Babies: 6 - 9 Months
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Sleep issues...sleep training?

Hi all...long story short..I am trying to sleep train my 6 month old...something I said I would NEVER do.  He never slept through the night, sometimes woke up 5 times.  He maybe napped 2x a day, possibly 3, for no more than 20-30 min.  This baby was so tired all the time...  I tried 3 prong approach per doctor:  Tylenol in case he was teething.  Didn't work.  Intro of solids a few weeks back in case he was hungry.  Didn't work.  Then sleep train.  I seriously never wanted to do it but I was desperate, not for me, but for him.  He literally was so incapable of sleeping that he had no energy.  He is in PT for delayed gross motor skills.  One day, after a miraculously good nights sleep and excellent nap he did things he has never done before.  I was like...omg this poor guy.  Thing was, he was never cranky so I never knew.  I also asked my cousin and his wife, who are the parents of 5, happy, healthy kids.  My cousin's wife also happens to be a pediatrician and she recommended Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child.

Well.things don't seem to be improving.  I adjust his bedtime and sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.  Tonight he was super cranky by 4:30/5...he was out by 5:45...woke up screaming 40 min later.  We tried to let him self soothe but that didn't work so we caved and got him.  I know some of you will say this is cruel but I felt it was more cruel to let him be chronically exhausted.  Does anyone have words of encouragement, stories of success of teaching their babies how to sleep?  The doctors at the practice were adamant he needed more rest than he was getting so this is where I am.  I thought this method was so supposed to get easier.  Not harder....help.  Sad mama.

Re: Sleep issues...sleep training?

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    First off,  sleep training doesn't have to be some HORRIBLE experience and something you swear you will never do. IMHO, teaching a kid how to sleep is just like everything else you have to teach them and CIO isn't the only option. There are lots of ways to sleep train but nothing will work if you aren't consistent.

    I have 2 kids. A 3.5 year old and an 11 month old. I've done some sort of sleep training with them both and it has been fabulous. They are happy and well rested children who will not grow up to be disconnected, messed up adults because of it :)

    First off you need to formulate a plan ahead of time, know what you are going to do and then stick with it. DO NOT GIVE IN. Make sure both you and your husband or SO are on the same page and stick to your plan no matter what. You cannot cave and pick up your LO because right now, he knows that is what you are going to do. You are not being cruel. I repeat, you are not being cruel. He won't remember any of this.

    Consistency is key, trust me. If you are consistent, sleep training will only take a few days and a few tears.  

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    Sorry to hear you're going through this! I would suggest trying to leave him to fuss or CIO for increments that gradually increase. Maybe start with 5 and go in and pat, shush, soothe without picking him up until he's calm and then 10 minutes the next time and so on. It worked well for my daughter but I definitely went in right away if she was hysterical. It's hard not to, I know, but I at least tried to soothe her without picking her up as much as I could. Does he have a paci? A lot of times my daughter would wake up because the paci would fall out of her mouth and I was stuck for a little while having to constantly go in and replace it. I have heard great things about the book you mentioned but you will definitely have to feel it out with your babe and find what works for him.

    Again, I'm so sorry you're having such a rough go. As the previous poster mentioned, consistency is key. Stick with one method and be strong in your resolve. Sometimes we had to turn the monitor down during our increments of letting our daughter fuss for our own sanity. I hope things get better for you.
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    Read my post "at my wits end" a couple posts down. Been there and still am some nights. We finally settled on a bedtime between 7-7:45 (depending on how tired he is) no matter when he last nap was. We finally after 8 months of ZERO sleep decided to do CIO with no checks. We tried the CIO with checks around 6 months and it was a 3 weeks major fail. I always said I'd never do CIO but like you, I was soooooooooooooo desperate. Like, I need medication because I'm depressed and now sleep deprived desperate. It's been going so much better this time. He barely cried and now after he eats I just lay him down and he falls asleep. He still wakes up about 3 hours later but usually puts himself back to sleep rather then quickly then I kept the MOTN (usually about 3 am) feeding and he's up about 6:30. We still have rough nights but nothing like it was. To each their own on sleep training, we did it and my baby is still happy as can be and, now, well rested. Good luck, I feel your pain :-(
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    A video baby monitor (I like my lorex) will be your savior to not go in. :)

    I like the troublesome tots web site.
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    I am probably not much help, as I have posted on here about sleep issues as well, but just wanted to say I know how you feel! My baby is chronically overtired and that means she is impossible. I totally understand what you are going through. A couple of things that have helped my LO with her sleep is following the appropriate wake times, using white noise machines and making sure the bedroom is blackout. Another thing is when you do sleep train you need to make sure you will be home on a regular basis to stick to schedule. Do you have a sleep time routine? My LO really needs a wind down before naps/bed and that has also helped. Good luck!
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    Thanks everyone, just seeing these now.  The sleep training just wasn't working...we tried several methods.  Maybe again in the near future, now it's teething pain.  Oy.  And we are ruling out some health issues so in the interim Id rather just hold and soothe him until I know everthing is ok.  Until then, coffee and undereye concealer for me.  
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    Cry it out worked like magic for me. In one night. And she didn't even cry that much. She's been sleeping through the night ever since. BUT...I haven't gone through teething yet. Nervous!
    "It's always better when we're together." -Jack Johnson
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