Unexplained Infertility

swansong76 · September 2015

Hi ladies,

I am new to these discussions but not new to TTC. Its been probably close to 3 years since we casually started trying. During those three years we gradually progressed to charting ovulation, then my husband got tested had low sperm count and started taking clomid. Then a year after I got tested and turned out to be fine. Now I have completed 2 rounds of IUI and still no luck. I think the most frustrating part is the "unexplained" part. There is nothing "wrong" with eithe of us, its just not working. I dont think i want to move on to IVF, it seems too intense for me and Im unsure of adoption so feel like we are coming up on the end of our road. I am trying to start preparing myself for what if this just never happens for us. Its a bit overwhelming. You try so much of your young life to not get pregnant, that its totally surprising that its going to take so much effort, or maybe not be possible at all! This is baiscally just a brain dump of all my frustrations so thanks for listening (reading)

vssbrm · September 2015

The irony of trying so hard to not get pregnant and being a responsible young adult only to end up here is SO frustrating. I had 2 "scares" with my now husband years ago, I remember praying so hard because I did not feel ready yet... I wish so badly that one of those times had resulted in a kiddo now. And all the wasted money on BC... ugh that is soooo annoying - I could have a few more handbags in my collection with all that $$ - Or a better nest egg for all the drugs we have to buy now, of which insurance does not cover at all.

vssbrm · September 2015

And good luck, I hope you are not here long!!

Aashly101 · September 2015

I'm new on here myself although not new to TTC. We have unexplained infertility too albeit I am much older (42 and DH is 32) than the average woman TTC. Doctors haven't specifically said it's because of my age though. I completely understand the frustration you're feeling at the unexplained part. You're not alone in that. Sometimes I wish there was something wrong just so we could at least be able to tell people something when they ask! We are on our 3rd and final cycle of IVF; praying that 3rd times the charm here. Good luck with your journey. Sending baby dust to all of us here for a BFP.

LoveBulldogs99 · September 2015

My new RE said that there are just certain things that cannot be tested because a test is just not available that's why some of us that goes on the "unknown infertility" category is frustrating. The only thing we can hope for is that anything else that they can test and help us with will do the trick. I completely understand the whole leaving out BC earlier and/or saving money for possible IVF but I don't think anyone ever sat there and think "you know what, I should set aside money for IVF just in case". We all thought that getting pregnant should be easy since everyone else and their mama are getting knocked up left and right. But here we are...making difficult health, financial, mental decisions on how to move forward with this thing.

I've been with my husband for 11 years. I was on BC for the first 6 years we were together. I always missed pills (cuz I'm crazy like that! Lol) but never got pregnant. Makes you think "ok so how long have I had this infertility issue if I never got pregnant then?" If we could have seen that we would be in this boat then we would have tried getting pregnant earlier on but we didn't so now it feels like we're paying for all those times we said "oh we have plenty of time to have kids!".

We've decided that we'll only go as far as 2 cycles cuz honestly, that's all we could afford. Actually, we're borrowing money from my mother-in-law to make this happen (I hate borrowing anything!). We've done 5 IUIs. We've been TTC for 3 years. All those other years of no BC (since 2009) and nothing. Never thought we'd go for IVF but I couldn't move on unless I know we've exhausted every possible way but we have to set a limit and that's ok. Otherwise, you'll end up broke (no offense to the ladies that have spent tons of money), straining your relationship or losing your mind obsessing over something (again, no offense to anyone).

I hope that you find peace on any decision that you make. Stay strong and I'm sure things will work out. Good luck!!! Long rant...sorry

Echogirlxo · September 2015

After all the testing (just 1 more blood test to go!), I think that is where we will end up "Unexplained infertility". *Sigh*

agriffin92013 · September 2015

Every month all our numbers look so good, last 3 cycles my 21 day progesterone was over 40 and DH SA was great, but still no BFP. I keep asking "What am I doing wrong" and they say I'm doing nothing wrong. But you would think that with the numbers looking that good it has to work. This will be my 2nd IUI after 5 failed TI attempts

Echogirlxo · September 2015

@agriffin92013 did you get an HSG?

swansong76 · September 2015

Echogirlxo- I did get the HSG. Very unpleasant test, but everything came back normal.

agriffin92013 · September 2015

@Echogirlxo I had hsg before re started my treatments

TheLabyrinth · September 2015

I totally get your frustration. Being young and there seemingly being no reason you're not getting pregnant sucks. Especially as you watch friends and family get pregnant with ease. I think back to all the times I stressed out during college about getting pregnant (even on BC, I was a worrier), and to end up with this scenario sucks.

I just had a pow-wow with my RE yesterday about this. I have unexplained infertility at 29 in combination with the most curved cervix/uterus he has ever encountered in 30 years that he literally cannot consistently get the catheter in. We've been off any sort of BC for over 4 years. We've done a number of IUIs and normally he'd be recommending we consider IVF if he can figure out a way to get catheters in. As someone mentioned above, there are many ways something could be going wrong to cause infertility they cannot test for that would cause the IUIs to fail: the egg(s) might not be getting caught by the fallopian tube, the egg could have a "tough" shell or the sperm is too weak, could be implantation issues, etc. etc. However I'm pretty scared to try IVF without knowing what the problem is. Who is to say that it will even work? It's a lot of money and hard on your body. That being said, it has a much higher success rate and they can overcome a lot of the issues mentioned that can't be solved by IUIs.

My doc did mention his frustration that with IVF becoming more and more successful, there is less and less focus and funding to figure out what is causing infertility issues in "unexplained" cases. I've basically done all the tests we can except a laproscopy. However, there's no reason to think I have endometriosis, so I don't plan to do basically an exploratory surgery.

Fingers crossed for you! Sometimes I feel you need to vent here if you don't have someone else to vent to. So many people don't understand what it's like.

bsckgb7 · September 2015

TheLabyrinth - I am kinda in the same boat as you. Headed for my 3rd IUI next week. If this cycle doesn't work, I think surgery will up next for me. No reason to think I endo/scar tissue either, but something isn't working. I'll do the surgery and get the all clear before continuing the stress and cost of IUI (and especially IVF).

pmakrillos · September 2015

Hello all, as I read these boards I have been somewhat stunned at how many failed IUI attempts have been made by many before they opt for IVF. Time, in terms of egg production is so vital. I say this because I'm going to be 47 this month and have tried to make the most optimal decisions not to waste time in failed efforts. That's why I'm so glad my RE and I immediately agreed on IVF right after all my diagnostics and laproscopy. The laproscopy is a important step to prepare your womb before treatment. ...turns out he removed fibroids and endo that may have been inhibiting me. All that being said, I'm very tired and nervous going into this process.

TheLabyrinth · September 2015

@pmakrillos - I think the number of IUIs is going to greatly depend on your egg reserve and age. I think for women who are on the older side, jumping straight to IVF makes more sense. For people like me (started seeing an RE when I was 28), there is more time to try and see if we can get the low tech, less strenuous, and more inexpensive options to work. Part of me thinks it's a little daunting to think that I might need to do IVF before 30. I think it just depends on the person.

tripledaggerWed95976 · September 2015

Hi everyone! So I was in the same boat...the dreaded "unexplained infertility" I'm 30 (I was 29 when I started fertility testing) DH is 40. After 3 failed IUIs I made to scary and difficult decision to do ivf (my cycle was last month).. It was the best decision I ever made. My two cents on IUI is that it really doesn't work any better than trying the natural way, especially for us "unexplained infertility" ladies. The decision to do ivf is absolutely terrifying but it has such better results than iui and I was pleasantly surprised with how much easier it was than I thought it would be. Good luck to all u ladies!

KidShrink · September 2015

I'd strongly encourage those of you with unexplained infertility to find an RE who is willing to do more to figure out what the issue is. I had very subtle/odd signs that could maybe, possibly indicate endometriosis. However, I had very light periods, and didn't have massive pain like others do (I had odd pain on my right side when getting my period, awful diarrhea during the same time, and then unusual liver problems considering I don't drink much and am at a healthy weight). I had seen numerous doctors, including an OB, who had 'ruled out' endo. My RE specializes in minimally invasive gynecological surgery. He performed a hysteroscopy as he felt the shape of my uterus was just a little too tight at the bottom (slight t-shape), preventing proper blood flow to my lining. He then did a transvaginal endoscopy to check the exterior of my uterus...turns out I had a massive amount of endometriosis. What was supposed to be a 15-40 min surgery took 2.5hrs. Some endo was also found in the wall of my bladder, so I was sent for an MRI. I got those results really late (i.e. This week, even though it was done end of July...don't ask me why the fertility clinic never bothered sharing those results with me)...turns out I still have some endo, and I have an hemorrhagic cyst (endometrioma) IN my left ovary. All of which is crazy given how little symptoms I had (I was diagnosed with the most advanced stage endo. We started treatments again the following cycle (Femara, Follistim, Ovidrel, IUI and Prometrium). Got my BFP that very first cycle. The tricky thing with endo is that 'symptoms' don't always correlate with severity. I'd highly encourage any one of you with unexplained infertility to get the lap or other explorative surgery if you can. Maybe they still won't find anything because some issues just can't be seen. Then move on to IVF to hopefully bypass those if nothing else is working. Good luck to all!

Soverthis · September 2015

I am sorry you are part of the infertility club. A club no one wants to be in. I cannot imagine not having any answers. The frustration must be so awful. We know it's my husband and he just started with clomid so we will see how that goes. We are in the same boat with your uncertainty with ivf. Right now we have taken that off the table as an option for us. Who knows what the future will hold but for now we aren't considering it. Adoption is amazing. But we are not too sure if it is for us. We talk about it as an option. But whenever we look into it it is just so overwhelming. We are going to see how the clomid goes and see if we can get the sperm healthy enough for iui. We have also spoke about using a sperm donor. To us, having a partial genetic connection and control over the health of the baby from conception is important. I read a book called Navigating the Land of IF. I found it helpful. I hope you are able to get pregnant soon. Or at least some answers. Good luck.

misshopeful1 · September 2015

To all in this thread, I also have unexplained infertility. During my lap in July stage 1 endometriosis was found and my left ovary was sticky and pushed back. We've had one TI, 1 IUI post lap and no BFP.

My progesterone is very strong, husband's sperm is great and motile.

So many people throw iVF out there. Well for us it would be almost $9,000 per cycle! We just don't feel comfortable taking on that kind of expense.

The not knowing is driving me crazy.

tripledaggerWed95976 · September 2015

misshopeful1 said:

To all in this thread, I also have unexplained infertility. During my lap in July stage 1 endometriosis was found and my left ovary was sticky and pushed back. We've had one TI, 1 IUI post lap and no BFP.

My progesterone is very strong, husband's sperm is great and motile.

So many people throw iVF out there. Well for us it would be almost $9,000 per cycle! We just don't feel comfortable taking on that kind of expense.

The not knowing is driving me crazy.

Maybe I'm misunderstanding u but don't think anyone just "throws ivf out there," I mean I guess I can only speak for myself but I dealt with unexplained infertility for 16 months before making the extremely difficult decision to do ivf......2 cycles of testing, 11 monitored natural cycles, 3 failed IUIs all before I did IVF. The only thing that worked for me was ivf, that's why I advocate for it.

misshopeful1 · September 2015

@trippledaggerWed95976, I have had my MIL, friends, doc of course suggest IVF. For us, several people have brought it up as a suggestion or idea. They're trying to be helpful but I don't think they understand how long we have to try other options and of course the expense of it.

Glad you were able to have luck IVF.

tripledaggerWed95976 · September 2015

^^ despite the downsides of ivf (like the cost of it) people suggest it because it's what works for people with long term infertility struggles...not cuz it's just a random thing that people decide to "throw out" and not cuz people think it's easy or something. I really don't understand ur point but I definitely wish u luck ttc

babyexpress · September 2015

@swansong76 Have you had your tubes checked? What about genetic testing between you and DH? I have unexplained infertility and agree with the other posters that it is so frustrating and almost better to at least find a reason and deal with it. After my 4th failed cycle, RE wants me to move to IVF. It does make me very nervous though and I will need to create a IVF Fund first so money won't stress me out during process.

riveridgional · September 2015

@misshopeful1 I think I understand what you mean. I've had a lot of people who haven't gone through this just say, well you can just do IVF or why don't you just do IVF. They throw it out there as if it is an easy, inexpensive fix to a problem. With one person, I got the impression they thought I was complaining and IVF would just be a quick simple fix, so I should just act on it in stead of complaining. When I explained to someone else I only have 2 more shots left to have a baby, their response was well then you just do ivf. I was like, no, that includes IVF. It's the reason I can only afford one more try before it. She was like, oh, insurance doesn't cover it? Um no, and it can be up to 20k or higher. I think it set in at that point

babyexpress · September 2015

@riveridgional Have you ever tried IUI with clomid? I was reading your sig and didn't notice it. I know we have chatted before, so I apologize if you have mentioned this or have already told me. Just curious if you haven't, what the reason might have been.

riveridgional · September 2015

@babyexpress I've actually never done an IUI. Our PCT results, even with limited CM on clomid, were great. My doctor said there would be no measurable difference for me in chances for pregnancy. My monitored cycle showed no additional response on Clomid. I only had 1 mature follicle, and I ovulate on my own. It also thinned my lining. The RE said it told him I likely have an ovulatory disfunction and oral meds wouldn't work for me. I'm not sure why he didn't think Femera could change my results. He recommended injects, which we did last cycle with great results follicle-wise. It wound up being a lot less expensive than we were estimated, so now we can afford to try it one more time.

We specifically asked the doctor about IUI with injects given the limited chances left. He told me that the injects put me at a 20% chance of pregnancy (same as a normal, completely fertile couple). The IUI would give me 22% chance but the 2% is less than the standard deviation, which is why there is no measurable difference. So, he didn't see why we should spend over 500 for the IUI, but said it was my decision. Not sure if we'll opt for it once these cysts go away for our last chance before IVF.

riveridgional · September 2015

@babyexpress I can't remember what I put in my signature, and I can't see it on my phone, but only 1 of my 2 clomid cycles was monitored. I was one of those who took clomid from my OB twice without any monitoring. I was hoping it would work and afraid of the RE costs.

babyexpress · September 2015

@riveridgional that makes sense. I didn't really ask about stats for TI w/ meds, I just know my RE said my chances are 1-3% with no meds naturally. With meds and IUI it jumped to 20-22%. My insurance pays for unlimited IUI, so it was a no brainer for me. If I had to pay the $500 and my chances only went up by 2%, I would do the same as you. I could see how with injectables and BD that the chances are close.

misshopeful1 · September 2015

@riveridgional, you're tracking what I'm saying or trying to say. People mean well but fail to see the financial and time invested in the process.

I will keep my fingers crossed for you and hope you get your BFP soon. Best of luck.

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