Bummed about not looking pregnant to other people???

andreaAL11 · September 2015

i know a lot of lovely mommys out there have a hard time with people commenting on how "big" they look and have a hard time with weight gain during pregnancy. This is not a discussion to rub it in your faces, so please just listen!!
I'm a FTM, and I'm due December 22nd, I'm starting my last trimester this Sunday, and up until 25 weeks, I was really small. Didn't have a bump or weight gain. Then, I guess in my eyes, I blew up like a balloon! I was excited because now people can tell that I'm pregnant!
But that hasn't happened, people always get so surprised that I'm pregnant because I'm so small. You know, sometimes I think it kind of sucks. Because I don't get the perks of special treatment from others, and I want to experience that. I want to feel like people can tell, and they see me and say "how beautiful, that woman is pregnant!" I don't know if any of this makes sense, but I hate having to explain myself when I'm stuffing my face with tons of food all day, and why I waddle a little, and why I have to pee so often!
It's not about special treatment I guess, more of wishing people could tell and then think it's as beautiful as I feel it is. Maybe it's a self esteem thing too...please let me know if anyone else feels this way =\ thanks!!

sliskevicsmommy · September 2015

You dont have to explain yourself.! You should feel beautiful no matter if people are telling you or not. Pregnacy is amazing! Just enjoy your baby!!

navyblueladybug · September 2015

I know how you feel... I'm 29.1 and people are shocked when I tell them how far I am. I started out overweight so my bump hides. I'm hoping in the next few weeks a real bump will emerge. But I get it... You want people to be excited for you and when you aren't showing it doesn't happen

Daphneh28 · September 2015

I had HG at the beginning and lost 36 lbs. I still fit my skinny jeans just under my belly. I'm 28 + 5 and have a belly that people think it's about 4-5 months along. I feel you so much honey!!!! . People make stupid comments to me like eat a cheeseburger (I am eating as much as I can) or is your baby okay she is so small when I tell them how far along I actually am (baby is like OB reassures me cause that one gets to me perfect weight and size, we have checked). I also wish I was big and luscious I think it's so beautiful and hope I get bigger so I can take preggo pictures. When I get a little down about I start thinking that as long as I am healthy and feeling good and baby is fine that's all that really matters.

Daphneh28 · September 2015

Oh and don't get me started on the stupid people that have told me I shouldn't use pregnancy to lose weight! B.......you think I threw up 15x a day for fun???!!!! You think I'm doing this on purpose!!!!!??????! Grrrrrrrrrrrrr okay mini rant over LOL!

TomekiaB · September 2015

My bump is still small too and I get it. In my eyes my bump has gotten huge but then I've looked around and noticed many people's have beer gut bigger than my bump, I don't even know if it is weight related I think my abs muscles might restrict bump from showing more. My mom said when she was pregnant with me her abs would hurt because I wanted more room than her athletic abs would give me.

My 2 positives about this is hopefully our little bumps will result in less skin distress later and I guess we miss most of the rude comments too (since, if I don't bring it up no one is going to ask based on bump size). I saw the midwife yesterday (first time since the move too see a midwife versus primary care). Anyway she commented that I looked tiny and that the bump was all baby but baby is measuring normal or maybe even slightly big (like a centimeter based on uterus size/height)...but all my husband heard was small. I had to tell DH, "no she said I was showing small but baby was normal to possibly a tiny bit big!"

sardavbak · September 2015

I'm struggling with this too! I was heavy to begin with, so I think that has a large part in why I'm not showing as much as I was hoping to (27+2) but it makes me self conscious that people may just think I've gained weight (even though I'm only +6lbs so far). On top of that, my baby shower is next weekend and I'm feeling nervous that I won't even look like the mom-to-be at my own shower! I just went shopping to try to find a maternity top that highlights my little bump, but for the most part my pre-pregnancy tops are still fitting, but not really showing off the mini-bump. Glad to know I'm not the only one who is experiencing this!

crl145 · September 2015

I feel the exact same! Im 27w and still in all of my normal clothing. I recently went back to the U.S. for my baby shower (I live overseas) and my friends thought I was lying about how far along I was.... I guess it's a compliment in a way when people say "oh you don't even look pregnant".... But I totally get what your saying. At this stage, I want to look pregnant and show off my bump. I can't wait for the day when I have a cute little tummy like everyone else who is as far along...

SamanthaMO127 · September 2015

Last night I went to my first Lamaze class...I am due December 2. There was a woman who was due NYE who looked so much more obviously pregnant than me. I feel like I get looks from people as if I am lying about the fact that I am 29 weeks...like when I went to the maternity store to buy some dress pants and the salesperson kept staring at my mid-section as if to say I didn't belong there.

But, my baby is healthy and my Dr. isn't concerned. So, I try my best to just shrug it off.

elbou · September 2015

I'm wondering if you happen to be tall?

Most of my friends and sisters are way shorter than I am and have always shown sooner. During my last pregnancy, a friend and I were due less than a week apart. She's short...almost petite, while I'm tall with a long torso. Her bump always looked so much bigger than mine because there was no room for her baby to go other than out!

I'm due exactly 3 months from today, and my bump is just starting to overtake my boobs. I'm still getting the "oh, you're pregnant? I had no idea" comments, so clearly it's not that obvious yet in my case either.

celainev · September 2015

My bump is pretty big, but I find that people aren't giving me very much special treatment because of it. My family expects me to do more work now since I spend more time at home when I'm not working... And the older coworkers at work expect me to continue working just as hard because "I'm so young, and I can handle it." The only people who give me a bit of special treatment are my friends... Haha.
Hope that makes you feel a little better!

Mother0fDragons · September 2015

As long as you and baby are healthy that is all that should matter. Anyone who says anything about you not looking pregnant can "eat a bag of dicks"! Women go through enough being pregnant, we don't need society's expectations of the perfect bump to be thrown at us to make us feel insecure. (((hugs)))
*grammar

beberoy9 · September 2015

I feel the same way! I'm due dec 18..so i am 27 weeks today...and i get "wow you're so small" all the time...i'm just starting to show now..ppl say its because i'm tall (5'10") ..but i'm happy to see that i'm not the only one that feels this way!

laurabwalker · September 2015

It's true about being taller I think. I'm short and it's like I'm all stomach, from the back I look the same as before but when you see my stomach you know. At work though I wear scrubs and since they are baggy not everyone knows, and they all seem shocked when I tell them I'm 6 1/2 months along. Maybe if you excentuate the bump ppl will start to really notice

rxredhead · September 2015

I'm only 5' and barely showing at all. It mostly just sucks because I've lost a bunch of weight and am under doctor's orders to eat some dratted food at work (got a note and everything that says I have to take a 30 minute meal break at a reasonable meal time) because the way my job is set up, nothing can get done without me so I usually don't get to eat my first meal of the day until 2-3 PM when we slow down a bit. I feel like if I had a "normal" 29 week belly people'd be more sympathetic when I told them things would take a bit longer because I have to eat lunch since I'm pregnant, but since I don't look the part, they think I'm exaggerating or just being a wimp

morganelizabeth23 · September 2015

I didn't look pregnant for so long! I had a bit of a pooch beforehand, and was overweight, so I think it stayed on the DL for way too long. I got unreasonably excited when my husband and I were picking out a coffee table and the saleswoman said, "oh, don't you pick it up honey! We've got it!" I think it was around 21 or 22 weeks.

Granted this is my first so I probably am carrying small

Good luck and revel in your bump!

- Mo

TomekiaB · September 2015

I am tall but it is all in my legs, my torso is normal to short so I don't think my height is the reason. I've never needed longer length tops or swimsuits, but my pants are very long.

momotheflyinglemur · September 2015

Prepreg I was 118 lbs and 5'5". I lost ten lbs in my first trimester. It took me until 20 weeks to get back to my prepregnacy weight after that. I was miserable. My body shape was changing but because most of my wardrobe is flowy anyways I didn't show. Now at 26w4d, I have had two people who don't see me every day notice that I am pregnant. I wanted to be big and round like my mom was with me and I know there is still plenty of time for that to happen but jeez. I try to focus on the good things that will come from not getting big until the end, like less stretch marks or a faster recovery or those last few weeks of wobbling around like a penguin.

ravi258 · September 2015

Im 28 weeks and i still have a tiny belly my doctor tells always tells me how tiny my belly is everytime i go into an appointment. Im tored enough and have enough achs and pains with my tiny belly as it is. I like not having a big belly yet.

Catherine1021 · September 2015

I'm 27 weeks and had a close friend tell me this week that I'm finally starting to look pregnant, but most people seemed surprised when I mention I'm pregnant, and even more surprised when I say how far along I am. I started off overweight though, so I know that's why. I do wish that it was more obvious that I am pregnant rather than just gaining weight.

andreaAL11 · September 2015

I'm 5'7", and I've always been really slender, like 110 is my normal weight. My weight now is 130, I'm so glad there are other moms out there who feel the same way, it's so amazing to feel like the only one in a situation no matter how weird or far fetched, but that's not true at all. THANK YOU GUYS, so much

cedixon2 · September 2015

When I was about 36 weeks along with my 3rd and had an obvious round bump and I told my neighbor that I couldn't wait to have my baby, she said, "oh I thought you were just fat!" And laughed in my face, and walked back into her house. Now my kids are telling their teachers, and they are so nice about it... Still fat with an obvious bump, lol.

satindawl83 · September 2015

vashleyhernandez said:
I dont think you have to explain yourself, as they said all feelings are valid ^-^.

I consider myself average, I was 155 @ 5'7'', so my BMI was borderline overweight... never thought so, but whatever lol.

I guess now that I am pregnant I have a small bump and people sometimes dont notice and I am third trimester too. I wear flowy blouses, so that doesnt help, but at the end of the day, as long as you feel okay who cares about your size or what anyone else thinks ^-^

Ugh. Don't get my started on BMI. I'm overweight too according to that crap.

But I second the height thing. I'm 5'9, long torso and legs and I hear the "there's no way you're that far along," all the time.

Most of us still have 3 months to go, so don't be too upset. Lots of time to balloon out!!

ChiccoBeanz · September 2015

You aren't alone. I had a McDonald's employee tell me she didn't know I was pregnant that she just thought my belly was fat when I asked her to open the bathroom for me. It wasn't until recently when I went to visit my cousin and his wife, who was in labor, where the L&D nurses knew I was pregnant. They made me feel better. I understand your pain. But please don't explain yourself to others. Just enjoy your pregnancy.

tetchy · September 2015

I looked in the mirror yesterday and was thinking-omg I look so effin pregnant. But, I think a lot of people are too scared to comment or think it's more polite just to ignore the bump. And that's ok with me because I too am guilty of that. I have seen women that are so obviously pregnant but, have been scared to start a conversation about it because WHAT IF. What if she's not pregnant. That would be the worst ever. Way worse than just ignoring her beautiful pregnancy.

lmtab · September 2015

I'm 5' 2" and 27 weeks. Still in all regular clothes and people are still surprised when I say how far along I am. I don't think height has anything to do with it.

mrs14678 · September 2015

My mom is wonderful! When we are out places, we will comment about baby stuff and people will say "oh! You don't look too pregnant" and my mom says "oh, she's carrying like I did. She's going to have such an easy birth." And the people shut up. Haha.

- carrying mostly in the hips, I guess. I'm finally starting to show at 27/28 weeks! Mom says "oh you'll get big! Don't worry!"

navyblueladybug · September 2015

When I see an obvious pregnant woman, I always reference this picture...

weasleyB5 · September 2015

Yupp! People tell me "You're barely showing!" or, "Wow, you don't even look pregnant!" all the time. It does get quite annoying bc at 28 weeks really everyone should be able to tell. I feel much bigger and when I wear certain things I look huge! But it seriously depends on the day. It's true though - I just want everyone to know when they meet me so I don't have to explain "I'm pregnant" when being annoying while ordering food, and just because people tend to treat you better. I went to Target recently wearing a shirt that really showed my bump. I felt like everyone looked at it as I walked past and it was so fun! lol.

I am overweight but not badly, and not really in my tummy. I do, however, have a HUGE torso and feel that has to do with it. Any others have a very long torso??

sbodman82 · September 2015

I purpously wear tighter shirts and leggings so my bump shows, but no one believes i am 26 weeks pregnant

SpenserMarieH89 · September 2015

I am in the same exact boat as you're in. My due date is 4 days before yours and I feel like its obvious I am pregnant but when I point it out, people are like "I can't even tell!" I've gained some weight and my prepregnancy clothes definitely don't fit me. Like you I just want that feeling of others noticing and asking I guess. Maybe it will mean our recovery will be smoother, idk. I bet you are a beautiful mother to be! Keep on smiling and be proud that you're pregnant even if others don't notice.

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