Mothers in the Delivery Room?

fourtsixand2 · October 2015

I proposed the idea of my Mother joining my husband and I in the delivery room and he said he thought that was a very good idea (they get along very well). I started to think that my sister had all the children she was going to have, and I would be giving my parents their last grandchild (unless I decide to have a second child), and my Mother had never been in the room when my sister delivered.

I think it would be an incredible thing for her to be a part of, but before I bring it up to her, are there any 'red flags' or issues anyone has had (or foresees) with mothers or additional people being in the delivery room (besides significant others)? My husband has very bad anxiety, but oddly enough I think she might be a good 'calming force' for him...

VegetaElPrincipe · October 2015

If they get along well and he agrees she should be there, I don't see an issue. Just check with your hospital about their policy in regards to people in the delivery room with you. Best of luck.

flas · October 2015

I had my mother there for my first baby and my MIL there for my second (she and I get along and since she only had sons she had never seen one of her grandchildren born) they were both very happy for the experience and were never in the way. They were very helpful. If your mom is high strung or has high anxiety I might say no, but she could be a big help to you and DH.

stephaniearthurs · October 2015

I think As long as you both agree and are good with it, it could be a great support! I'm not going to have my mom there during delivery because I'm actually not comfortable with her seeing me super naked! She will be there during labor and then after we have the baby and hubby and I bond (skin to skin) then she can come in and see the baby! I haven't told her this, so hopefully she understands!

hanalock · October 2015

I had both my mum and my partner in the delivery room with my son. Now while I love my partner very very much I am so glad I had my mum there.
1 because she helped to keep me calm when I got a bit worried and partner wasn't sure what to say or do
2 because I ended up being rushed to theatre after having my son because I tore badly (don't mean to scare you) and she helped keep my partner calm haha.
I loved having them both with me x

Bigboobsmcgee · October 2015

My mom was there for the births of both my children and it was awesome. She was thrilled and so was my husband because he couldn't cut the cords...she had to

If your husband and the hospital are on board with it then I think it's great. You are doing an awesome thing letting your mom have this fabulous experience as well.

jenbstevens · October 2015

My mom will definitely be there for my son's birth, along with my husband and hopefully my best friend. I can't imagine doing it without her.

fhopefaithlove1 · October 2015

Since my mom has passed away, I'm having my MIL , DH and SIL in there with me. My MIL has never experienced a birth, ever, ( she was never able to have children of her own and adopted 7 ) , she's REALLY looking forward to being there. And I'm pretty excited to have her experience the birth of her grand-daughter.

kitteh81 · October 2015

My DH also has some anxiety issues and having my mom in the room was a great calming force. She also really helped to direct him when he needed it. They have both been instrumental parts of both my previous labors, and they're both going to be there for this one.

At first I was not sure about having my mom there, because we had a pretty tense relationship when I was a teen. But during labor our dynamic reverted back to what it was when I was sick as a little kid. She was always a really nurturing caretaker in those situations, and that came out during my labors.

ammnam14 · October 2015

I don't know my hospitals policy but I plan to have my mom and husband in the room for sure. My mom has been there for all of her grandkids births. I haven't talked to my MIL yet so I'm unsure of if she wants to be there or not. If not , visitors are allowed 24hrs a day so they can just wait in the waiting room.

susanb15 · October 2015

My mom and my husband will be tag teaming during l&d. Husband and I are both okay with him being gone for a lot of the delivery (for a lot of reasons), and mom and I are close. As pp said, see hospital policy and see how comfy she is / when she would want to come in or out if at all.

ashleyhenton83 · October 2015

I found that having an extra person in there exept for your dh could be good because they can trade off helping you and not get too tierd

nickilynn0516 · October 2015

My mom saw my son being born, It was not planned. Just kinda happened. When you are about to push you do not care who sees your privates. you just want the baby out.

cataleya82 · October 2015

My mom watched the birth of my firstborn, but with my second I wanted nobody in there and gave birth alone, I plan to give birth alone again this time. It actually gives me anxiety thinking about someone besides Drs watching my baby be born.

cataleya82 · November 2015

BostonTerrior2008 said:

cataleya82 said:
My mom watched the birth of my firstborn, but with my second I wanted nobody in there and gave birth alone, I plan to give birth alone again this time. It actually gives me anxiety thinking about someone besides Drs watching my baby be born.
Not even your SO?

I'm single, but if I weren't then I would have my SO in there.

taysun · November 2015

My mother will be in the hospital the whole time and we've discussed that I may or may not want her in the room. I often find her stressful to be around and she understands that I might decide I don't want to be dealing with her or that I might want her in the room only to ask her to leave.
Do whatever makes you and your SO happy and comfortable.

teachmegs817 · November 2015

Both my MIL and mom told me that they don't want to be in the room when I give birth. MIL is a very private person and thinks that it's an experience for my husband and I to share together. My own mother walked away from the booth where I got my ears pierced at 12 years old, because she couldn't stand to see a needle going through my ear, lol. She said she'd probably faint at the sight of blood/seeing me in pain so I said it was probably best for her to be in the waiting room =P, haha. As PP mentioned, I'd check on the hospitals policy and if it's allowed to have more than 1 person in there, then go for it. It sounds like she'd be a good asset to have in the delivery room with you and for your husband.

bublesmiled · November 2015

I had my mother in the room the first time. I love my DH, but he's not a strong person and I needed my mother to be able to get in my face if I got worried - she told me that everything was fine and to do what I was there to do. My dh wouldn't be able to say that in a forceful yet nice way. This time I'm a little nervous because my mom moved out of state for work, so it's only going to be me and DH. I think if your SO is comfortable, it's nice to have another loving force there. I think no matter how old we get, if something is off, we always like to have moms around. I also know that it was a very special moment for my mom and she talks about it often, now she's upset because she won't be here this time around.

Kiek · November 2015

My husband deployed right before DD was born so I had my mom and my MIL in the room with me. As much as I would have loved having DH there, two moms is a pretty great substitute. They both were able to help me in different ways throughout in ways that only mothers and women that have done this before can. When I came time to push my MIL held my hand and stroked my head while my mom literally watched my daughter burst forth into the world lol. honestly, once the pushing starts, Santa could walk into that room and I wouldn't care. You get in the zone and just want the baby out. All that to say, this time it will just be me and DD. Since he missed our first, he wants to have this moment with our second without any "distractions". I left that decision up to him since I don't really mind either way.