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September 2015 Moms
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Mad at baby

lauramichelle58lauramichelle58 member
in September 2015 Moms
Well it's 5am here and we have yet to really sleep. Baby has been up basically all night and I'm feeling like the worst mom on the planet. I got mad at the baby because he kept knocking off my nipple shield, making it near impossible to feed him with his wild arms and squirming. I was not speaking kindly to him and now that he's sleeping peacefully, I FEEL SO GUILTY. Who gets mad at a 2 week old baby?! Where did my patience go?! Vowing to be a better a better mom tomorrow :(.
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Re: Mad at baby

  • htourvilhtourvil member
    I have been feeling the same way lately for the exact same reasons. I hate the nipple shield but am not able to get her to latch successfully without, especially at night. It's ok to be frustrated though. My mom told me that even though they are babies, they are still people and it's only normal that we get upset with each other from time to time. When my babe gets crazy and I am starting to lose it, I just lay her back down, take a deep breath, let her calm down and try again. Don't feel bad though. We are just doing the best we can and they are just doing what babies do! Hang in there!
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  • ReneeJ2011ReneeJ2011 member
    Around the 2 week mark I got really frustrated about 4 am when LO was screaming but wouldn't eat and kept knocking off the nipple shield. I yelled at him and asked him what the f*** his problem was? I then proceeded to slam my hands down on the bed in frustration and tell him I knew now why babies were so cute. Eventually he ate and I calmed down. I felt horrible and I apologized to him for like am hour. It does not make you a bad mom and that was just the first of many times when I've told him I now knew why babies were cute. We all get mad and frustrated, who wouldn't with a tiny human requiring all your attention, keeping you up all night l, and only screaming at you to tell you what they want.
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  • missliz53missliz53 member
    My lo is really struggling with acid reflux so she doesn't eat well and falls asleep while she's eating. She's on meds and we've tried everything we and the ped can think of to help her, but nothing is working. Tues morning after being awake with her for 2 hours, I was so frustrated that I was getting angry with her. Of course I felt horrible about it because she's just as miserable as I am and I feel so bad for her watching her struggle.

    You are definately not alone. The chronic sleep deprivation is miserable especially when combined with those damn hormones.
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  • LoveLee85LoveLee85 member
    The other day, on a daytime feeding, I had to put baby in rock n play and go relax for a minute(aka cry in frustration in the other room)....poor guy was so hungry, he must have knocked the nipple shield off 35 times in 5 minutes! He was so pissed he was screaming mad and rooting around, all while his arms and legs were all over. I was begging him to just relax and eat. The guilt of just having to put him down so I could cry in frustration was horrible! It made me feel ten times worse. After a few minutes he fell asleep. Those nipple shields suck ass BUT I couldn't feed my son without it! I hate being dependent on them.

    Also, we were out with family tonight, I had the clean nipple shield wrapped in a paper towel sitting inside diaper bag. Go home to feed baby at 9:45PM.....THE NIPPLE SHIELD WAS GONE!! I freaked, then remembered DH mom was messing in the diaper bag and must have thrown paper towel away thinking it was trash!!! I WAS LIVID! Thank God we live next to a Target, DH raced over for a new one before they closed at 10pm!! The whole time my poor baby screamed his head off, inconsolably, while I rocked him. I then proceeded to be furious that we HAVE to have this stupid nipple shield anyway! I can't tell you how many times I have 'lost' it in the daytime because it's clear! It blends in. That's exactly why it was wrapped in a paper towel. I never knew what guilt really was until I became a mom!
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  • millereliz13millereliz13 member
    I had the same thing happen, my little guy wants a pacifier to sleep but will spit it out and then get pissed that it is not in his mouth. Repeat this for two hours, I got really angry and told him to go the f the sleep. I felt so guilty that I cried. I was lucky my hubby took over for me so I could sleep.
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  • ReneeJ2011ReneeJ2011 member
    LoveLee85 said:

    The other day, on a daytime feeding, I had to put baby in rock n play and go relax for a minute(aka cry in frustration in the other room)....poor guy was so hungry, he must have knocked the nipple shield off 35 times in 5 minutes! He was so pissed he was screaming mad and rooting around, all while his arms and legs were all over. I was begging him to just relax and eat. The guilt of just having to put him down so I could cry in frustration was horrible! It made me feel ten times worse. After a few minutes he fell asleep. Those nipple shields suck ass BUT I couldn't feed my son without it! I hate being dependent on them.

    Also, we were out with family tonight, I had the clean nipple shield wrapped in a paper towel sitting inside diaper bag. Go home to feed baby at 9:45PM.....THE NIPPLE SHIELD WAS GONE!! I freaked, then remembered DH mom was messing in the diaper bag and must have thrown paper towel away thinking it was trash!!! I WAS LIVID! Thank God we live next to a Target, DH raced over for a new one before they closed at 10pm!! The whole time my poor baby screamed his head off, inconsolably, while I rocked him. I then proceeded to be furious that we HAVE to have this stupid nipple shield anyway! I can't tell you how many times I have 'lost' it in the daytime because it's clear! It blends in. That's exactly why it was wrapped in a paper towel. I never knew what guilt really was until I became a mom!

    My dog has eaten 6 nipple shields. One of the ones she ate was my last one and I noticed it at 10 30 pm. We suffered through the night with a bad latch and a fussy baby till target opened the next morning. Now when I buy them I buy target out (usually 3 at a time) I also have a case I put it in now and I always keep one in the Diaper bag and one for the house just in case.
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  • JessicaS0914JessicaS0914 member
    LoveLee85 said:
    The other day, on a daytime feeding, I had to put baby in rock n play and go relax for a minute(aka cry in frustration in the other room)....poor guy was so hungry, he must have knocked the nipple shield off 35 times in 5 minutes! He was so pissed he was screaming mad and rooting around, all while his arms and legs were all over. I was begging him to just relax and eat. The guilt of just having to put him down so I could cry in frustration was horrible! It made me feel ten times worse. After a few minutes he fell asleep. Those nipple shields suck ass BUT I couldn't feed my son without it! I hate being dependent on them. Also, we were out with family tonight, I had the clean nipple shield wrapped in a paper towel sitting inside diaper bag. Go home to feed baby at 9:45PM.....THE NIPPLE SHIELD WAS GONE!! I freaked, then remembered DH mom was messing in the diaper bag and must have thrown paper towel away thinking it was trash!!! I WAS LIVID! Thank God we live next to a Target, DH raced over for a new one before they closed at 10pm!! The whole time my poor baby screamed his head off, inconsolably, while I rocked him. I then proceeded to be furious that we HAVE to have this stupid nipple shield anyway! I can't tell you how many times I have 'lost' it in the daytime because it's clear! It blends in. That's exactly why it was wrapped in a paper towel. I never knew what guilt really was until I became a mom!

    This is why I get mad at people trying to be "helpful". Unless you know exactly what it is, don't throw my shit out! Stop messing with my stuff!! Would you go through a woman's purse and decide what stays and what goes? Ugh. Can you tell it's my hot button? I love that my family came to help so much, but I'm STILL rearranging my kitchen and closets back to the proper order.
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  • GrowingapepperGrowingapepper member
    I find myself getting frustrated too. And I start talking to baby in that angry tone and say things like what is your problem? Why won't you eat? Please stop crying. I feel horrible and guilty for being so frustrated and impatient. I'm starting to realize that talking to her like that actually gets her more upset and makes everything more difficult. So now when I find myself about to say something like that I force myself to start telling her how cute she is and how much I love her in a super happy tone. And it seems like it actually calms her down and gets her to latch or relax or whatever I'm trying to get her to do. Or maybe just forcing myself to sound happy actually makes me happier and more patient. You should try it!
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  • BoobopgirlBoobopgirl member
    I kept a lot of nipple shields around when I needed them. I kept them in little tiny ziploc containers. I had one for the living room one for the bedroom one for the diaper bag and usually at least one backup. I was so neurotic about losing one....
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Pregnancy Ticker
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  • theglitteredpterodactyltheglitteredpterodactyl member
    @Growingapepper so much this!

    I definitely have moments where I just want to set her down and walk away but definitely the angry tones don't help anything, not even me. It's not easy, but when all I want to do is yell I just take a deep breath and say something sweet to her in a singsong voice. Ive occasionally just cried afterwards while rocking her, but I force myself to say things to her sweetly and it always helps both of us regroup and calm down. Fake it till you make it!
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  • jessbruxanovaajessbruxanovaa member
    I know the feeling! Middle of the night I'll have LO in my arms screaming and kicking, squirming and moving his arms like crazy. He constantly knocks the shield off and Even scratches my nipple! Of course I get frustrated. And when I get frustrated I've noticed he gets even more mad. It's like he can sense my frustration and it upsets him even more. And like you I also feel bad. But who hasn't been through that? It happens. We're not perfect!
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  • troopersmomtroopersmom member
    edited October 2015
    @lauramichelle58 I'm going through this now. The last few days my little guy has the same- horrible smelling green poo diapers. He's very upset and probably in pain. He was fine up until last few days. I wanted to say thank you for posting this! Love the advise from the group and also very nice to know I'm not alone. Sorry to everyone going through this...

    @jessbruxanovaa my guy also does the arms out- screaming... scratching ... He's managed to scratch his face up and my chest and face. It sucks when it's like 3 am and you're so tired and baby is yelling and scratching :-/
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  • awells189awells189 member
    So not alone! My little guy is going through a growth spurt and I feel like I'm in booby jail. I am trying to not get annoyed that he is crying or nursing... That's about it lately.
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  • natbacknatback member
    You need to ask someone for help, it is not ok to treat your baby this way. Call someone to sit with the baby while you sleep. Do not take it out on your baby, it is not ok.
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  • mamaamjonesmamaamjones member
    It just makes me so happy that I am not the only one who is having to use a nipple shield!  Add the struggling with the baby knocking it off in the middle of the night (or anytime really, but the dark is the worst) or having to find one when you need to suddenly feed a hungry baby! 
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  • purdyonepurdyone member
    Just remember it's a learning curve. I've been the same way and mine is at 5 weeks now. I know the frustration. FTM here and DH just came down with a cold.

    I gave up on the nipple shield at 3 weeks. I met with a LC who showed me how to force my nip to come out (breast reduction damaged it).

    Also, get the book "go the F to sleep" it's a children's book technically, but has been my middle of the night amusement for the frustration times.
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