December 2015 Moms

Co-sleeping question

Hey ladies,
   I have searched out board and I didn't find anything, but if you know of a thread, please link me. 

For those of you who have co-slept with your children in the past, or plan to do so in the future, what did you use? What I mean is, did you use a bassinet, bed sharing, a bassinet you can use while bed sharing...etc. How did it work out for you? Any tips on what to do and what not to do? Thank you in advance, and apologies if this was asked in the past. I couldn't find the info I was looking for. 
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Re: Co-sleeping question

  • With DS we had a pack n play with bassinet next to the bed. If he couldn't fall asleep otherwise I'd lay back in bed with him again my chest doing skin-to-skin until he fell asleep and then I'd transfer him to the pack n play. A couple times I fell asleep and just moved him over when I woke up and then I went back to sleep. Later we had issues with reflux and went into very different sleep arrangements for that.
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  • I co-slept with my daughter after she was about 4 months but it was just her and I in the bed. I've heard some pretty terrible stories about co sleeping and the mother/father rolling over and suffocating the baby or falling asleep while breast feeding and choking the baby. If you have a huge bed or it's just the two of you it's great bonding but please be careful.

    This time my husband insist on a bassinet. A really good friend of his had a baby pass away from SIDS so he's crazy about certain things (which I love/hate) about him because he insists that I get up out of bed to breast feed which is just not happening at 2 in the morning with no sleep so we will see but anyway we got a halo bassinet. It has a bunch of cool features and breathable sides.
  • We had DD in our room in the rock n play next to our bed. I will admit the 1st couple nights she slept on my chest because it was the only way she would sleep and hated the pack n play. But I really didn't want to bed share so we made the transition to the rock m play. She slept in our room for the 1st 12 weeks but I wanted to get her into her room before I went back to work. I wasn't aware of this before DD but babies are really loud sleepers. They grunt and make lots of noises so i think we all slept better when she moved to her room. But it was very helpful to have her in our room the first 12 weeks.
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  • We bed-shared straight away. DS would start the night in his crib (in my room) once he woke-up the first time he'd bed share the rest of the night.
    He's nearly 5 now & still crawls into bed with us on a nightly basis. For this reason I'll be doing things a little differently this time. Got a co-sleeper that attaches to the bed for the first 6 months- crib on the nursery after that.
    Co-sleeping is a god-send when you're waking up every 2-3 hrs to nurse!
  • My DD slept in bed with me and her dad. You would be amazed at how light you sleep when your baby is next to you. Most of the horror stories about cosleeping accidents are when one or both parents are impaired in one way or the other.

    This. I was shocked when my sister told me she bed shared with my nephew. But she said if you're rolling over your child while you're sleeping, there's another issue going on. She said its almost instinctual to not do so.

    Shit, if I accidentally fall asleep with my cell phone in my bed, I wake up if I feel myself about to roll over on it!
  • We bed share for the first 4 months or so. We started transitioning to a crib about the time my first started trying to roll over. It was about 6 months when he was fully in his own crib. You sleep extremely light when your little one is in bed with you... The mama instincts. Bed sharing is safe when done the right way. If you are going to have baby in bed do it safely, do it right! It's an amazing bonding experience, I can't wait to do it again!
  • My DD slept in bed with me and her dad. You would be amazed at how light you sleep when your baby is next to you. Most of the horror stories about cosleeping accidents are when one or both parents are impaired in one way or the other.
    This. I was shocked when my sister told me she bed shared with my nephew. But she said if you're rolling over your child while you're sleeping, there's another issue going on. She said its almost instinctual to not do so. Shit, if I accidentally fall asleep with my cell phone in my bed, I wake up if I feel myself about to roll over on it!
    I think this is really subjective. I am not a light sleeper and I toss and turn a lot. It may be "almost instinctual" to not roll over on your child but it happens as well as what PP said about blankets and pillows.

    We will be getting a pack n play that has bassinet attachments. I'm sure I'll bring DS in to the bed to nurse but want to make sure he gets back in the bassinet. This is both for safety reasons and the fact that I believe bed sharing is a really hard habit to break and negatively impacts a kid's sleep long term.
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  • I don't plan to co-sleep in the bed. I will be using my pack n plays bassinet, I plan to breastfeed so it will make it a little easier to have baby close, but my real reason is I don't feel comfortable having baby in another room until baby has neck control.

    I am a very sound sleeper but I definitely wake up if my dog moves funny in the night or even whimpers. I've heard that women biologically respond to higher pitched sounds during sleep because of babies needs.
  • My friend had always slept with her 6 month old on her chest. However, even with how light she sleeps, the baby has rolled off the bed before. Luckily, she keeps a pillow on the floor.

    And now she is having an extremely difficult time getting the baby to sleep when she isn't around. Even for naps, when she is out, her husband has a very hard time putting baby to sleep.

    I know I will want to, but I will try my very hardest to keep baby in the bassinet beside my bed.
  • Thank you for your responses ladies. Am I the only one confused between the rock n play napper and the rock n play sleeper? If the child isn't supposed to sleep in those overnight or long term, why are they marketed as such? I'm so confused. I keep reading opposing info. Help!
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  • Thank you for your responses ladies. Am I the only one confused between the rock n play napper and the rock n play sleeper? If the child isn't supposed to sleep in those overnight or long term, why are they marketed as such? I'm so confused. I keep reading opposing info. Help!

    I'm a FTM so no experience but the websites of those products say not to use as overnight sleepers.
    Maybe they're marketed as something to put your baby to sleep before moving them? I don't know.
    I know many moms have said their baby sleeps or has slept fine in them, but personally if that's not what they're made for than I'd be weary of using them as such.
  • @MercyC1130 yeah that's why I was confused. Their demo videos are like "here's the nap setting" and then "here's the sleep setting with 6 hrs of rocking and vibration for a goodnight sleep". But then says don't let them sleep in it overnight. It gave me a headache.
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  • Has anyone attempting using a positioner like this one?
  • sarahgn said:

    Has anyone attempting using a positioner like this one?

    Yes. We used this with our daughter. We loved it, we never worried about squishing her. I also think it made the transition easier to her crib because she still was in her own little space.
  • I have co slept with all 4 of my kids. The oldest is now 19. Here's what I've arranged for us. I do feel like this is a controversial subject with pros and cons on each side. It's a very personal choice for me and has allowed me to actually get rest at night. My almost 2 year old loves it too. This way baby has his/her space and I can nurse and quickly return to sleep.
  • So I went to buy buy baby a couple of hours ago and looked at cosleepers, bassinets and the rock n play stuff. I wish I had taken a pic of these stupid tags. They definitely said for 30 min napping and night time (6hr sleeping) -_-. I think I'm going to go with the pack n play with the bassinet and changer and just stop worrying about it.
    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
  • So I went to buy buy baby a couple of hours ago and looked at cosleepers, bassinets and the rock n play stuff. I wish I had taken a pic of these stupid tags. They definitely said for 30 min napping and night time (6hr sleeping) -_-. I think I'm going to go with the pack n play with the bassinet and changer and just stop worrying about it.

    Personally, I would say just go with what you think you'd get the best use out of. Most newborns don't sleep for that long at a time. Even formula fed babies wake up hungry or needing to be changed. DS certainly didn't spend more than 6 hrs in anything until he was almost as many months old, rolling over and sitting up and generally outgrown the product anyway.
  • blended10 said:

    We bed-shared straight away. DS would start the night in his crib (in my room) once he woke-up the first time he'd bed share the rest of the night.
    He's nearly 5 now & still crawls into bed with us on a nightly basis. For this reason I'll be doing things a little differently this time. Got a co-sleeper that attaches to the bed for the first 6 months- crib on the nursery after that.
    Co-sleeping is a god-send when you're waking up every 2-3 hrs to nurse!

    @blended10 this is the exact same here with my 6 yr old. I love her snuggles and have a very hard time making her go back to her own bed though. It's not like she will be a senior in high school wanting to sleep with me! Ha! But yes this baby will go straight back in the crib after nursing!
  • DD1 - Bedshared with me until she was 4, but I was also single so there wasn't anyone in bed but the 2 of us.
    DD2 - Roomshared with us until 7 months in a Pack & Play with Newborn Bassinet until she was 7 months old.
    DD3 - Will be roomsharing with us until a minimum of 6 months as per the SIDS guidelines given to us by our doctor and pediatrician.

    We found the Pack & Play with the bassinet the perfect height for being right beside the bed, but also for me recovering from a c-section.


  • So, this is obviously anecdotal, but I used to be able to sleep anywhere at any time, like a rock. After I had DD, that just disappeared. I became a total light sleeper, waking at her every move. I would start the night off with her in her Moses basket (like a bassinet), nurse her and put her back in the bassinet when I would go to bed, then bring her into my bed when she woke after that and side-lying nurse and sleep together until morning. I was actually pretty pissed off when she started sleeping through the night (crib at this point) and I would still wake up all the time (she was still in the room).
  • We had DD in a bassinet which she hated when she was first born so we moved her to a rock n'play. You're not supposed to use those for sleep over night but I didn't know that 2 years ago because everyone i knew was using it. She slept amazingly well for the first 4 months through it and was sleeping through the night around 6-8 weeks. When she was 5 months we moved her to the crib but then had to bring her back in our room since my mom came to stay with us and we often had her in our bed. She had trouble breathing so I was too scared to leave her anywhere by my side (we found out later that she had a blockage in her trachea). I will say that my husband was the heaviest sleeper before baby and now wakes up as soon as i move off the bed. So co-sleeping definitely changed him. She's 2 today and she mostly sleeps in her toddler bed, but we'll typically bring her in our bed around 6am for another hour or so of sleep and cuddles. There's no way I could have her in our bed throughout the night now though - she kicks and moves all around and neither my husband or I get any sleep. 

    So all that to say that if you do cosleep read about it and do what works for you. It works great for some people and it doesn't for others. For some of my friends it worked for a while and then when it didn't they just stopped. Co-sleepers like Arms Reach work great as a mid-co-sleeping solution. 
  • I had both of my kids in the Rock and Play next to my bed (the older one especially required an incline to sleep well so the Pack and Play was a bust) and after their first night waking I'd have them in bed next to me. I'd only have blankets/sheets going up to my waist and would wear a heavier shirt of some kind for warmth on my arms that I could pull out of the way to nurse but wouldn't be a hazard to the baby. Minimal pillows and the baby would be put even with my chest so they weren't anywhere near my pillows and I wound up instinctively curling around them to keep my much heavier sleeping husband away from them. If I was still awake when they finished nursing I'd try to transfer them back to the R&P but they woke up a lot from that. Once they were old enough to roll over I'd start them in their crib in their room for the first chunk of sleep, then bring them to bed with me. I night weaned sometime after a year (right at a year with my son, and around 18 months with my daughter) when they started insisting on being latched if they were in bed with me. I got much more sleep with them in bed with me and I was always quick to wake up to their needs. My first two were awful sleepers though so it was basically a matter of survival (and I tried to avoid it with my son, but after falling asleep holding him in a chair, I gave in, that's super dangerous)
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  • helen76d said:

    I have co slept with all 4 of my kids. The oldest is now 19. Here's what I've arranged for us. I do feel like this is a controversial subject with pros and cons on each side. It's a very personal choice for me and has allowed me to actually get rest at night. My almost 2 year old loves it too. This way baby has his/her space and I can nurse and quickly return to sleep.

    We have this same type of set up. We've been co-sleeping since DD came home from the hospital. She falls asleep happily in her crib in her own room for naps and bedtime but we love the snuggles and bonding and still bring her in our room every night. Before we had the crib attached to the bed we used a rock n play. For the most part though when she was a newborn DD slept on my chest. We followed all the co-sleeping safety rules, no big pillows, blankets etc and I'm a naturally very light sleeper. It was never an issue for us and we felt safest having her near, plus it made bfing a breeze and I felt pretty well rested.

    For the new baby we will have her co-sleep on the far opposite side of the bed from DH and DD. I have a pack n play and rock n play ready to go if needed but will likely just have her next to me and follow all safety rules again. There's a lot of research about baby being able to touch mom and feel/hear her breathing for at least the first 6 months for safety and bonding. I love it and couldn't imagine having a tiny baby far away or in a different room. It is a very controversial and personal issue though. Good luck!

  • Dr Sears has a lot of good information about co-sleeping. He spent a lot of time observing his wife & child co-sleep. It's actually a pretty amazing, natural thing to do. Here is a link to his tips: https://www.askdrsears.com/topics/health-concerns/sleep-problems/sleep-safety/cosleeping-safely
  • @blended10 I have moderate to severe sleep apnea, so your link was helpful with my decision to get a cosleeper rather than bed share.
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  • @ChiccoBeanz great! I'm so glad :)
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