TTC After a Loss

TTC after Chemical Pregnancy

Hi all. I have been through months of fertility treatments and finally got a BFP but was  told by my doctor  today after monitoring my hcg levels that my pregnancy is going to result in an "early miscarriage" or chemical pregnancy . I am devastated. I know I wasn't pregnant very long but this still feels like a huge loss to me and I am beside myself. I was terrified I would never get pregnant and when I finally heard the word "positive" I couldn't believe it-it was a miracle. My husband immediately jumped to naming the baby and getting so excited. For anyone else who has been through this, how did you get through it? I am going to start another round of fertility treatments this month but I just feel like I'm going to be mourning for awhile.

**BFP and loss warning**

Me: 29
DH: 29
Us: Married Valentine's Day, 2015
DH: No issues.
Me: PCOS, unexplained infertility (whatever that means!!)
June 2015 Medicated TI cycle: BFN
July 2015:  Medicated TI cycle: BFN
August 2015: IUI: BFP. Chemical pregnancy :(
October 2015: IUI: BFN
January 2016: Egg retrieval: 10 frozen embryos!
March 2016: FET Cycle- 2 embryos transferred!: BFP !

Re: TTC after Chemical Pregnancy

  • First and foremost, I am so deeply sorry for your loss. I had a chemical pregnancy in May and I hate the name because it makes it sound like you were never pregnant but you were and it is still a huge loss. I would feel guilty for feeling so horribly sad about it because I felt like a lot of people were thinking that it was no big deal since it was so early. The moment you get that positive, you start to love your baby and the fact that something you want and love so badly is take away from you so quickly is devastating, heart-breaking and unfair. Give yourself time to mourn this loss and don't let anyone let you feel like it never happened. Time will help you heal but you will never forget, you just learn to live with it and move on. When you are ready, try again and don't lose hope. Best wishes to you! Good luck!!!
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  • carrieandrcarrieandr member
    edited September 2015
    I've been TTC since January, had a MMC in March at 9 weeks followed by a d&e two weeks later. I finally got a BFP again on 8/29 and was so relieved. A week later, I lost it. I cried harder after the chemical than I did the MMC because losing another pregnancy after everything I've been through was crushing. I will say that it was easier to mentally adjust to not being pregnant this time, since it was only a week. It still affects me, though. The bright side is that you did get pregnant. That is a good sign. I hope you get another chance very soon and it goes well.
    TTC#1 since Jan 2015
    BFP 2/19/15  •  MMC found at 9 wks  •  D&E at 11 wks (age 36)
    BFP 8/29/15
      •  CP (age 37)
    BFP 11/18/15  •  DD born at 41 weeks <3(age 37/38)

    TTC#2 since May 2017
    BFP 10/18/17  •  MMC found at 8 wks  •  Misoprostal at 10.5 wks (age 39)

    BFP 2/16/18
      •  CP (age 39)
    BFP 4/13/18
      •  CP (age 39)
    BFP 5/07/18  •  MMC found at 10.5 wks  •  D&E at 11.5 wks 
    •  Testing showed it was a girl with Trisomy 22. (age 39/40)
    9/5/18 Diagnosed with diminished ovarian reserve (4-5 follicles, one ovary had none and was very atrophied)

    RE says the low egg count is likely causing my recurrent pregnancy loss. Less eggs results in more aneuploidy.

    BFP 9/24/18  • 
    CP (age 40)
    BFP 5/11/19  •  Fraternal twins  •  MMC found at 10w5d (Baby A 6w, Baby B 10w)  •  Misoprostal at 11 weeks (age 41)













  • Hugs. I just had a CP last month and it's an awful feeling. I hope that you get another chance soon!
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I just had a cp last weekend. Even though I only knew about the baby for a week I'm still devastated and mourning the loss. today in particular we were planning on telling my parents (they live 2 hours way and were coming into town) so it's been rather rough. sorry for everyone's loss
  • I just passed the anniversary of my early loss. Allow yourself to mourn as long as you need to. I struggled for a few months, and it helped me to validate my feelings by reminding myself that I became a mom the second we got the BFP, and DH and I are still parents even though we never got to meet our LO. I struggled with the EDD in April, mothers and fathers days, and the month of my loss anniversary. I decided to get a tattoo to commemorate the loss on my birthday this year, which was the day we told my family we were expecting last year. That has been so helpful, because every time I look at it, I am comforted. You are most certainly not alone!
    me 30; DH 35
    TTC since May 2014.
    Aug 2014 BFP, EDD April 22, 2015. Low progesterone, started suppositories. Loss at 5w6d.
    Nov 19, 2015 BFP at 13 dpo, EDD July 29, 2016. MMC discovered 12/29 (9+4). Natural miscarriage 1/16 (12+1).
    AMH results 0.42, 1.2; FSH 12.1, AFC 10, dx DOR. 
    RPL testing results normal. Nurse recommended progesterone suppositories in TWW.
    Clomid + trigger + TI cycle August 2016 - failed. Thin lining.
    Femara + trigger + TI cycle December 2016 - failed. Thin lining.
    Short LP (8 days).
    Acupuncture & Chinese herbs starting January 2017, lengthened LP to 10 days 

    Summer 2016 LFAF awards: 



    Winter 2016/2017 LFAF awards:

  • So sorry for your loss! I just had the same thing happen, this is second loss 1st was a bit farther along. I really wish you the best. I'm grieving too and exhausted from this whole process! I want to take a break but I will be 36 in November so don't feel like that's a good choice, but also think you need to take time to mourn. Not to mention I can't imagine my hubby touching me right now!
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