Is it just me? Or do I have a right to feel that way? — The Bump
Families and Friendships

Is it just me? Or do I have a right to feel that way?

Rant!! My moms boyfriends mom is constantly claiming my son as her grandson, I have absolutely NO CONNECTION WITH HER OR HER SON. My mom has been with him for 2 1/2 years I've never cared for him he's a manipulative fat slob. I've never met this woman and she's posting it on Facebook now I have his family adding me thinking we're family. She's constantly telling me she loves me and my son and she's just making me feel uncomfortable my son isn't her or her sons family It's annoying I don't like people claiming my son as theirs it offends me greatly. Sorry rant over): call me a b*tch but it's just very annoying. She claims she's coming down for the baby and wants to be in the delivery room just no absolutely not.
BabyGaga

Re: Is it just me? Or do I have a right to feel that way?

  • oceanchildoceanchild member
    edited October 2015
    you have a right to feel any way you wish. but maybe his mother is trying to reach out and make a connection bc she loves your mom too, or bc she knows that your mom is a special person to her son, or bc her son is manipulative and crappy (i don't believe you should attack his physical appearance however) to her as well, and she is looking for someone to accept her love in a way that he doesn't, or any number of things that you can't know, since as you point out you don't know her. maybe is this her only chance at having any great grandchildren? or she is recovering from something and reaching out to others and creating healthy bonds is part of her recovery? a lot of programs are like that, and you wouldn't want to be unkind (and not saying you have been). i would absolutely feel uncomfortable with the shower of affection (esp since you haven't met her!) and i would definitely not have her anywhere near my delivery. but it sounds like maybe she is just really excited for you and really wants to share her love. as for the random people trying to add you on facebook, i would just leave them in friend request limbo - they will never know. it isn't like "denying" them. and if you don't want to delete/block your mom's bf's mother (why did you even add her in the first place, or is she doing this and you aren't friends?), i would change my privacy settings so that she cannot share your photos (or even your mom can't if that is where she is getting them from) or maybe add her to a restricted list so that she cannot see all your posts? if you delete or restrict what ever photo has been shared, the posts will no longer show up on the people's walls who have shared it. hopefully they haven't saved it. maybe you can sit down with her and talk, or talk to your mom about the boundaries? if this is a person that is going to be staying in your mom's life, it would be great if you can have a good relationship. i mean, yay for extra great-grandmas! some kids don't even have one. good luck; sounds like a stressful situation

    edited for grammar

    March 2016 siggy: babies - expectation vs reality

    Brian's Whovian wife (5/'09) 
    AP, BF, BW, CD, CLW, CS, ERF, Catholic mama 
    to Evan (7/'10), Clare (8/'11), Dean (3/'14), ^F(12/'15)^, Rose (3/'16)
    *no longer a Timelord ~ WibblyWobbly BabyWaby is here!*
    <3 but i still feel bigger on the inside <3
     Autism mama! 
  • oh just saw your similar post in our BMB and that answered a lot of my questions ... hopefully things work out with you guys!

    March 2016 siggy: babies - expectation vs reality

    Brian's Whovian wife (5/'09) 
    AP, BF, BW, CD, CLW, CS, ERF, Catholic mama 
    to Evan (7/'10), Clare (8/'11), Dean (3/'14), ^F(12/'15)^, Rose (3/'16)
    *no longer a Timelord ~ WibblyWobbly BabyWaby is here!*
    <3 but i still feel bigger on the inside <3
     Autism mama! 
    smount2011
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