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January 2016 Moms
failuretofly
member
Baby Pictures on Facebook
failuretofly
member
Hey Ladies, I have been thinking about this a lot lately. I am not sure if I want to be posting photos of babe on FB after he is born. Maybe one to announce and minimal afterwards if that. The problem is I am really nervous about my mom. She LOVES Facebook and is OBSESSED with posting multiple times per day. Recently she visited with her friends-kids-baby and posted 7 photos of him in one day! He is not even related to her! I just know when LO comes along she is going to want to post photos of him constantly and it makes me really nervous. In addition to this we went through a huge ordeal when I got married and she posted hundreds of my professional wedding photos to FB without my permission and it was a huge blowout between us after.
Has anyone thought about their social media policies related to baby? Anyone have any advice for my situation with my mom?
Re: Baby Pictures on Facebook
As for your mother, you need to establish a STRICT no-photos online policy. Explain to her very clearly your reasons (wanting to be the only one posting baby pics, being afraid of creeps or other scary stuff so that she really gets it and wants to comply). If you're comfortable, tell her she can "share" the photos of LO on her Facebook that you have posted yourself. Hopefully she abides but if you discover she does not...it might be a no-camera zone for your mother when she is around baby. Hopefully it doesn't come to something so extreme though.
If you don't want pictures of your baby online, then tell your mom. Put your foot down on this one, it is a matter of his safety and your comfort. If she can't follow your rule, be a hard-ass. Sounds like you already have issues with her respecting your wishes, but I'm sure she'll pay attention if you tell her that she won't get to visit with him if she does post pictures when you've told her not to.
Eta also I believe there have been a couple discussions about this, maybe try searching the board to see additional ideas.
DD - January 2016
I think the really important thing to keep in mind is that social media is here to stay and will be around for a very long time. It will be the norm for our kids. Photos you post of your kids now will likely still be hanging around social media when they are older. So I avoid posting anything that will embarrass my kids, and definitely no potty training stories or photos and no bath time photos which I see a lot of my friends do!
I also don't want to be the annoying mom who always posts about her kids! I do however have a private blog that my family can access where I share lots of photos and stories of my kids. It is fun to look back through the blog at all the memories and it is easy to keep my far away family updated without overloading facebook with my kid photos.
I don't post too often, and when I do, I try to make it meaningful. I agree with making sure to use "appropriate" pics. I'm amazed by how many bath time photos I see. I am going to try to keep it down to 1-2 per month. We have a lot of out of town family and use FB to keep up until we see them once a year. It has been great so far, but if it becomes a nuisance and people are posting our little guy, I will deactivate in a heartbeat. I hate drama!
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My hubby and I are currently living in a different country then our families and social media is the best way for our family to see the first few years of babies life!
We both have very secure facebooks, and I'm really not worried about something happening. I would probably make sure the location is turned off JIC, and I don't really like those bathtub potty pictures (those are ok for your own family memories but I don't think the world needs to see it!).
I do post an obscene amount of pictures of my cat, do I'm hoping i don't do the same of the baby.
My mom bought us a onesie that says "famous on Facebook"
Just as a heads up, even if you have the location off when you post a picture, there is data within the picture file itself that someone good with computers can use to see the location of where the pic was taking (vs where it was posted). There is a way to remove this data but I do not remember it.
My DH is a very private person, and when we
got married he was really upset when she put photos of us both on there. He doesn't like the thought of people he doesn't know, locally, knowing about our private little life. It makes him uncomfortable when strangers come up to us and say about seeing our photo's on my mums Facebook page!
My DH is now worried about what my mum will put on there about our boy! He doesn't want his whole life on the Internet, neither do I, so I'm going to have to sit my mum down and have a talk! It got really awkward when she put scan photos on there and announced to everyone we was having a boy, before we had had a chance to tell all our family members of our exciting news. All
of her facebook 'friends' saw pictures of our boy before my DH step dad did, and he was really upset.
I think being open and honest is the best way to go with our mums, I should have had the talk earlier really, but you live and learn. I know my mum will be a bit upset, but when our son is old enough, he can decide what parts of his life he wants to share with others on social media sites, I feel that is really important.
Good luck to you xxxxx
And while I'm ok with my dumb college pics being a part of FBs vast amount of data, I don't want my kids pics to be a part of that. 1 big hack/data breach to hold a billion dollar social media giant hostage would put all of my info I've shared at risk.
As much as we think we have control, even pictures posted on FB where you are the only viewer ("only me" privacy option) are now shared with you and Facebook and whoever manages their data. Social media isn't just some blank canvas that you paint your life on, it's a bank vault that you deposit information into.
_________
Not asking for, of course not. But even as a pp mentioned there is information tagged to photos regarding time & location. People can see or figure out when you're "usually at park abc or out at work with an empty house". I just believe in not making it easy (for the bad guys) lol. I know part of it sounds like paranoia. I've also had a past experience of a break in & know what cops look for etc. Also, there is the simple act of a screen shot. This is why snap chat or other programs pictures can exist somewhere forever. You might be innocent & your friends innocent....but you can't control every single one of your fb friends' privacy settings and a simple in law sharing a sweet picture can end up in a creepy person collection in an instant. Can you? There's no possible way. No thank you for me please. That's all. :-) I don't push my ideas or concerns on others at all, it's my perogitive and just trying to be pro-active. :-) to each their own, and it's my kid lol.
As to privacy, I have several very smart friends who don't post any pictures of their kids online. I respect their decision but I think it's kind of futile to try to keep your child's image private and off the internet.
I do feel strongly about naked pictures. Naked pictures of children are regularly stolen for pedophile sites and a private facebook page isn't much protection. All of our family knows not to post anything naked (we do have a couple adorable professional naked baby pictures framed on our wall because naked babies are amazing) online and we've never had a problem. While I love seeing them, I cringe when I see facebook friends post naked pictures of their kids. One posts regularly of her son who must be about 4. Adorable, but my mama bear senses start tingling.