Question from a TTC

Kmom2be · October 2015

Hi Everyone, congrats! I can't wait to graduate to this board. I'm in cycle 2 of seriously trying and went off the pill in late July. I've been regular my whole life on and off pill so I thought it would happen right away. We had intercourse EOD and a few days in a row during my fertile window and I got a positive OPK. But AF came and it was awful. This cycle I'm on day 15 and was supposed to ovulate last week but have gotten negative OPKs. I'm using FF and Ovia as apps and temping and OPKs. We are also doing EOD the whole cycle and have done every day a couple times. We are also using Preseed. We did an at home sperm test which came back normal. I am very fit and healthy. I have been on prenatals for 4 months. Hubby is overweight but his family is very fertile. I am looking for your best advice. Was there a food you ate, trick you used? What worked? Thank you!

mrsp2213 · October 2015

Temp and chart. OPK's are great for timing but don't confirm O, that's why the temping is essential.

As for timing, we had sex ED during the FW (-4 all the way through +1) and 3x's a week throughout the rest of the cycle. I gave myself 3 months of temping and charting with FF after going off the pill to give my body time to adjust and to get to know my cycle before starting to TTC.

I didn't change my eating/drinking/exercise habits while TTC. I don't think there's any food or trick, it's really a combo of luck and science.

Most importantly it can take a perfectly healthy, fertile couple up to a year to conceive. Even with the best of timing your chances are still 20% each cycle. Stay patient (easier said than done) have some fun and try to enjoy the process. Best of luck!

WSU2015 · October 2015

I personally chose not to temp and chart. I checked CM and had sex EOD. My personal view was that if your having sex EOD then confirming O isn't necessary. I know a lot of people love temping but for me it wasn't a factor. I would start checking CM if you aren't already. And by all means if you want to temp and chart it can't hurt!

lalala2004 · October 2015

It sounds like you're doing everything you can. I also stopped drinking alcohol and significantly lowered my caffeine intake. That may not have affected anything, but that's what I did.

Even with well timed sex, it's a 20% chance every time. Just try to enjoy all the sex while trying.

little_bren · October 2015

It takes up to a year for a healthy couple. Keep your chin up!

ecwk · October 2015

I temped and lowered my caffeine intake, I was on Metformin and I upped my workouts and I lost some weight, we used Preseed but really at the end of the day I think it was all of these thrown in with a huge dose of luck. Keep trying and best of luck. It can take up to a year.

dennyandlee · October 2015

I used the Ovia app as well and used CM patterns to verify FW. I think this was the most helpful for me. The cycle we conceived I also took guaifenesin (Mucinex) to increase fertile CM (you have to drink lots of water if you do this). I got off BC the end of April and we conceived in September.

clairemwalker · October 2015

I think temping will be your friend if you want to maximise your chances each cycle. I agree that if you have sex EOD from AF ending to AF beginning then you will definitely hit peak time, but that will get exhausting and less enjoyable should it take more then a few cycles. As pp have said, even with the most perfectly timed sex you only have about a 20% chance each cycle. If you temp then at least you can limit sex EOD to the 14 days surrounding your true fertile time. We were lucky enough to get pregnant second cycle, but i dont ovulate until around cd23 so if i had assumed OV around cd14 then it could have taken forever as there is no way we would have kept up that much sex month after month.

DustyMelons · October 2015

Kmom2be said:

Hi Everyone, congrats! I can't wait to graduate to this board. I'm in cycle 2 of seriously trying and went off the pill in late July. I've been regular my whole life on and off pill so I thought it would happen right away. We had intercourse EOD and a few days in a row during my fertile window and I got a positive OPK. But AF came and it was awful. This cycle I'm on day 15 and was supposed to ovulate last week but have gotten negative OPKs. I'm using FF and Ovia as apps and temping and OPKs. We are also doing EOD the whole cycle and have done every day a couple times. We are also using Preseed. We did an at home sperm test which came back normal. I am very fit and healthy. I have been on prenatals for 4 months. Hubby is overweight but his family is very fertile. I am looking for your best advice. Was there a food you ate, trick you used? What worked? Thank you!

Patience. As PP stated, it can take a healthy couple up to a year to conceive.

You're literally on your second cycle TTC, take a breath and just continue to do what you have been. Temping and charting are the best things to do to find your fertile window.

May I ask why you're doing EOD the entire time? If it's because that's how high you and your SO's sex drive is- cool. If not, I would consider only doing EOD or every day during your fertile window and the rest of your cycle only occasionally- as the mood strikes. TTC puts a lot of pressure both on yourself, your SO, and your relationship. The romance and fun can be taken out of sex when you're TTC, don't put more unneeded pressure on yourself.

saladflambe · October 2015

Cycle 2 isn't really that long, so you're well within normal timeframes. You didn't do anything wrong. You just need to try again.

I temped, used OPKs, and used preseed. We had sex every other day during my fertile window.

goldie987 · October 2015

Like others said, you have a 20% chance of conception with perfect timing every month. If remember statistics properly, that means only 36% of women will conceive by 2 months, 49% by 3 months, 60% by 4 months, 67% by 5 months, 74% by 6 months, 80% by 7 months, 84% by 8 months, 87% by 9 months, 90% by 10 months, 92% by 11 months and 94% by 12 months. Just keep going at it and hope for the best.

Soverthis · October 2015

It can take a year for a healthy couple to conceive. Relax. I tried for 6 months then started using OPKs. At a year I saw the dr. After doing all kinds of testing we learned I am ok and my husband's sperm was way out of wack. He started fertility meds and after 2 yrs and 4 mo of trying we got a positive test last week. It can be a long road that you cannot prepare yourself for. All I can say is don't freak until you hit 12 months of trying. Stress is not your friend. And remember that coming of birth control throws your body out of wack. Give your body time to regulate. Also, as I understand it from over a yr on the infertility blogs, you do not need preseed unless you are not naturally created lubrication yourself during sex. If you need assistance to make things lubricated then less is more. Even with preseed. We took time during our long wait to learn new hobbies, get healthy, save $, pay off debt and spend time together. Good luck to you. I hope you get a poaitive soon.

Kmom2be · October 2015

Thank you to everyone! We are doing EOD because at cycle day 16 of 26 I still haven't O'd and last cycle I got a positive but unclear and didn't temp so I'm not exactly sure when I ovulate. My temp is very weird drop spike drop spike and then the past 6 days I had a drop to 96.6 then 3 consistent temps at 97.3 which is my normal and yesterday and today its spiked at 98.6. I'm wondering if that means I did ovulate but I've had negative OPKs all along. I ordered the Wondfos for next cycle but since it's unclear and in my fertile window I want to make sure we don't miss it. It's already getting stressful and causing arguments so fingers crossed I figure out my ovulation soon. Thank you again for great advice I'm going to start working on cleaning out the bedroom that will be the nursery to pass time!

lalala2004 · October 2015

Kmom2be said:
Thank you to everyone! We are doing EOD because at cycle day 16 of 26 I still haven't O'd and last cycle I got a positive but unclear and didn't temp so I'm not exactly sure when I ovulate. My temp is very weird drop spike drop spike and then the past 6 days I had a drop to 96.6 then 3 consistent temps at 97.3 which is my normal and yesterday and today its spiked at 98.6. I'm wondering if that means I did ovulate but I've had negative OPKs all along. I ordered the Wondfos for next cycle but since it's unclear and in my fertile window I want to make sure we don't miss it. It's already getting stressful and causing arguments so fingers crossed I figure out my ovulation soon. Thank you again for great advice I'm going to start working on cleaning out the bedroom that will be the nursery to pass time!

The women in TTGP are wonderful ladies. I check out their WTO and TWW threads, and they are great at helping you figure out your chart.

goldie987 · October 2015

I second @lalala2004, the TTGP women are amazing. The helpful information mixed with snarkyness always made my day.

Linsbins · October 2015

Third the suggestion to hang out on TTGP. They will teach you everything you need to know.

nlwz123 · October 2015

This isn't going to be very useful, but I did everything you had mentioned and then some (went to an RE and had the sperm analysis and consult), temped, used OPKs, checked CM, used preseed as a sperm friendly lube, sex EOD during my fertile period, and it still took me 7 months. The fact of the matter is that most couples don't conceive right away--that doesn't mean that anything is necessarily wrong. Keep at it.

Edit: You can see in my chart, the cycle we conceived we actually only had sex 4 times. We didn't have to go at it every other day for the whole cycle. It was just timed right and we got lucky.

delujm0 · October 2015

Everything above is what I would say. It took us 4 months with temping, OPKs, checking CM, and EOD sex until confirmed O. And I consider myself really lucky that it happened so fast. I have plenty of friends that have tried for much longer, have had losses, and have needed to see REs before ultimately getting pregnant. Stay positive and hang out on the TTGP board, those ladies are awesome.

Also, a note: preseed will NOT help you get pregnant. If you already use lube normally, you should use preseed because it won't kill sperm like other lube does. But it does absolutely nothing to enhance sperm, or make you pregnant faster. We don't use lube normally, so it would have been a waste of money to buy and start using preseed.

SisterMaryNapalm · October 2015

You're doing everything you can, it sounds like. I will second PP that impatience is not your friend. 2 cycles is not very long at all and while I remember for me, that was when I started getting impatient or worried, keep it in perspective. The ladies on TTGP were a life saver at that point and I would look at getting a hobby (that's a serious suggestion- no snark!). Good luck

Bigboobsmcgee · October 2015

DustyMelons said:

Kmom2be said:

Hi Everyone, congrats! I can't wait to graduate to this board. I'm in cycle 2 of seriously trying and went off the pill in late July. I've been regular my whole life on and off pill so I thought it would happen right away. We had intercourse EOD and a few days in a row during my fertile window and I got a positive OPK. But AF came and it was awful. This cycle I'm on day 15 and was supposed to ovulate last week but have gotten negative OPKs. I'm using FF and Ovia as apps and temping and OPKs. We are also doing EOD the whole cycle and have done every day a couple times. We are also using Preseed. We did an at home sperm test which came back normal. I am very fit and healthy. I have been on prenatals for 4 months. Hubby is overweight but his family is very fertile. I am looking for your best advice. Was there a food you ate, trick you used? What worked? Thank you!

Patience. As PP stated, it can take a healthy couple up to a year to conceive.

You're literally on your second cycle TTC, take a breath and just continue to do what you have been. Temping and charting are the best things to do to find your fertile window.

May I ask why you're doing EOD the entire time? If it's because that's how high you and your SO's sex drive is- cool. If not, I would consider only doing EOD or every day during your fertile window and the rest of your cycle only occasionally- as the mood strikes. TTC puts a lot of pressure both on yourself, your SO, and your relationship. The romance and fun can be taken out of sex when you're TTC, don't put more unneeded pressure on yourself.

ALL of this.

Bigboobsmcgee · October 2015

Kmom2be said:

Thank you to everyone! We are doing EOD because at cycle day 16 of 26 I still haven't O'd and last cycle I got a positive but unclear and didn't temp so I'm not exactly sure when I ovulate. My temp is very weird drop spike drop spike and then the past 6 days I had a drop to 96.6 then 3 consistent temps at 97.3 which is my normal and yesterday and today its spiked at 98.6. I'm wondering if that means I did ovulate but I've had negative OPKs all along. I ordered the Wondfos for next cycle but since it's unclear and in my fertile window I want to make sure we don't miss it. It's already getting stressful and causing arguments so fingers crossed I figure out my ovulation soon. Thank you again for great advice I'm going to start working on cleaning out the bedroom that will be the nursery to pass time!

Can I just say that I don't think this is a very good idea I wouldn't buy anything or do any baby prep until you get a BFP.

Just try to be patient. I did everything you are doing and it took me 1.5 years to get pregnant with my first, then very little trying and got pregnant with my 2nd after 4 months. Patience is key and TRY to relax!

GoatSnakeMouse · October 2015

FWIW I never had a lot of luck with OPKs. On the months I got my BFP I never got a positive - but obviously I ovulated.

ijstarr28 · October 2015

DH and I are pregnant. Very early on so I hope everything goes well. It didn't take us long, but I have read that lube can make a difference. I did my part by listening to audio books. Romance audio books. I think it helped by being ready without any saliva or ky.

This is in addition to everything everyone else said!

jessdes15 · October 2015

Definitely temp and chart! And remember, even for fit, healthy fertile people, there's still only a 1:5 chance of conceiving each month. My first pregnancy was conceived from 1 occurrence, outside of the fertile window (weren't ttc). That one sadly resulted in mmc, but after a 3 month break we started trying again. Straight after a pregnancy is supposedly when you're at your most fertile. Even as fertile as we apparently were, it still took us 3 cycles this time round. Chin up and be patient! Or you'll drive yourself crazy!!!

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