More special than running out of the bathroom yelling the news?! that's my plan! Last time I was at work when got BFP and wasn't going to see DH until dinner time- tried to hold out for in person but ended up just blurting it out over phone!
Well, we have this thing where every morning, after I temp, I get out of bed and go downstairs and make us each a coffee and bring it back upstairs to bed. Then we sit in bed, talking and sharing updates from facebook or whatever . . . and it's a mini-date every morning. I love it. SO . . . I ordered a mug that says "World's Greatest Dad" on it. When I get my BFP, it'll probably be first thing in the morning, so I'll bring his coffee in the mug and wait until he notices
Hopefully, he won't get so excited that coffee spills everywhere
Me- 39 (turning 40 in April), TTC for the first time ever (since Jan 2015), low ovarian reserve
Married 3/14/14 to my wonderful wife, but her sperm count is rather low
TTC with frozen donor sperm and science
7 IUIs, 7 BFNs. 2 IVF attempts, both cancelled and converted to IUI, both BFNs. Decided that my tired old ovaries are ready to retire. Next step- reciprocal IVF, using my wife's eggs, my uterus! fresh 5 day transfer (2 embryos) 4/17/17- BFP! Identical twins "due" 1/2/17 (but anticipated arrival sometime December)
With my son, I was one of those people that I now hate. You know the ones who get pregnant without trying and are shocked to discover the news. I got the call from the doctor's office at work. I called my husband immediately and said, "You aren't going to believe this."
With my son, I just walked from the bathroom to the bedroom and said "I'm pregnant" because I was in shock! This time, I have an iron-on thing that says "big brother" so I hope I'll take the time to make a t-shirt and let DH find out this way. But probably I'll just walk from the bathroom to the bedroom again. I can use the t-shirt for extended family. Haha.
The first time, DH told me to test because something he said made me cry and that usually doesn't happen. So he was there when I found out. The second time, I was emotional again and he told me to test and it was a BFN. Two days later I figured I'd test to confirm I was out for the cycle and it was a faint positive. I was in disbelief for an hour and then I looked at the test again and decided it was definitely positive and I told him.
Since I've had two losses, one just a week after the BFP, I'm torn about whether to tell DH right away next time. I can't decide. I don't want to test before AF anymore. I'd rather skip the highest risk part and find out when there is a slightly better chance of it sticking. I had a MMC at 9 weeks with the first one, so I know I can't skip the entire risky time, but the risk is so much higher at first. And even though I'll know when I miss AF, DH won't know. I could give him some more buffer time if I wanted.
I can't figure out which is worse -- getting his hopes up a third time and losing it, or telling him I lost it after the fact. Maybe I should just ask him. Now that I've written all this, I think that's what I'll do.
TTC#1 since Jan 2015 BFP 2/19/15 • MMC found at 9 wks • D&E at 11 wks (age 36) BFP 8/29/15 • CP (age 37)
BFP 11/18/15 • DD born at 41 weeks (age 37/38)
TTC#2 since May 2017 BFP 10/18/17 • MMC found at 8 wks • Misoprostal at 10.5 wks (age 39) BFP 2/16/18 • CP (age 39) BFP 4/13/18 • CP (age 39) BFP 5/07/18 • MMC found at 10.5 wks • D&E at 11.5 wks • Testing showed it was a girl with Trisomy 22. (age 39/40) 9/5/18 Diagnosed with diminished ovarian reserve (4-5 follicles, one ovary had none and was very atrophied) RE says the low egg count is likely causing my recurrent pregnancy loss. Less eggs results in more aneuploidy. BFP 9/24/18 • CP (age 40)
BFP 5/11/19 • Fraternal twins • MMC found at 10w5d (Baby A 6w, Baby B 10w) • Misoprostal at 11 weeks (age 41)
The first time I was completely shocked because we weren't actively trying and I had PCOS and didn't think it could happen that easily. I just stumbled into the bedroom, still holding the stick, not believing the results and woke up my H (I tested super early in the morning). The second time I got a call from the doctor - again surprised since we weren't trying that month either (but of course not preventing). I'd gone to the Dr. because I was having really bad cramps and was super dizzy and she called and told me I was pregnant! H was at work so I had to wait all day to tell him. Sadly neither of those times resulted in a full pregnancy so now I just don't know what to do if/when I get another BFP. Like @CarrieandRoy I don't know if it's better to tell H right away or to wait until I know it's going to stick. I once had this idea of making a little scavenger hunt, with clues and everything, and then the +test at the end of the hunt. I still think that would be a lot of fun.
ME: 36 (PCOS), DH: excellent SA NTNP since 11/12, actively trying since 8/14
m/c @ 7w (4/22/14), m/c @ 6w (11/19/14) 11/15: Letrozole, Ovidrel, TI = BFP!!! Beta #1(14dpo)=349, Beta #2(18dpo)=2,805 12/17/15: Got to see the heartbeat (105bpm)! 1/25/16: NT scan = normal (HB=163bpm) EDD: 8/10/16 8/8/16: Baby boy born @ 12:25am, 8lbs, 20.5 inches 5/18/17: BFP!!! (11dpo) Beta #1(12dpo)=176.4, Beta #2(15dpo)=607.1
For me, a healthy 8-week ultrasound with the baby measuring on track is the new BFP. That's when I'll know I'm pregnant.
TTC#1 since Jan 2015 BFP 2/19/15 • MMC found at 9 wks • D&E at 11 wks (age 36) BFP 8/29/15 • CP (age 37)
BFP 11/18/15 • DD born at 41 weeks (age 37/38)
TTC#2 since May 2017 BFP 10/18/17 • MMC found at 8 wks • Misoprostal at 10.5 wks (age 39) BFP 2/16/18 • CP (age 39) BFP 4/13/18 • CP (age 39) BFP 5/07/18 • MMC found at 10.5 wks • D&E at 11.5 wks • Testing showed it was a girl with Trisomy 22. (age 39/40) 9/5/18 Diagnosed with diminished ovarian reserve (4-5 follicles, one ovary had none and was very atrophied) RE says the low egg count is likely causing my recurrent pregnancy loss. Less eggs results in more aneuploidy. BFP 9/24/18 • CP (age 40)
BFP 5/11/19 • Fraternal twins • MMC found at 10w5d (Baby A 6w, Baby B 10w) • Misoprostal at 11 weeks (age 41)
I've never experienced a bfp so I'm not sure what I will do for my dh. For my mom though, I bought a faberge(sp) egg necklace that is like a Russian doll that opens two times to represent her, me, and my little one. I got it in 2006 and can't wait to give it to her one day. Probably need to think of something nice for the dh..haha
Funny story. With my DD, I randomly took a test, knowing I wasn't pregnant because we'd had AWFUL timing, and it was positive! I freaked out for a bit and then got the big sister t-shirt on the dog and the stick in hand, ready for him to walk in the door so I could do this big reveal. I heard the garage door open, so I went out to the garage, all excited to share the news. And I realized he wasn't alone. He had the teenager he was mentoring at the time with him! He saw me, I said HI and then slammed the door, grabbed the pee stick and the dog and ran upstairs. I whipped off her shirt, threw down the pee stick and went downstairs, figuring I'd wait till later. Then I couldn't wait, asked him to come upstairs with me for a minute and basically tossed him the pee stick, showed him the shirt I had for the dog, and cried. HAHA! It was pretty comical.
This time, he knows when I have betas so no secret there. I usually call him right away to tell him it's negative, so if I don't call, he'll know something's up.
*** Child & current pregnancy mentioned ***
Me - 41 (PCOS), Hubby - 43 (healthy)
7/2013 - Sweet baby girl born (Clomid + TI)
3/2014 - TTC #2, return to RE 7/2014
12/2015: IVF #1 transferred two great looking embryos - BFP!
First ultrasound: TWO beautiful little heartbeats!!
Harmony: negative; level 2: babies look great and are boy/girl!
I love all your ideas! I have a card oicked out already for the hubs and am going tonwait until my first 8 week ultrasound and put the photo inside the card. I can only hope I actually get to do it some day
Shortly after we started TTC I bought a baseball onsie and pacifier from his favorite team. The plan was to wrap it as a gift and I'd add the pee stick with it. After time and the IUI's he knew exactly when I'd know so it took the spontaneity out of it. Then during our month off I was convinced it wasn't going to happen so when I got the BFP I was so shocked I walked out of the bathroom pee stick in one hand and the box in the other and my mouth hanging open. He looked at me and said "what's wrong?" All I could say was "umm... it's positive..." Then he hugged me and we both cried.
Since our loss was over halfway through my pregnancy I know when/if we get another I will tell him right away. It won't be elaborate but I'm sure it will be emotional again.
Re: How will you (or did you) announce to your SO?
Edited for typos
7 IUIs, 7 BFNs.
2 IVF attempts, both cancelled and converted to IUI, both BFNs.
Decided that my tired old ovaries are ready to retire.
Next step- reciprocal IVF, using my wife's eggs, my uterus!
fresh 5 day transfer (2 embryos) 4/17/17- BFP!
Identical twins "due" 1/2/17 (but anticipated arrival sometime December)
Not sure if I get pregnant again what I will do.
Since I've had two losses, one just a week after the BFP, I'm torn about whether to tell DH right away next time. I can't decide. I don't want to test before AF anymore. I'd rather skip the highest risk part and find out when there is a slightly better chance of it sticking. I had a MMC at 9 weeks with the first one, so I know I can't skip the entire risky time, but the risk is so much higher at first. And even though I'll know when I miss AF, DH won't know. I could give him some more buffer time if I wanted.
I can't figure out which is worse -- getting his hopes up a third time and losing it, or telling him I lost it after the fact. Maybe I should just ask him. Now that I've written all this, I think that's what I'll do.
BFP 2/19/15 • MMC found at 9 wks • D&E at 11 wks (age 36)
BFP 8/29/15 • CP (age 37)
TTC#2 since May 2017
BFP 10/18/17 • MMC found at 8 wks • Misoprostal at 10.5 wks (age 39)
BFP 2/16/18 • CP (age 39)
BFP 4/13/18 • CP (age 39)
BFP 5/07/18 • MMC found at 10.5 wks • D&E at 11.5 wks • Testing showed it was a girl with Trisomy 22. (age 39/40)
9/5/18 Diagnosed with diminished ovarian reserve (4-5 follicles, one ovary had none and was very atrophied)
RE says the low egg count is likely causing my recurrent pregnancy loss. Less eggs results in more aneuploidy.
BFP 9/24/18 • CP (age 40)
NTNP since 11/12, actively trying since 8/14
11/15: Letrozole, Ovidrel, TI = BFP!!!
Beta #1(14dpo)=349, Beta #2(18dpo)=2,805
12/17/15: Got to see the heartbeat (105bpm)!
1/25/16: NT scan = normal (HB=163bpm)
EDD: 8/10/16
8/8/16: Baby boy born @ 12:25am, 8lbs, 20.5 inches
5/18/17: BFP!!! (11dpo)
Beta #1(12dpo)=176.4, Beta #2(15dpo)=607.1
BFP 2/19/15 • MMC found at 9 wks • D&E at 11 wks (age 36)
BFP 8/29/15 • CP (age 37)
TTC#2 since May 2017
BFP 10/18/17 • MMC found at 8 wks • Misoprostal at 10.5 wks (age 39)
BFP 2/16/18 • CP (age 39)
BFP 4/13/18 • CP (age 39)
BFP 5/07/18 • MMC found at 10.5 wks • D&E at 11.5 wks • Testing showed it was a girl with Trisomy 22. (age 39/40)
9/5/18 Diagnosed with diminished ovarian reserve (4-5 follicles, one ovary had none and was very atrophied)
RE says the low egg count is likely causing my recurrent pregnancy loss. Less eggs results in more aneuploidy.
BFP 9/24/18 • CP (age 40)
San Diego, CA
TTC #1 since June 2015
Prior D&C due to blighted ovum 2003