Strategies for making up after a hormonal fight

Re: Strategies for making up after a hormonal fight

• satuttle1014 member

  September 2015

  You should just talk to your DH about everything. It shouldn't matter who started it, etc and if he said some hurtful things, let him know that too.

  
  

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• acuteangles member

  September 2015

  I haven't actually had any hormonal driven fights with my H, so I can't speak from experience.  It sounds like you are acknowledging some blame though for the argument, and I think you should acknowledge that with him as well.  He may just want to hear that from you in order to open up.  I know we are all a little more sensitive and emotional right now, but we still have an obligation to others to be decent to them, hormones or not.  Being pregnant doesn't give us an excuse to act poorly.  I realize you don't want to apologize (and I can be stubborn about these things too, so I get that), but if you feel as though you let your emotions and hormones get the better of you, you should take some responsibility.  Once you do that, you can then explain to him that what he said hurt you (and why it hurt you), and hopefully he will want to reconcile as well.  Without knowing what the argument was about or what he said, it's hard for me to offer any other advice.  

  
  

  

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• MississippiCatfish member

  September 2015 edited September 2015

  Give it a little time, swallow your pride, and apologize for whatever part you are to blame.
  
  ETA: We've only really had one situation like this during this pregnancy, and I remember something else I said. Something like, "I recognize that my hormones are intensifying this situation. They feel SO real and so rational, but I know that that doesn't necessarily make it so, and that is not okay to act out because of it." He really appreciated that I acknowledged that was playing a part, but didn't use it as an excuse, and vowed to work on it.

  *E 10/2012, H 7/2014, F 2/2016*
  

  
  

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• SoSirius member

  September 2015

  Your pride isn't worth hurting someone you love. I always try to remember that I love my husband DURING a fight and I've gotten so much better at expressing myself and staying calm. Remember if you are calm, he'll be more likely to stay that way too. Also, KEEP SNACKS NEARBY AT ALL TIMES. Don't wait to get hangry before you eat.

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• DaisyTortilla member

  September 2015

  I agree with PP...I always talk things over with DH. Pride has to be put aside when it comes to these situations. If it was my mistake, I admit to it first and try talking to him using "I" instead of accusing "you". It usually helps a lot! Good luck!

  
  

  

  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

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• BabySeaTurtles member

  September 2015

  I think apologizing and saying you're sorry will go a long way in any argument, regardless of the presence of hormones. Hopefully your H will accept it allow you both to talk rationally and productively about whatever issue is going on.
  FWIW, I don't think hormones really make us act a whole lot differently than normal other than exaggerate any emotion we would normally feel anyways. So don't beat yourself up about it too much because whatever the issue is would still probably be affecting you to a smaller degree if you weren't pregnant.

  
  
  

  
  

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• wineaddict member

  September 2015

  I'll confess to this happening at some level almost every day! I usually acknowledge that I am unreasonable at times but I also try to explain how hard things can be for me right now. I'm not a good pregnant person

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