrated?

Re: 3rd Trimester

  • Hmmmm. I'm drawing a blank on to do's other then the traditional. If anything I'd say most of the to-do's can actually wait besides having a changing area with clothes and diapers and a cosleeper or crib for them. I was so stressed about having everything ready but really there's a ton of stuff that can wait. We are team green this time as we were with our first. But the 1st time around I HAD to have the nursery done and this time around I'll decorate after baby's born.
    Other then that I'm anticipating the stage coming up soon where they start to stretch their feet out up in your ribs and you can literally see footprints on your stomach! Ouch but so cool too. Oh and my number 1 recommendation is a vibrating bouncer with lights and music. I used the everloving crap out of mine with both my sons. It was how I could shower every day and almost always kept them happy. When they couldn't sleep I'd put them in there and it worked like a charm!
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  • My biggest thing is just to make sure that you have a place for baby to sleep, a changing area, and a couple weeks worth of onesies cleaned and ready to go. Other than that everything else can wait. I personally am a little crazy about cleanliness so in the last few weeks of my pregnancy I did a huge top to bottom cleaning of everything and anything I could think of. The oven was scrubbed out, kitchen cabinets washed, baseboards washed, windows cleaned, I took down all of the curtains and washed them, dusted the blinds... all of the things that don't get done every day or week. I really wanted to make sure that when I came home with baby that I didn't have a mountain of laundry or dirty sheets to wash and toilets to scrub so I stayed on top of all of that stuff before hand. Doing all of that gave me a solid week to rest and recuperate and get tons of snuggles in with B without having to do anything. Also, I loved having crockpot meals frozen and ready to go. I prepped everything and froze enough dinners for 3 weeks when I was about 35 Weeks along last time. I will be doing the same this go around.    

     
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  • I agree with a bouncer. I also have a swing. We used both with dd. I'm a planner and like to have everything before baby comes, but it's not necessary. Third trimester the two main things I can think of are to pack hospital bag and prepare, get informed for all kinds of labor/delivery. Have a plan, but be informed of the alternatives. With dd I was induced at 37w1d for preeclampsia and had a 24.5 hr labor. The epidural took 9 tries to get one that worked. I was so scared of not having it work because I wasn't prepared for non medicated birth. This time I'm planning on epidural but preparing for non medicated.

    Other than that, pamper yourself, rest, and date your SO/DH. Enjoy the last times alone just the two of you. Even the simple things like eating together get more difficult once baby comes
  • Last time my MIL made us a bunch of frozen meals, which were great!  I'm going to try and freeze some extra meals in December and January to stock up.  Also, do some deep cleaning now ( which I think most people do before the holidays anyway) because you won't want to do it later.  Like PP, I don't remember any regrets or such last time.  Try and talk with your SO about a game plan with people wanting to visit after the baby is born so you are on the same page for when people ask.

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  • We used a co-sleeper and I set up a station on my night stand with diapers, wipes, destine, a change of clothes...initially I breastfeed but once we switched to formula, I filled up 3 bottles with water (they will drink them room temp) and used one of those travel formula dispensers by the bed. So I never actually have to get up when DD woke up in the middle of the night. I just pulled baby into bed with me, changed diaper, feed, burped and put back in co-sleeper.

    I am hoping to breast feed the entire first year this time but if that doesn't work out, I'll be doing the above again.

    Other than that, standard advice...sleep when they sleep...it's okay if you don't shower for a day or two (or four...lol), don't worry about cleaning the house, don't shake the baby (not even a little)...I know that sounds crazy to include but my pediatrician said to us and anytime someone watched our baby we said it to them (even our own parents)...he said putting it out there reduces the chance of it happening.
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  • Go out on dates with your SO!! I wish that we had done more of that before DD arrived. And it's not that we didn't have family support or people willing to watch her so that we could go out, but really we wanted to spend our time with her and we were too tired/lazy to plan anything :).

    Another thing (in addition to what others have suggested), make sure that your car seat is installed at least one month before your due date. This has caught many FTM and STMs I know off guard when they went into early labor... So while mom & baby are in the hospital after birth, dad/SO has to go home and figure out how to install it before bringing mommy and baby home!
  • I agree with the "Pamper yourself, sleep as much as you can, go on dates with DH" type of advice. This is baby #3 for me and I am taking that advice. Might not be my last few months childless, but it is my last with only two! DH and I will hopefully go away together for a couple nights, because who knows when we'll feel comfortable dropping off all 3 kids somewhere for a night! It could honestly be a couple years, depending on how this baby is and the way life goes. We'll go on dates because I know myself well enough to know that I'm not going to feel like leaving the baby for a few months for any real length of time. Well binge watch shows at night because even though it's still fun to do that with a newborn around, I also really miss true alone time when baby is little and staying up until at least 10 every night. It's nice to look back and remember that we did those things.

    I'll also make some freezer meals and stock up on groceries - especially easy meals and snacks.
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  • I agree with freezer meals, car seat installation, date nights, and pampering. I think every pregnant woman should get at least one prenatal massage and a pedicure. I asked for gift certificates for Christmas and my birthday with DD.
    This time I want DH to have a professional come clean my house before baby. Also I have been really working on potty training DD this week because I don't want two in diapers and I know it'll be harder when baby is here
    Also if you're planning on breastfeeding make sure you have all your supplies; pads, cream, nipple shields( I had inverted nipples with DD and they really helped), Nursing bras tanks and pjs, and some sort of pillow. It sucks to have to send DH out for something when he has no idea what it is
  • Thanks, everyone!

    Some of these things I was planning on doing but I hadn't thought I'd need to install the car seat that far in advance -although it makes perfect sense.

    Ooh, I really like the idea of having someone else come and clean my house as well. 
  • As a stm I will say don't stress too much and do a little here and there. I am 26 weeks and I just started doing some of the laundry and sorting what I was keeping and preparing the room. It's important to just relax and enjoy this time and don't stress about it too much . Also baby proofing (I've seen a lot of ftm talk about this already) can absolutely wait your baby isn't coming out a crawler I promise lol.
  • I'm 26 weeks with baby #2 and have done no prep at all! I really need to get on it. At least I'm having another girl so I basically have everything I need in the house, I just have to dig it out of the basement.
    I would try to hang out with friends and your SO as much as possible! Those first few weeks (and months, really) are a blur and it's hard to make time for anyone other than baby.
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  • A lot of sites say to pack your hospital bag around 36 weeks. I suggest packing it earlier and start bringing it in your car to every prenatal appointment from 34 weeks on. If you end up with a surprise complication, they could send you straight from your appointment. It happened to me at 36 weeks.

    Also, just make sure the car seat is in the car nice and early and that the bassinet (or whatever baby will sleep in) is set up.
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  • A lot of sites say to pack your hospital bag around 36 weeks. I suggest packing it earlier and start bringing it in your car to every prenatal appointment from 34 weeks on. If you end up with a surprise complication, they could send you straight from your appointment. It happened to me at 36 weeks. Also, just make sure the car seat is in the car nice and early and that the bassinet (or whatever baby will sleep in) is set up.
    We're getting our car seat from my mom at my baby shower the day I'll be 28 weeks.  I plan on getting it installed with help from local people who help install and check the safety of the car seat.  Would it be a good idea to go on ahead and get it done as soon as we get the car seat? 
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  • @egraves4 - it couldn't hurt. Then you're prepared. I'll probably put mine in around week 30 or 31 this time
  • Maybe I'm the odd ball, this is #3 for us and even with #2 i don't remember putting the car seat in until the baby got here.  DH had to go home anyway to take care of #1, so it wasn't a big deal.  Even with #1, H went home b/c he needed to leave the hospital and shower and stuff, so he went home and took care of some business like the car seat.  I wouldn't worry about what you have ready or not b/c regardless of what is ready for baby at your house you will be ready with what you have.  Go with the flow.  It's much more relaxed that way.

    But I do agree with some of the others saying spend time with you H b/c things won't be the same once baby gets here.  and some frozen meals couldn't hurt ;)
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  • Twindling said:

    It's not really advised to install the whole seat so early. Generally just the base. You can always get the seat when the time comes and you need it.

    If you install the whole thing at 30 weeks and god forbid get in a fender bender or even more serious accident at 37 weeks...now you have to replace the entire seat and base instead of just the base.

    Yes, this. Remember that if you're in a car accident that your car can't drive away from, car seats and booster seats need to be replaced (and insurance should cover the cost)

    If you're giving birth in a hospital, there will be time to install everything, including the base; no need to stress about that.

    You should be learning how to install the base and seat yourself anyway, it's not just getting a professional to do it and then never being able to do it yourself!

    I think cleaning, stocking up on basics (diapers, onesies & household supplies like toilet paper and cleaners), and frozen meal prep are most important.

    With my first I ended up in the hospital to deliver him without a bag packed, and it wasn't a big deal. The hospital often provides you with almost everything and there will be time for the dad to go get stuff if you don't have a family member to help you out. It's nice to be prepared, but again, don't stress!

    I've never had a nursery set up, just a place for baby to sleep and to do diaper changes (the floor with a basket of supplies works as well!)

    If it's fun for you to do all sorts of prep, by all means do so. But don't stress too much!


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  • This is my third pregnancy. I'm 27 weeks tomorrow with twins and I have done little to no prep. I think the only thing I've done is had DH pull down the baby clothes so I can look through them at some point. We're finding out the sexes at the end of the month and my friends are throwing a small shower for me in a couple of weeks, so the prep will probably kick in then. Other than that I'm trying to make sure that I have everything done that I need and not worrying too much about babies yet. I have school stuff to finish and am trying to be prepared in case of bed rest. The one prep thing I plan on doing very soon is packing my hospital bag, but I'm only doing it this early because of the twins. With a singleton I always waited until early/mid 30 weeks.


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  • I'll make sure my car seat is installed around 37 weeks or so. I'll Set up the bassinet around 37 weeks too. I will buy my favorite giant pads and get some big old granny panties and some nursing pads. I think that's about it. Having a second girl so I don't have too much to get ready. I couldn't sleep for anything those final weeks so catching up on sleep is not really on my to do list this time lol
  • This is #2 for us, and after reading through everyone else's suggestions and reflecting here's my tips.

    I totally agree that the nursery doesn't have to be perfect.  Once baby gets here, you will just want to re-arrange and re-organize as you settle into a routine.  Make sure you have a place for baby to sleep set up, with changing area next to it and fully stocked with diapers and wipes.  For us, that will be in our bedroom for the first couple weeks.  We are using a pack n play with a basket of changing supplies.  Thus, a wonderfully set up changing table in the nursery would be useless.  

    One thing I made sure to do with my first, and am working on again now is labeling.  I had a c-section and will be again, so I've labeled all the drawers so that when hubby or aunt or grandma go in to get baby or my toddler's clothes out it makes it so much easier for them.  Of course, I know where everything is, but it just helps everyone who is here to help out.  Drawers just have a piece of masking tape on them that say stuff like "pjs" or "blankets".

    Our church provides meals for the first two weeks, but if you don't have anyone to do that, stock your freezer!  Another good thing to stock up on is paper plates/cups/spoons&forks. That way no one has to worry with doing dishes for awhile.  

    As for you personally, go out on some dates!  It'll be a couple months at least, before you are ready to leave baby alone with a sitter. Stock up on nursing pads (but keep the receipt just in case you are allergic to them) and a couple different size pads.  Yes, you will want super huge ones, but eventually you will work into needing the more basic size too.  

    Make yourself (and SO) a snack bag for the hospital stay!  My MIL did this for us and it was the best thing to have a snack bags of cookies/crackers and capri suns/mini water bottles that we could snack on while we were there.  I had a c-section so we were there several days.  

    I didn't scrub top to bottom before baby, but I did make sure that dishes were done, bathroom was clean, floor was vacuumed.  That sort of thing.  Because, yet again, with my c-section I didn't do any cleaning for awhile and hubby hates to clean!  He did clean when needed, but not as good as I would.
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  • I just thought of one thing that I wished I had done differently last time around. This time I think I'll select a few different going home outfits for the baby. A preemie, a newborn, and a 0 to 3 month size. You don't know what size your baby is going to be when he or she is born and it would be nice to have a few different choices in case the one you picked out doesn't fit. My son was born at 6 pounds and was 5.5 pounds by the time we left the hospital, so he was too small for newborn clothes. The going home outfit that we had brought for him was way too big. So, he ended up going home in a hospital issued preemie onesie and a Blankey. Sure, a cute going home outfit is not a necessity, but it's something I would do differently this time around.
  • I have done nothing to prepare for this baby! It's my second, but even with number 1, I didn't do much at all till after he was born. My husband went out and bought a car seat while baby and I were in hospital, and where I live people don't have showers or registries, just give you presents (mostly clothing) after the birth. The advice I'd give first-time moms is that you and your baby will be fine without the mountain of stuff! You can get stuff as you go, and won't be stuck with a bunch of useless crap you thought you might need.
  • It's not really advised to install the whole seat so early. Generally just the base. You can always get the seat when the time comes and you need it. If you install the whole thing at 30 weeks and god forbid get in a fender bender or even more serious accident at 37 weeks...now you have to replace the entire seat and base instead of just the base.
    Yes, this. Remember that if you're in a car accident that your car can't drive away from, car seats and booster seats need to be replaced (and insurance should cover the cost) If you're giving birth in a hospital, there will be time to install everything, including the base; no need to stress about that. You should be learning how to install the base and seat yourself anyway, it's not just getting a professional to do it and then never being able to do it yourself! I think cleaning, stocking up on basics (diapers, onesies & household supplies like toilet paper and cleaners), and frozen meal prep are most important. With my first I ended up in the hospital to deliver him without a bag packed, and it wasn't a big deal. The hospital often provides you with almost everything and there will be time for the dad to go get stuff if you don't have a family member to help you out. It's nice to be prepared, but again, don't stress! I've never had a nursery set up, just a place for baby to sleep and to do diaper changes (the floor with a basket of supplies works as well!) If it's fun for you to do all sorts of prep, by all means do so. But don't stress too much!
    By the way we're not just having it installed and leaving lol.  It's a program my county does where pregnant mom's and dad's can go and actually be hands on and learn how to install the car seat and then you'll already know if it was correctly installed!  But I am probably going to hold off at least until January before we go now - I know I will already have a lot going on in December anyway.
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  • Is anyone doing anything to prepare their bodies for labor?
    I just picked up some third trimester earth mama Angel baby third trimester tea.
    I also heard that it's a good idea to start doing Kegels.
    Curious what you guys are doing to prepare.
  • Is anyone doing anything to prepare their bodies for labor?
    I just picked up some third trimester earth mama Angel baby third trimester tea.
    I also heard that it's a good idea to start doing Kegels.
    Curious what you guys are doing to prepare.

    Hypnobabies! And lots of squats, yoga and bouncing in the birthing ball.
  • Is anyone doing anything to prepare their bodies for labor?
    I just picked up some third trimester earth mama Angel baby third trimester tea.
    I also heard that it's a good idea to start doing Kegels.
    Curious what you guys are doing to prepare.

    I have a second boppy pillow to sit on after the baby is born. I found that to be sooooo helpful when DD was born. I've started doing yoga too. I'll buy my granny panties and giant pads too.
  • Is anyone doing anything to prepare their bodies for labor? I just picked up some third trimester earth mama Angel baby third trimester tea. I also heard that it's a good idea to start doing Kegels. Curious what you guys are doing to prepare.
    Yoga!  I also bought pregnancy tea.
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