Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Katm89
member
Re: Calling those who are Charting- TWW
CD/DPO: 24/4
TTC or TTA: TTA for now.. Trying in December!
Rant/Rave/Chart Stalk: I hate how late I O'd this cycle and how my temps slowly climb instead of shoot up.
GTKY: Biggest TTC/TTA pet peeve? I hate when people say, Oh it'll happen.
Our pipes backed up this weekend, so aside from cleaning up dirty shower water and sewage, we're likely looking at a pretty expensive pipe repair. Fun!
I get annoyed with other boards that push temping as you absolutely have to do it, and if you don't, you're an idiot. Just like our bodies are different, everyone is entitled to going about getting PG in the best way for them. At this point, it's just not for me!
Month/Cycle: 1
CD/DPO: No clue! Waiting for AF
TTC or TTA: TTC but taking very laid back approach
Rant/Rave/Chart Stalk: I hate not knowing where I am in my cycle but I will get too obsessed if I start temping. I have anxiety issues so I'm recognizing if I start to temp, I will probably go overboard with it.
GTKY: Biggest TTC/TTA pet peeve? What @als1982 said
DD #2: EDD July 2016
CD/DPO: 20/3
TTC or TTA: Somewhere in the middle
Rant/Rave/Chart Stalk: Got my first solid cross hairs and I am so excited! Last month was anovulatory and it began looking like this one was going to be that way if my temps didn't rise which was making me nervous! I'm just happy to know my body is functioning properly
GTKY: Biggest TTC/TTA pet peeve?
@gabpepsi I understand your reasoning completely. I will note though that DH is way more interested and involved because of the chart. DH is really into all the rules and science. DH was asking me about my temps and when I ovulated and he likes looking at the opks.. I was surprised. I was talking to a gf of mine and she said she thinks she might be pregnant( they are TTC) because her temps went up again.. I was telling DH and he got all excited and says well did she tell her SO. I was like IDK. He kept saying he would be pissed if I withheld that news. I was like who knew you would want to know something like that considering it could mean nothing. I have grown to feel like we are going through it together and without the charting I wouldn't have felt that way.
I'm still on BCP and I started temping last week just to get used to it since I will be going off BCP next month and will be using temping while TTA. My DH thinks I'm funny for getting so prepared but he also understands my concerns for what will happen when I stop BCP since I've been on it for about 8 years and prior to it I never had a regular period. I went from getting my period randomly every few weeks, to bleeding every single day for 4 months straight, and then being on BCP and rarely getting a period (I haven't had one in 16 months).
I'm an engineer so I'm not sure if I enjoy it because I will be able to understand my body a little bit better or just because I enjoy data collection and analysis
@Katm89 That's what I'm thinking, too.. so far they have almost all been between 97.4 - 9.7... which I also wonder if those are higher than what I will get once off BCP. I'm on progestin only birth control because of migraines so I would think that would keep my temperatures up... we'll see!
CD/DPO: 19
TTC or TTA: TTC
Rant/Rave/Chart Stalk: Nothing at the moment. I am not convinced that I O's yet so I will keep having fun with my husband.
GTKY: Biggest TTC/TTA pet peeve? If you relax it will happened. I am relaxed and it clearly is not working. But I do love the us time my husband and I are having!
Month/Cycle: 3/3
CD/DPO: CD9/not past O
TTC or TTA: TTC
Rant/Rave/Chart Stalk: I don't think I understand CM. First of all it grosses me out. But I made a resolution to actually track it this month for the first time. I started tracking it and despite the fact that I O'd on CD18 the past two cycles, I put in a W for CM and all of a sudden FF was like YOU'RE SUPER FERTILE! Even though my period just ended, I have no positive opks and my temp hasn't spiked since then. So I think it was just a fluke.
GTKY: Biggest TTC/TTA pet peeve? DH travels for work once a month and of course in our first month of TTC he's away during my fertile window.
CD/DPO: 8
TTC/TTA: TTA for now. ..TTC in January.
Rant/rave/chart stalk: annoyed that I've spotted for 3 days now . Boo! Rave is that I actually LOVE temping. It feels good to know what's going on with my body.
Biggest TTC/TTA pet peeve: waiting is hard.
Me: 33 H: 36
Married: 12/14/13 DS: 1/29/09
BFP2: 10/9/15 MMC: 11/12/15
BFP3: 4/6/16 DD: 12/12/16
Month/Cycle: 1
CD/DPO: CD6
TTC or TTA: NTNP/casual TTC
Rant/Rave/Chart Stalk: I work night shifts and try and "switch" back to being awake during the day when I'm off. It's given me a few wacky temps already, so I'm not sure how helpful temping will be for me…but it could just be my body coming off of BC. We'll see!
GTKY: Biggest TTC/TTA pet peeve? Does anyone else have to fight the urge to just tell the whole world you're trying? I'm a L&D nurse and many patients ask me if I have any kids and I have to hold back my baby fever haha (especially being around so many babies!). I just smile and say "no not yet!" (:
https://www.fertilityfriend.com/Faqs/Eggwhite-Cervical-Fluid-after-Ovulation.html
CD/DPO: 19/ 5DPO (the TWW for me **sigh**)
Rant/Rave/Chart Stalk: I thought I'd try to do things organically for the first couple of months, but this month I finally gave in and used an OPK, which was super helpful. It made me realize that I was o'ing as normal and at a good time of the month (my cycles are 28-30 days apart, I o'ed on CD13) I was freaking out because my Ovia app was telling me that my luteal phase was 11 days, but without any information on temps or actual ovulation, it was wrong. I couldn't see myself temping, though I've heard it's helpful. I'd get super obsessed and anxious!
Biggest TTC/TTA pet peeve? As others have stated, definitely the whole "If you relax or don't think about it, it will happen." GRRRRRR.
CD/DPO: 23/8
TTC or TTA: TTC
Rant/Rave/Chart Stalk: So glad it's the weekend. This has been such a long week.
GTKY: Biggest TTC/TTA pet peeve? The TWW is brutal. Absolutely brutal.
CD/DPO: 22 Still WTO
TTC or TTA: TTC
Rant/Rave/Chart Stalk: I wish I would just o already. My CM has been getting less fertile and when I add temps for sunday and monday it only gives dotted cross hairs. Just need to wait it out I guess or HIO
GTKY: Biggest TTC/TTA pet peeve? WTO. I feel like I don't know what's going on half the time. These 2 cycles I get fertile CM and no o. Then I o later. At least in the TWW, I know how long until a new cycle will begin.
BFP #1 January 28, 2016
Felicity Joy, born September 2, 2016
My Chart
BFP #2 September 11, 2020
EDD May 23, 2021