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January 2016 Moms
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Walking on eggshells

jjodomjjodom member
in January 2016 Moms
typically you hear about people having to be cautious around pregnant people because who knows what reaction you will trigger from them in their hormonal state.

I can't talk to my mom or husband without thing being blown out of proportion. Examples from the past few days (I'm also on a work trip so this is all communicated via text and phone call)

-"my tummy is upset, there must have been too much grease in the food from the restaurant" my husband automatically thinks it has to do with the baby and thinks the pain is from her not doing well.

-"I can't wait to be home, this hotel has bad pillows and I don't think I'm getting good rest. I woke up with a little bit of a headache. I might have to run and get Tylenol" my mom calls immediately saying headaches are a sign of preeclampsia and I need to call my doctor asap. I tell my husband about how jumpy she is and he read what it's was and it scared him :(


I feel like I can't talk about anything I am feeling because everyone is going to assume the worst. I don't want to just bottle it up but its getting to that point.
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Re: Walking on eggshells

  • enkbenkb member
    For me it has been helpful to share the rates of some of the more commonly talked about complications, so that concerned parties get an idea just how unlikely alot of these things really are. I think now its so easy to hear about all of the worse case scenarios that people think bad stuff is much more likely than it really is. If there are specific issues that concern them (like pre-eclampsia) maybe you could make up a little guide to some of the other warning signs so they feel like they can help you monitor yourself without jumping to the conclusion that every headache is a disaster?
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  • Emott13Emott13 member
    Oh man. It's the exact opposite over here. I'm freaking out about every little thing and DH is the one keeping me sane. I don't know how you're dealing! Have either of them come to an appointment with you? Maybe being able to chat with your doc and get more info about how great your health is would help them to feel better about it. My mom has freaked about a couple of things but the best way to combat fear is knowledge. :) Even if you don't want them at the actual appointment, ask your doc if he'd be willing to take a call from them just so they can get any fears cleared away. Just a thought! But good for you keeping calm! I'd have had a million panic attacks I'm sure.
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  • cawalpcawalp member
    My husband is the opposite and thinks that everything I say is wrong is just a part of pregnancy and that I should just suck it up. My mom however freaks out if I so much as call her at a weird time and she thinks I'm calling with bad news. She is very sensitive because she lives far away from me. I've found it helpful to tell her what I'm feeling and then immediately follow it with 'it's perfectly normal it just sucks'. This allows her to be sympathetic without worrying about something being wrong. Maybe try something like that, just start the sentence with 'I know it's a normal thing to happen but ...' This will let them know that you know what to look out for and that it is not anything serious.
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  • jjodomjjodom member
    My husband comes to EVERY appointment. and is even on BabyCenter learning as much as he can about each stage of my/our pregnancy. its sweet, but sometimes it can be a little overwhelming. lol 

    I am glad i have people in my life that care so much but i guess i do need to stop being so "specific" as to what im feeling unless i feel concerned. Its just rough when i'm not home and all these conversations aren't face-to-face. 
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  • ariasbabyblogariasbabyblog member
    I have half this problem. My DH is all chill about everything and says if I'm honestly concerned I should talk to my OB, while my MIL is googling like a mad woman and "You have cancer!!! Take these pills!" about a headache. It's very frustrating that I really can't whine and get any commiseration out of either of them. All I want is a "oh that sucks" but it's kind of all or nothing with them. My own mom and a little better about commiserating, but I also get all sorts of advice that I don't want/need/this is my second mom. I just want someone to whine at!
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  • ChrissyD1203ChrissyD1203 member
    @cawalp that's my life EXACTLY. I give you credit though - I avoid giving my mom any details. If I say oh I have a headache, for the next three weeks she'd be asking me how my head is-- not that she thinks it's something particularly bad, just she would constantly suck it up. If I tell my husband something is bothering me he rolls his eyes and goes "isn't that a pregnancy symptom". He doesn't know anything about pregnancy so I don't know why he would even say that.
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  • Wicked4589Wicked4589 member
    My husband over reacts to everything. My doctor told him to chill. Lol
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