Gender reveal shower

blansaw · September 2015

So this is a bit of a rant...We had a gender reveal shower where someone set balloons on a canvas and we threw dart at them. Pink paint popped out. First, YAY we are having another healthy baby girl.

So here is where the rant comes in: Everyone started giving condolences to my husband like we just found out terrible news. I had to make comments like, "He makes a great daddy for little girls." and "There's always softball or basketball."

I know my husband likes to play sports and he would have loved to have had a boy, but he's not sad bc it's a girl so why are you acting like someone just died? When the balloons popped it was almost awkward because it was so quiet. If it wasn't for my brother stepping in and giving me a congratulations hug I think it would've just been silence. It made me so upset I cried on the way home. It was like everyone thought we failed at procreating.

Gingermom15 · September 2015

Congratulations on your healthy baby! I noticed the same thing when we announced we were having a boy. Society is definitely conditioned to value males over females from what I have seen. Several people "congratulated" us by saying they were glad we didn't have to deal with a girl, that my SO must be thrilled, that I must be disappointed, etc. a guy I work with has two daughters and his wife just had her tubes tied. Everybody acted as though she were committing a murder and asked how he was letting her do this without giving her a son. His feelings were genuinely hurt, people made it to seem his daughters were less valuable. They had struggled with both pregnancies and almost lost each of them.
People just don't try to understand and think before they speak.

hummingbird35 · September 2015

@blansaw congratulations on what I'm sure will be a strong, smart, beautiful girl! I'm irked on your behalf. Hopefully attitudes like this will change as society grows & evolves, but it looks like we still have some time for that to happen. I hope to do my share by making sure my son grows up valuing women. Good for you for recognizing that that response was wrong and icky.

ChiccoBeanz · September 2015

@blansaw congrats on a healthy baby girl! I'm sorry your guests were so rude and insensitive, and a bunch of other adjectives that I won't type out here. People don't think before they speak. Even more so, I'm sure they thought they were being "funny". They were rude and insensitive and by behaving like that, they ruined a moment for you. Again, I'm sorry. I'm having a boy and I must say my dad and fil are super excited, but my mil was sad. People just react and don't think. I suggest not taking it personally. You deserve to be happy and excited for the new life you are brining into this world, regardless of anyone else's preferences.

RSB1982 · September 2015

@blansaw I am so pissed off on your behalf. People can be so thoughtless. I want to slap the next person who asks me what sex we are hoping for (team green). How about I'm hoping for a healthy baby? An uncomplicated pregnancy and birth? That's what's really important. Oh and the relationship between two sisters or two brothers is amazing... You don't need one of each to complete a family. Gah, this just gets me so worked up. Congrats on the baby girl, BTW!

satindawl83 · September 2015

I feel your pain. Although we didn't have a gender reveal, when we tell men that we're having a girl, the response to my husband always "well, they could be wrong, and you may end up with a boy...fingers crossed."

I didn't realize the value that society placed on boys over girls until I got pregnant. Such BS.

Keep on truckin, momma. Don't be discouraged and be happy for your healthy girl!

SamiBearrr · September 2015

I didn't have a gender reveal, however when I found out I was having a boy everyone apologized to me say how disappointed I must be....

When in reality I'm the one who wanted a boy and my SO deeply wanted a little girl.

Everyone was so shocked that we were the other way around.

Just brush them off and ignore them. Girls are so much fun. And they can play sports too! In my family, the girls play all the sports and the boys sit around and be lazy lol! Me and my younger sister both played basketball, were track stars, and I played volleyball. And we both enjoy watching all the sports games with my dad.

Just because your little one is a girl doesn't mean she can't still do things with your SO like a boy would.

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