Affording Kid #2

finnybooboo · September 2015

Anyone else freaking out about affording 2 kids already? I was calculating daycare costs today, and it. is. INSANE!! I want to hyperventilate when I see the amount we'll be paying for 2 kids. I know if you actually wait until you're completely "ready" it will never come, and we WILL adjust, but hot damn. I'm in the wrong business.

I'm considering changing my allotment from my paycheck to take out the equivalent of the extra weekly expense and put that into savings. 1 so we can get used to living on a smaller income, and 2 we'll have a really nice cushion by May. I'm not sure I'm ready to make the jump yet though! No more eating out or shopping for us!

Jesse835235 · September 2015

Do you take advantage of dependent care flex spending? With two kids in daycare, I know the expenses are way over the $5,000 limit, but at least you get that much toward daycare pre-tax.

asunna · September 2015

damn i feel ya, im worried about kid number 1

between the price of my immigration paperwork , moving 4,000 miles away from my home to a new country, no ability to work, and moving into a new house, with no furniture me and hubby are a little strapped financially

..we'll make due i guess...

finnybooboo · September 2015

Maybe I need to do more research about the FSA and look into that when we sign up for benefits again in the fall. I've never truly understood how it all worked.

countrygrl5533 · September 2015

We couldn't even afford daycare for one. That is one of the major reasons I am a SAHM. I started freaking out about the finances from kid #2 the minute I got the positive test. We live on one (very small) income, I'm still paying off a surgery I had to have in January, the van keeps needing work, student loans suck, etc. We already are on a pretty bare bones budget and it's going to get so much harder.

vinerie · September 2015

Does anyone have a checklist or some kind of online worksheet to help one plan for the expenses? I mean, I know we'll have daycare and whatnot, but I'm sure there are a lot of other expenses that go into childcare, and trying to plan for an average monthly cost seems like throwing darts in the dark.

TheBorg7of9 · September 2015

A nanny for two might be cheaper than day care for two. We do a nanny share with our next door neighbors. Saves a ton! Much cheaper than day care.

Bookhousegirl · September 2015

@vinerie I think it varies based on so many different factors - type of diapers, breastfeeding vs formula, are you a stuff person I.e some people are really minimalistic and the amount of money for stuff is significantly less than others. It also depends on your healthcare. I found one of the biggest expenses (besides daycare) was doctors visits. We had an awful high deductible health insurance policy and we were paying close to $200 for every sick visit (which was pretty often in the beginning) plus prescription costs!

Bookhousegirl · September 2015

TheBorg7of9 said:
A nanny for two might be cheaper than day care for two. We do a nanny share with our next door neighbors. Saves a ton! Much cheaper than day care.

This is what we're thinking of doing now. It's cheaper to pay a nanny then it is to double our daycare costs. It also allows for more flexibility with hours vs daycare that is strictly 7:30-6. My practice hours are not a typical 9-5 because I start late and go until 6/7 so not having to be tied to daycare hours will be really helpful.

babycakes8214 · September 2015

As far as a budget goes, I keep a monthly budget (although I'm not very good at updating it) but when I found out I was pregnant I did a "maternity leave budget" and then a "back to work budget".

I'm scared of how we will make it but I know we will make due somehow. Being a SAHM is not an option as I carry the health insurance and quite frankly I make more than my H does. Sometimes I think it would be better if he SAH and did side jobs (he is a mechanic) after I get home from work and on the weekends. But that will never happen either.

As far as some sort of check list- the only real added expenses (other than daycare) from my first baby was formula, which was about $100 a month by the time he was 6 months old and diapers/wipes, which we go through one large box a month. I get it at Target or on Amazon for around $30/box. Otherwise its just odds and ends, clothing, pacifiers, etc.

Bltbear82 · September 2015

Yes, particularly because we just finished preschool applications. Preschool in NYC is astronomical and the idea of two is intimidating.

mrstmoose · September 2015

@vinerie I don't know the exact costs (clearly I'm a FTM too) but we use the everydollar.com website that is from Dave Ramsey and it helps keep us organized. I've started working on a maternity budget (through May) and what our new budget will look like beginning in July (after maternity leave). If you're type A (like me), having a plan in place really helps because you know where your money is going and can plan out how you want to save over the next 8 months and how to survive on maternity leave.

I'm also super crazy about budgeting but I feel much more sane about all of the financial changes now.

vinerie · September 2015

Bookhousegirl said:

A nanny for two might be cheaper than day care for two. We do a nanny share with our next door neighbors. Saves a ton! Much cheaper than day care.
This is what we're thinking of doing now. It's cheaper to pay a nanny then it is to double our daycare costs. It also allows for more flexibility with hours vs daycare that is strictly 7:30-6. My practice hours are not a typical 9-5 because I start late and go until 6/7 so not having to be tied to daycare hours will be really helpful.

We are also thinking of a nanny, but just for one. My idea is that the nanny can be with the LO during the day and get dinner started (is that latter part too much to ask for?) We come home from work and get to play with the LO rather than try to get something going to eat. I have no idea how much this will cost.

HOnestly, I really don't know how I'm going to manage working and parenting. For some reason it seems like it will be more on my shoulders compared with DH--despite his assurances that he wants to do as much as I need him to do.

josie12367 · September 2015

We're a bit nervous...but we will make due. I'm unemployed, just graduated and got my certifications, and now I'm moving. I feel overwhelmed with just thinking about getting a job because we're just going to be moving in another year again, but I know I have to work. Our income is minimal, but we don't budget really. The only "extras" we buy is one night per paycheck of going out to eat or ordering food, one coffee date per paycheck, and one $50 or less purchase for clothing, shoes, school supplies, etc per month. This is all our income can support really if we're still contributing to his retirement savings account, our main savings, and paying off our credit card (which isn't much).

If i'm unemployed still for the next year till we move to the UK, then we'll most likely utilize WIC to help with some costs grocery wise, or if we need formula. I breastfed for 11 months last time, so I'm hoping to do that again with this LO. We're also going to use cloth diapers for the first 6 months. Our health insurance is GREAT, so we don't have to worry about unexpected costs there eating up money.

Mainly we're looking at small ways to make a difference in the overall expenses. We thankfully have some wiggle room, and a nice savings account in case we get into a rough patch. I'm really hoping to get employed quickly though, and really boost are savings before baby #2 comes, and then go back to work once the kiddo is a few months old. We'll see...

Jesse835235 · September 2015

finnybooboo said:
Maybe I need to do more research about the FSA and look into that when we sign up for benefits again in the fall. I've never truly understood how it all worked.

***Stuck in the Quote Box!***

Definitely look into dependent care FSA. It's similar, but separate from your healthcare FSA. There is a $5,000 limit with the dependent care FSA with no carryover. It's such a great benefit if you are certain you will have child care expenses. I'm a numbers person, so real examples are always nice. If someone in the 25% marginal tax bracket puts away the $5,000 in their dependent care FSA, they will save $1250 that year.

If anyone is looking for any easy financial management/budgeting tool, I highly recommend Mint. It syncs all your accounts (banking, credit cards, retirement plans, etc.) all in one place. You can view all of your transactions and they are are categorized in your different budgets (groceries, household, restaurants, gas, etc.). It's so great! I'm a huge nerd like that, though. Knowledge is power and it's amazing how the little expenses can really add up.

laurenmdrn16 · September 2015

@vinerie I worked as a nanny for a year after my son was born and I would frequently stay and make dinner after the mom got home so she could spend time with her son. I would have my little guy in the kitchen with me or he would be playing with my charge and his mom while I cooked. Or, I would prepare everything and do a crock pot dump so it was ready when they got home. It was super easy to prepare meals while the kiddos were napping. I would even make homemade baby food purees for both boys for the next day. I think if you set that up with a nanny before hand (especially if she/he specifically mentions being a good cook) you can easily work that in to the wages. Just be aware that you will need to provide the ingredients or money for farmer's markets (I would love to bring the boys to farmer's markets to pick up fresh produce for dinner).

Man, I miss being a nanny so much!

Edited because my brain no worky

vinerie · September 2015

laurenmdrn16 Just curious, if you're willing to share...You received money to go to the farmers market? Did the family tell you what to make, or was it up to you? Also, how many hours per day were you working? How much did they pay you?

laurenmdrn16 · September 2015

@vinerie We would plan out the menus on Monday so we would know what types of meals we were planning. Usually, I would do most of the planning because I love cooking (usually...just not with intense MS!). If there was any shopping that needed to be done for the family's dinner, they would either give me money beforehand or reimburse me with my paycheck. I worked from 8am-6pm three days a week (the grandmother watched the boy on Tuesdays and Fridays) and was paid $25/hr.

For reference, we live just north of Boston in a pretty wealthy/high-cost-of-living area so the $25/hr might be a little steep for other areas of the country.

vinerie · September 2015

laurenmdrn16 Thanks for the point of reference!

My friends have a 5 and 3yo. The nanny picks them up from school/daycare, gets them started on their homework, etc. and then starts dinner. That seems ideal. But how to handle this before they are in school, I'm not sure.

BuzzBee614 · September 2015

Worried about this like the rest of you! At least we have each other to commiserate. I'm staying home during the day, working from home 10-20hrs per week, and then waitressing 3-4 nights a week to make it work because paying for full time daycare where I live is just not an option unless I got a ridiculous job. My husband carries the insurance so we are blessed to have that flexibility, but I'm still stressing about money.

Any work from home moms thinking about the logistics of working with two? Right now I can do playtime then Netflix to get 2-3 hours of work in, but I'm really worried about what I'm going to do with an infant too...

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