December 2015 Moms

Permission to slap, please??

celainevcelainev member
edited September 2015 in December 2015 Moms
I love the threads where we can bitch about the stupid things people say to us while pregnant. They never get old to me. Sometimes I actually cannot believe what people have told me.

Two days ago my coworker (who never sees me) told me "You're 6 months?? Well, some people carry it all in their sides."

Excuse me??? WTF.
And to let everyone know, my bump is extremely prominent for being only 6 months as a FTM.

Re: Permission to slap, please??

  • My sister in law and i are only 2 weeks apart. She is a FTM and this is my second. My brother constantly makes comments about our different body types (lets say prior to pregnancy she was like Kate Moss skinny and im more Kim Kardashian). Anyways to quote my brother:

    "How come my wife looks 3 weeks pregnant and you look 50"

    " Omg how does your husband sleep with you, you've gone fat!"

    " Ewww you look like a trucker with that belly"

    MIND YOU IM 28 weeks AND ONLY GAINED 9 POUNDS!
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  • I don't generally condone violence, but I'll definitely make an exception for these cases!! >:D<
    It is beyond me that people feel they can completely lose their filter and have diarrhea of the mouth just because they are talking to a pregnant woman.
  • fadzak said:

    My sister in law and i are only 2 weeks apart. She is a FTM and this is my second. My brother constantly makes comments about our different body types (lets say prior to pregnancy she was like Kate Moss skinny and im more Kim Kardashian). Anyways to quote my brother:

    "How come my wife looks 3 weeks pregnant and you look 50"

    " Omg how does your husband sleep with you, you've gone fat!"

    " Ewww you look like a trucker with that belly"

    MIND YOU IM 28 weeks AND ONLY GAINED 9 POUNDS!

    I'm pretty sure if my brother said any of these things his wife would be slapping him for me (she's also pregnant with their first and this is my second, although we're almost two months apart).
  • I too experienced horrible things that coworkers say bluntly..for instance I was told that at 6 months I looked really big ( side note I only gained 18 lbs, and it's a healthy weight for me...) I was also told that :"you shouldn't feel this way" when I am still throwing up because I have hyperemesis..please..I really can't stand the stupidity and ignorance from people who you would think be more understanding...

    Did I mention I am a nurse and I have to deal with sick people all day, so having some coworkers day these things really hurts.

    Thank you ladies for listening, you do understand.
  • You can all slap away. I want to slap the couple eating in the waiting room. There are 5 pregnant women doing their glucose tests and/or screens, and in they walk with their food that smells so good. Nobody else in the room is allowed to eat, and at least one of the others hadn't eaten in probably 10-12 hours. I am having vengeful thoughts about someone doing the same to her when it's her turn in this position ~X(
  • ssn109 said:
    You can all slap away. I want to slap the couple eating in the waiting room. There are 5 pregnant women doing their glucose tests and/or screens, and in they walk with their food that smells so good. Nobody else in the room is allowed to eat, and at least one of the others hadn't eaten in probably 10-12 hours. I am having vengeful thoughts about someone doing the same to her when it's her turn in this position ~X(
    Ooh, if this had been at my hospital when I was getting my glucose test done. They'd have been lucky they were already in the hospital.
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • What an @$$hat.... My brother would never be allowed to speak to me like that.... but since yours is acting like a little butt head....just wait till he starts going bald and destroy his balding shiny headed world mwuah hahahaha!!!!!! 
  • fadzak said:

    My sister in law and i are only 2 weeks apart. She is a FTM and this is my second. My brother constantly makes comments about our different body types (lets say prior to pregnancy she was like Kate Moss skinny and im more Kim Kardashian). Anyways to quote my brother:

    "How come my wife looks 3 weeks pregnant and you look 50"

    " Omg how does your husband sleep with you, you've gone fat!"

    " Ewww you look like a trucker with that belly"

    MIND YOU IM 28 weeks AND ONLY GAINED 9 POUNDS!

    I would definitely slap. And punch. And kick. Oh my goodness, those are so rude to say....
  • Oh yes these are all slaptastic to me!
  • I ran into a nurse I haven't seen in a while she grabbed my belly and said "soon huh" I said december, she looked at my size and said OMG. Yes damnit I'm big, I measure big, I get it. You don't need to dreakin remind me
    BabyFetus Ticker

    DD May 2005 MC Nov. 2012
    MC Aug. 2014
    Chemical Feb. 2015
  • My dad had a mild stroke on Monday and he is usually soft spoken and always has his filter on. On Wednesday we were having dinner and he looked at me and asked, "Are you sure you're not due in November?"
     I blamed the stroke and told him what he meant to say was January. LOL
  • I had one women tell me im huge for only being 26 weeks then today i was told i do not look pregnant at all... I wanted to say so you think i was just fat????
  • @fadzak aren't brothers they only people you are allowed to hit without judgement?! ;)
  • groovylocksgroovylocks member
    edited September 2015
    When my coworkers (all male) swear, they apologize to me, then to the bump. 

    I swear like a sailor. 

    I just find the apologies annoying but they're so sweet i'm not sure how to tell them to STFU and keep cussing if it makes them happy.
  • I was told this:" oh isn't this convenient that you are pregnant" when I asked to be reassigned to any other patient who was not on tuberculosis precautions....I'm sorry..but no it's not convenient when I'm short of breath and when I have to wear a n95 mask that stinks like plastic...I'm telling you..some people who have not gone through pregnancy are total jerks.

  • Yea slap that person you should NOT have a tb patient when oregnant
    BabyFetus Ticker

    DD May 2005 MC Nov. 2012
    MC Aug. 2014
    Chemical Feb. 2015
  • Surprisingly I really haven't gotten any straight up rude comments yet. What I hate is that people are so condescending and can't wait to correct you or tell you "how its gonna be". Like there is literally nothing you can say to avoid it. Like how in other threads we have talked about the how are you feeling question. "fine" leads to more questions to try to prove that you are in fact not fine. Or "just wait until blank, I felt like blank". And then answering honestly leads to "just wait till baby is born, say goodbye to sleep" (real original dummy 8-| ) or whatever the case may be.

    The other day my dad and step mom were telling some story about some friends they had when they were younger. My step mom says something about how they had a baby to save their marriage. And then laughed and asked if that made any sense to me. I jokingly said "oh yeah, cuz there's nothing that adds romance back to a marriage than getting pooped on in the middle of the night" or something to that affect. And my dad goes "just wait!" Uhhhhh wait for? Like my statement was about how its difficult. Are you arguing? Like just wait, I wont get woken up in the middle of the night? Lol I just don't get treating somebody like they have no idea what they're talking about no matter what they say. Haha I'm saying I realize it will obviously be difficult. Why argue? :-?
  • My FIL's new wife feels the need to comment on everything I post about baby on Facebook. About her experiences. AND, she sent me a message asking about a movie title, which I answered. She asked how I was feeling, so I answered "pregnant" or some such small answer and it turned into her writing like 8 huge paragraphs of her describing all her birthing experiences in detail! I just kept replying with a ":)" or something about how her daughter will appreciate hearing that later if she ever has kids....

    I'm trying to be subtle about reminding her that this baby isn't her grand kid, and she's not a mother to me, my husband, or his brothers. She's only been a "step mom" for a year, and no one really likes her. Ughhhhhhhh!!!
  • EmmyMommy123EmmyMommy123 member
    edited September 2015
    Let's see - from the same person:

    When my belly was first starting to be visible she wanted pictures, and her response to the pictures was "oh just wait until you have a real belly" ....well to me this is a real belly and I'm clearly excited about it so shut it.

    Then when my belly "popped" I was "huge", and now when she saw me in person she came up behind me and said "oh yes you can TOTALLY see you're pregnant from behind. You're really wide like I was with my boy." It took all my willpower not to slap her right then and there. If I am - so what - will that comment make me feel good? Probably not so why make it?? But it especially bothered me because I've specifically been told by many strangers you can't tell I'm pregnant until I'm seen from the front or side so I felt like the comment was meant to be a jab.

    Can we just make a law where if you have nothing but "you are amazing and radiant" to say to a pregnant woman than you say nothing at all!?
  • A friend who has had two kids (and I find to be extremely body conscious about her size where I am comfortable in my skin whatever way it is) is always making "compliments" that have snide undertones. She lives away from me so thankfully I haven't had to deal with her comments regularly - but here are some examples. When my belly was first starting to be visible she wanted pictures, and her response to the pictures was "oh just wait until you have a real belly" ....well to me this is a real belly and I'm clearly excited about it so shut it. Then when my belly "popped" I was "huge", and now when she saw me in person she came up behind me and said "oh yes you can TOTALLY see you're pregnant from behind. You're really wide like I was with my boy." It took all my willpower not to slap her right then and there. If I am - so what - will that comment make me feel good? Probably not so why make it?? But it especially bothered me because I've specifically been told by many strangers you can't tell I'm pregnant until I'm seen from the front or side so I felt like the comment was meant to be a jab. Can we just make a law where if you have nothing but "you are amazing and radiant" to say to a pregnant woman than you say nothing at all!?

    Misery loves company, I see this especially being true for women who are self-conscious about their bodies. Sometimes they can be vicious creatures.
  • The conversation I had with an older cashier at Babies R Us:

    Cashier- "do you need a gift receipt?"

    Me- "no, it's for me. And I don't need the hangers either."

    Cashier- "they will probably need the hangers, so you should give them with it."

    Me- "it's for me, and no I won't need the hangers."

    Cashier puts the clothes WITH the hangers into the bag and says "The mom will most likely need them."

    Me, now frustrated - "they are for me. I am having a baby."

    The cashier then looks at my belly (for the first time) and says "gosh, you are far too young"

    I then provide her the details of my age (nearly 24), marital status, and other details that she had no business needing to know before I storm off.
  • The conversation I had with an older cashier at Babies R Us:

    Cashier- "do you need a gift receipt?"

    Me- "no, it's for me. And I don't need the hangers either."

    Cashier- "they will probably need the hangers, so you should give them with it."

    Me- "it's for me, and no I won't need the hangers."

    Cashier puts the clothes WITH the hangers into the bag and says "The mom will most likely need them."

    Me, now frustrated - "they are for me. I am having a baby."

    The cashier then looks at my belly (for the first time) and says "gosh, you are far too young"

    I then provide her the details of my age (nearly 24), marital status, and other details that she had no business needing to know before I storm off.

    SLAPPPP wow so rude. And at a baby store no less!!
  • The conversation I had with an older cashier at Babies R Us:

    Cashier- "do you need a gift receipt?"

    Me- "no, it's for me. And I don't need the hangers either."

    Cashier- "they will probably need the hangers, so you should give them with it."

    Me- "it's for me, and no I won't need the hangers."

    Cashier puts the clothes WITH the hangers into the bag and says "The mom will most likely need them."

    Me, now frustrated - "they are for me. I am having a baby."

    The cashier then looks at my belly (for the first time) and says "gosh, you are far too young"

    I then provide her the details of my age (nearly 24), marital status, and other details that she had no business needing to know before I storm off.

    Don't feel obligated to provide any information to snotty, nosy people who assume they know your situation. I look young for my age (25) people usually think I'm 17-18. The older ladies act appalled that I'm pregnant and if any of them ever ask if I'm too young, I'll tell them they're too old to be to rude and judgmental. Lord know what else I'll say. I have a big mouth and low tolerance for B.S.
  • groovylocksgroovylocks member
    edited September 2015
    My new favourite. People on facebook who don't have children but know a lot more about the best way to do it than you or your doctors do.

    I had a guy tell me on facebook that C Sections and epidurals are "disrespectful to the miracle of childbirth"

    Don't worry. He didn't get away with it. 

    I have another friend who not only insists natural birth is the only way to go, but was sending me graphic images of "epidurals gone wrong" and that sort of thing. 

    I explained to her that until my baby was about a month old, I'd have to remove her from my friend's list. And that it wasn't exactly personal but she was literally making me completely batshit insane. 

    Don't let casual acquaintences get away with this sort of thing. Tell them how they're making you feel and if they continue to upset you, just cut them off. Be done with them if you can. It's not worth it.
  • Today at the laundromat, I had one older woman (I'd say at least 70) just sit there and stare at me/my stomach for a solid five minutes. Then, after I stared back at her and she looked away, she started making comments to the laundromat attendant about how young unmarried women should have more self respect than to get pregnant barely out of high school. Unfortunately, I'm very passive and prefer to avoid conflict in any way, so I said nothing, finished my laundry, came home and cried. I was both so angry I wanted to punch her in the face and hope she choked on her dentures, and so upset that I cried enough my hand shook almost as bad as it did when we put my dog to sleep (my right hand shakes when I'm crying, but only violently like it did when I'm practically inconsolable).
    I'm 22, in my third year of university, (technically) engaged to an engineering student in his fourth and final year, and this bitch opened her fat mouth to ruin my day.
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • Awe Caitlyn!! Don't let some crusty old lady's unhappiness and stick up her ass ruin your joy!! <3

    And WOW groovy RE the Facebook people. I just don't understand the balls some people have to tell you what they "know" but literally have zero real knowledge or place to say.

    I've had comments about natural birth being the "only" way (before I had developed my own opinion), only to find out that those same people ended up in a position during their labour where non-natural methods ended up being their best option. How do you get to tell me what to do when you first hand had conflicting experiences!?
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