Ugh

JujuBee42 · October 2015

I'm not sure where to start. I've wanted to be a mom all my life, now I'm going to be and I'm miserable. I hate being pregnant. I hope this doesn't effect how I feel about the little. My boyfriend and I haven't gotten along since we found out and it is making me more miserable. Add a Lyme flare-up to all this. I'm scared of miscarriage. I'm scared of everything. I don't feel like doing anything but cry. The SO has been supportive, but he is getting tired of it too. We can't talk to each other without getting into a fight and me in tears. I have severe depression and am pro'ly bipolar, at least that's how I feel. I just want to crawl into a hole. I'm 10 weeks now. I feel like I should be more excited than I am. I am having a hard time picturing it and that scares me. My SO and I dated briefly 8 years ago and just got together kinda as a fling-turned-serious thing. We were happy....until I got pregnant. Now things are a bit too real for both of us. I'm 34 and desperately want this baby. It's just so upsetting. I feel crazy.

saladflambe · October 2015

Would it be possible for you to see a therapist? I have felt quite similarly about my pregnancy and am really only doing as well as I am now because of my therapist's support... The right therapist can really really help...

Bluejay3030 · October 2015

I second seeking a therapist, especially if you have reason to believe you're bipolar.

I'd like to add that a lot of these feelings and emotional highs/lows are normal to a certain degree, but if you feel like it's too much to handle, talking to your OB and if you can, a therapist, could go a long way.

Luxani · October 2015

I'm having a lot of that as well. I have depression and bipolar disorder. I stopped my meds while ttc, and obviously am not taking them now. I feel so depressed everyday. A therapist would be nice, but I'm in a bad place financially. SO lost his job a month ago, so I'm the only one working (a job based on commission only, that is also somewhat seasonal... and guess what? It's slow season). I'm stressed every second of every day. I already work almost 50 hours a week, sometimes more, but we're struggling to pay bills and put food on the table, literally. The only thing that does help is talking to my closest friends about it. They usually make me feel a little better. But... still, I have that constant dread hovering inside.

kbrands7 · October 2015

I suggest therapy also. It has really helped both my husband who struggles with depression and me with my anxiety. We each see our own and then come to each other's appointments sometimes to keep approaching things as a team. Also, if therapy isn't covered by your insurance (I know this keeps some people from trying it) most hospitals do clinic hours at a discount (usually less than $25) with resident psychiatrists.

Htow89 · October 2015

My SO and I are going through the same thing. I was so excited the first day but now I can't stand him. We were happy and in love and now I just want nothing to do with him. It really makes me sad. We are engaged but I asked him if we could move the weddings back until after baby comes. I've always battled depression but have had no issues in almost a year with the help of a counselor and Prozac. I quit taking the Prozac about five months ago and was doing great. Then I got pregnant, which I've always wanted, but it wasn't what I expected. My first OB appt is Friday and I'm going to discuss with my Dr. some things I can do to help with this feeling. I would recommend the same for you and definitely talking to someone. If you can't afford to pay for a therapist right now, and of course depending on how comfortable you are with this idea, pastors will counsel for free.

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