This was so weird

stephaniearthurs · October 2015

Ok, so my hubby and I are taking a birthing class this weekend! I was super excited, because as a FTM Labour and delivery is what I'm most anxious about.

Well... A lot of what she said was pretty common sense (although hubby learned a lot). The videos she showed were good, and I know what I'm expected to do (this sounds weird, but i get anxious in situations in which I don't know what to do) in terms of working through Labour.

This being said, she brought up a few things that I felt were very biased and unproven opinions. She (even through she was a nurse) seemed to be completely against any medical intervention. I understand that there is a tendency to lean towards things that are unnessasary, but she didn't even bring up the fact that it could be life saving.

Same with formula. Yes breast is best, but some women can't. And I know formula is man made, but it has saved babies lives, and women shouldn't be shamed for using it if they can't breast feed.

She also talked about women not breast feeding any more, as if no one does it! I understand that it was on the decline, but just because you don't see it, doesn't mean it doesn't happen.

But this was the kicker! She claimed that there is a link between the rise of formula, and the rise of child abuse! I actually did a quick Google search, nothing in depth, but couldn't find even anything remotely close to what she was talking about!!

They may have happened at the same time, but I would argue that child abuse became less acceptable/more reported at the same time that formula was invented.

Gah! I'm it saying I know everything, but I think she may have gone into this class not completely prepared.

RSB1982 · October 2015

That does sound weird. Our instructor showed us natural childbirth videos, but made it very clear that 90% of women choose some type of pain management and went over our options with us. She was a big breastfeeding advocate and come to think of it I don't remember formula being discussed.

The formula/child abuse comment is super weird. Sounds like the class was at least entertaining!

newmanmini · October 2015

Where are you taking this class? I would definitely state my concerns to someone in charge. If it was at a hospital and that hospital has been accredited as "baby friendly," they are really not allowed to promote formula or bottle feeding in the hospital. They can be pretty militant about breast feeding at baby friendly hospitals. So perhaps that was a factor. Still, there is a way to communicate hospital perspectives in a way that is more professional, nonjudgmental, and neutral. Hopefully, you learned some helpful stuff, too.

breezypip · October 2015

That is super weird! We had our class last weekend and our instructor/nurse was almost the opposite. She told us about her three personal birth stories and praised her epidurals to no end. When she asked if anyone in the class of 20 was planning an unmedicated childbirth, no one except one girl and me raised their hands (half hand raised here because ideally I'd like to but I have to shame in giving in). It made me feel like maybe I'd be crazy to even attempt it.

But no crazy opinions were shared and I didn't sense any judgement. Sounds like you got an opinionated nurse there!

stephaniearthurs · October 2015

newmanmini said:
Where are you taking this class? I would definitely state my concerns to someone in charge. If it was at a hospital and that hospital has been accredited as "baby friendly," they are really not allowed to promote formula or bottle feeding in the hospital. They can be pretty militant about breast feeding at baby friendly hospitals. So perhaps that was a factor. Still, there is a way to communicate hospital perspectives in a way that is more professional, nonjudgmental, and neutral. Hopefully, you learned some helpful stuff, too.

It was the hospital I will be delivering at! I'm hoping tomorrow, we will be able to give some feedback, if not will try and email someone. I don't THINK she meant anything by it. And I think tomrrow she will go over the basics of a c-section and other medical interventions, so I will see if she talks more about how important they are.

I guess I expected that she would talked about all sides, in order to make us more informed! I worry about some people who hear this, then need to be induced or need a c section, but fight or are terrified because it's unnatural. I've done my own research, but I'm a naturally critical thinker so that helps me.

I'm hoping it's more that she's scatterbrained and just sort of forgot to mention that sometimes they are nessicary. She didn't have any notes or slides or anything.

She also states that the c section rate in the US is 60%. Which I thought was insane, so I wanted to read more about its. The only info I could find, was in 2013 it was 32.7% according to the CDC. Which is trill high, but not 60! I could still be wrong about that!

I think my pessimism got the best of me today!

stephaniearthurs · October 2015

I should add the class was free, and I did get some things out of it! The videos were good, and I liked seeing the different Labour and delivery positions that are possible! And my husband learned a lot about the basics of child birth and I think he's going to be a great partner!

Also, when I came down to the medical, no option parts, she seemed very knowledgeable

angetralala · October 2015

breezypip said:

That is super weird! We had our class last weekend and our instructor/nurse was almost the opposite. She told us about her three personal birth stories and praised her epidurals to no end. When she asked if anyone in the class of 20 was planning an unmedicated childbirth, no one except one girl and me raised their hands (half hand raised here because ideally I'd like to but I have to shame in giving in). It made me feel like maybe I'd be crazy to even attempt it. But no crazy opinions were shared and I didn't sense any judgement. Sounds like you got an opinionated nurse there!

I had the same experience, on a smaller scale - six couples and I was the only person who raised my hand to say I had no interest in receiving an epidural. The nurse pretty much told me that anyone who goes in thinking they don't want one will change their minds. I said if I'm audacious enough to trust my ability to raise a child, then I should be able to trust my ability to handle labor.

Court11152325 · October 2015

One of my very good friends is a L&D nurse at the hospital where I will deliver. Our birth class was 2 2 hour classes with videos and q&a. The first night basically totally advocated for natural labor. The second night talked about all the different medical interventions, but was done so in a way to remind you that medical intervention is a slippery slope to c-section. My friend was surprised their videos had that view because a vast majority of women do get epidurals and this hospital has a very high c-section rate (fortunately my doctor doesn't!). With this hospital being our only choice and after talking to my friend who said, "if you want natural, hire a doula." We did just that. Apparently the nurses hate working with women who won't take epidurals and most doctors aren't supportive either.

So long story short, the hospital here is totally opposite of the info we got in our labor class. I intend on laboring at home for as long as possible with our doula (assuming I can) and then going to the hospital.

nalanmay · October 2015

The link of formula and child abuse could be related to the lower income people who are less educated and get state assistance. They have multiple other stresses and unfortunately their stress turns to their children leading to child abuse...I have not seen the research but have witnessed that in my in home work with parents!

Gingermom15 · October 2015

nalanmay said:
The link of formula and child abuse could be related to the lower income people who are less educated and get state assistance. They have multiple other stresses and unfortunately their stress turns to their children leading to child abuse...I have not seen the research but have witnessed that in my in home work with parents!

This was my thought, as well. Those in low socioeconomic status are more more likely to formula feed due to a combo of lower education and the need to return to work sooner, therefore formula is the easier choice as there is no pumping at work, milk doesn't have to be established and WIC helps provide the formula. Children in lower socioeconomic status are more likely to be abused or neglected largely in part to such a high stress home environment. I highly doubt there is a connection between just formula and abuse, though. Just that those two seem to coincide. A neglectful mother can still breastfeed and the perfect mother could use formula.

MillyDally · October 2015

I second that they usually talk about natural birth one night and medical intervention the next. However, she may have just misunderstood some numbers, or she was giving you numbers from where she works specifically. But 30% is still so high! Anyway, there might have been some miscommunication.
But I would also just keep in mind that she is just a person with her own biases. I personally think people who teach the classes should promote natural birth and breastfeeding as much as possible, because they truly are the best practices. And that is not meant to shame anyone, it just means that women should aim for natural birth and breastfeeding, but understand that medical intervention and formula are there if something doesn't go well.
The thing is, so many people opt for medicine, which turns into an epidural, which turns into a c-section, and any of these thing interrupt natural hormones which can make bonding and breastfeeding harder... Some women don't think they are strong enough for this, but women have been doing this for the entire history of humans, and have only used medicine and formula recently.

I may get some hate for this post, but I don't like that so many women think that anyone promoting healthy practices is shaming women who need medical intervention or who need formula. It's like saying that people who say people generally need to eat better and get more exercise because it reduces heart disease and other health issues are fat-shaming.

mltarrio · October 2015

I agree with the PP about hospitals that are rated "baby friendly" being different in the way they discuss some of these things. I did my class yesterday, an all day affair catering to women who want natural childbirth. But it was at one of the best hospitals in the country for delivering a baby, and it has the "baby friendly" rating, which is apparently hard to come by. This hospital also has a 12% cesarean rate, which is basically unheard of. I didn't choose it for these reasons, it happens to be our local hospital where my midwives do deliveries. There was no mention at all of formula, and breast feeding was treated as the only option. The instructor focused on medication and intervention free birthing, but she did go through the options and reasons to use them.

It sounds to me like some of the information you were given is bogus, but some of it is just bias.

stephaniearthurs · October 2015

Today, she talked about medical interventions, and mentioned that it's our bodies and we should do what we want, and not let someone sway us one way or another. It was just a strange experience all together.

Today, I told her that to get the baby to move, when I might be worried, I drink cold water and lie on my left side(as per my Dr.'s instructions). And she didn't know this! I figured as a labor and delivery nurse she would.

However, as mentioned before, when it came to the technical stuff, She was knowledgable, and informative. I think maybe just a little unorganized some times!

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