Not ready to tell

salbb · October 2015

getting near the 12 week mark and close family and hubby eager to start sharing the news...
Still in throes (!) of MS and am tired of advice from few people who know already without adding rest of the world in
Anyone else feel like this? Baby is very much wanted but I am not doing jigs of happiness right now and can't deal with having to deal with other people's needs... If I have to hear 'hope you will start enjoying it soon' from anyone else that isn't puking daily I may need to relocate !!

Charla1224 · October 2015

I get this because I was a daily puker until Monday (thank God for Zofran). I'd just explain to your friends and family that you're not ready yet and that you'd rather wait until you feel a bit healthier to announce.

I was excited to announce because I was sick. I wanted to be able to tell people... Yay we're pregnant, but I'm not doing so well, so please give our family the space, time, prayers, and support we need at this time.

salbb · October 2015

thanks for advice! Hopefully scan next week will perk my miserable face up!!!
Don't know how to gif otherwise I would add a grumpy ol cabbage!

EricaEly · October 2015

This is my second and have only told close family and a select few at work. Other than that I really don't feel like telling anyone. I like having a secret:) I'll probably tell more people the farther along I get but right I don't care.

emilyj77 · October 2015

I think you would be right to wait, at least until you can share in others enthusiasm. I would hate for people to get the impression that I'm not excited about this baby, when I totally am. I'm just consumed with worry right now. And not feeling well. And exhausted.

Then again, maybe telling others will help me feel better, or at least sympathetic. DH is not the sympathetic type, so I've been going it alone the last 4.5 weeks.

mrstmoose · October 2015

We haven't told anyone other than my 2 best friends and my direct supervisor. We are telling our parents and sibling next Friday at 10 weeks. Do what you feel is right. It's your baby, not theirs.

laurenmdrn16 · October 2015

@emilyj77 I totally understand about not telling people until you are feeling better and can show more excitement. I slipped to some friends at church at our Christian Ed meeting and after the meeting one came up and whispered "Is everything ok? You seem really down about the pregnancy". She meant well, but it killed me to think that people thought I was not happy about being pregnant. I am, just also really sick, and tired, and anxious. I feel like once the holiday season starts up, I will hopefully be out of the woods regarding MS and (some!) worry, and the whole excitement of the season will get me going and more pumped to talk about the pregnancy.

The one thing that is really amping up my excitement is at bedtime when my son curls up in my lap, kisses my belly and says "Goodnight baby sister, Luna. I love you!" and then adds in his prayers "And thank you God for the baby in mommy's body." and whispers with a smile and a side-glance at me "Baby sister!" (I keep reminding him it could be a baby brother, but he is 100% convinced he is getting a baby sister named Luna and actually gets mad when I suggest calling the baby his brother!)

Kennedy0830 · October 2015

I can relate, too! We told extended family last night (we are 11w2d) and I just got uneasy about it. I'm not one to shout from the rooftops so I had DH do all the calling. I messaged a few family members but I'm awful at being an overly excited person. I am very excited to be pregnant and I love enjoying this time with DH and I, but don't want to open the floodgates to getting unwanted advice (which we have gotten some already).

I want to enjoy this with DH and that's it. Now that family knows I will have to put on my fake face and play into the craziness

camillaandcarson · October 2015

I am also feeling really sick all day long. Baby is very much wanted and celebrated however I don't feel like telling everyone until I feel a bit better.
Dh is ready to tell but respects that I am just not ready to announce. Super close friends and close family already know so I don't feel a rush.

gingerbride26 · October 2015

Yea it's a tough balance. I'm 11 weeks now. We ended up telling patents at 6 weeks because we were going to Disney with other family at 7 weeks and knew it was going to be obvious when I wasn't going on rides or drinking and was green and cranky. Since then we've told best friends on both sides and a couple people at work because I've a crap poker face and I've been crazy sick at work in the mornings. I told my boss yesterday because we're close and he actually told me is too early to tell people (he had a tragic loss of one twin many years back) and I half agree. I know statistically we're mostly out of the woods but until that ultrasound I'll be nervous.

proudparent2b · October 2015

My husband started telling everyone early. I wanted to wait until 12 weeks. Ah well...

blaisdew · October 2015

*loss mentioned*
I understand you completely. I've been so sick, and honestly just not that excited to tell people. We had a loss in July that was extremely hard and a lot of people knew, since I was 12 weeks at the loss. I'm 12 weeks this Saturday and I am SO excited about the baby but don't feel comfortable telling people or really celebrating until at least a few more weeks go by. Part of me is so excited to show and be in second trimester and just really enjoy pregnancy, and the other part just wants to hide it from everyone because I don't want to disappoint anyone with another loss.

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