Baby hates being held by husband

kim505 · October 2015

Anytime hubby holds the baby, LO starts to fuss and cry despite hubby's efforts to calm and soothe him. As soon as I hold the baby, he calms down automatically. I feel bad for both and it makes it hard to get a break! We've tried having hubby do the 5 S's, babywear, etc. Anyone else have this issue and/or suggestions?

tracij12 · October 2015

Is he nervous/tense? We had this problem for a few days with DD1 b/c DH was not a baby guy and was so nervous holding her (he's a pro now!!).

Try having him drape one of your shirts or a blanket you've snuggled over himself as he holds so baby has comfort of your scent.

I am sure it totally bums your husband out but it with certainly pass!!

delujm0 · October 2015

Can you try leaving the area? Honestly, my husband's relationship with LO got so much better once I went back to work and he became 100% in charge of her in the mornings, because I wasn't there to fall back on. They both got more used to each other within days and LO lights up now when she hears or sees him in the room. Can you maybe leave a bottle and go to the grocery store or something, leaving them home together every so often? In my experience, if I'm in the house, DH always had a reason to bring the baby to me when she was crying for him. But if you remove that fall back, he'll be forced to find a way to soothe the baby himself. It will probably be different than the way you soothe LO, but that's ok as long as it works!

gemmafig · October 2015

i had to walk away and let him figure it out. Initially, I'd just scoop her up from him and calm her down, but he pointed out that I wasn't giving him a chance to figure it out. So, I go do something else and when he feels like he's given it his all he comes to me and asks for a switch. Now, though she loves her Daddy and gives him way more smiles and coos then she gives Momma!

TabulaRasa25 · October 2015

My husband and our baby got in on the skin-to-skin time from our hospital stay on. My husband usually will usually take him and tuck him inside his fleece robe in the mornings when he gets up and has his morning coffee and reads, after I've fed the baby, which is when I can go pump and take a shower. We call it "robe time," it's like being swaddled or in a wrap-style carrier for him. It's a nice bonding time for them, and since baby's just fed, he's not ordinarily cranky.

My husband also has him solo for about 4 hours a night, three nights a week, while I am at school. It's been good for them to establishe their own routines that are different than the "mom and me" routines.

PlainJane8350 · October 2015

He's probably just nervous. My husband used to fidget with our baby the entire time he held her! It annoyed me just watching it. I kept gently reminding him to relax and let her relax and now I can hand her off or very rarely he can get her to fall asleep himself. Are you B.F? I think they just get comfortable and used to/rely on us at first. With that said, she still hates everyone else. My husband's out of town so I haven't showered in over a week despite other people's efforts. :P

valerie1132 · October 2015

My baby loves bathtime so my husband does this with her (2 months). Also, I know it sounds a little hokey but have you tried baby massage? She likes this too, so he does that as well. Yes she does cry more with him than with me, but these activities help him feel like she's not crying all the time with him. It's much better in the mornings, by the afternoons she cluster feeds and only wants me.

Want a personalized experience?

Baby hates being held by husband

Re: Baby hates being held by husband

Choose Another Board

Search Boards