Question for BTDT moms!

J&D2007 · September 2015

What do/did you find to be the toughest stage or age of raising your LO? Are the first two weeks the hardest? Is it tougher at 3 mos? 6mos? I secretly am hoping you are going to say the first month, because then I'd be almost done with the hardest part;-)

toccoaparker · September 2015

Just wait for ages two to three..

jesselayne8 · September 2015

Depends on the child. My first child was a piece of cake from birth until 2yrs. My 2nd child was a challenge from day 1 and continues to be challenging but in different ways as he gets older. #3 so far is super chill and sleeps a lot.

Miz_Liz · September 2015

This is a hard question to answer. The first few weeks certainly seem the hardest because it is new...they are sooooo helpless...you are suddenly getting less sleep than you could have imagined...your boobs hurt...your body hurts....you are still learning your babies cues. Then suddenly the get easier, they fuss less, they smile, they sleep more. And then they crawl. Life ends. Mobility is a game changer! Then you adjust to that. Then they talk! And they learn the words "no" and "why". Truth is, every stage is different. They each come with their own set of challenges, but also their own set of rewards! Go watch the, "It is just a phase" video that @CaliforniaDream87 posted and remember it when it is tough. It is cliche, but they do grow up too fast and suddenly you find yourself missing some of these tough phases you are now wishing away. Try to enjoy it, even when it feels like you will never sleep again or like you will never feel human again or have a night out to yourself. You will, so don't blink, it happens too fast!!

ann_jeremiah · September 2015

I would say when your first child is born, the beginning is toughest As you add healing, adjusting and sleep deprived.

My 4 year old right now is VERY argumentative... And my 2 year old is sassy.. :-/

CaliforniaDream87 · September 2015

My son is only 2 so I can only speak of what's difficult at the moment. Right now the toddler stage is the hardest for me. Im sure once I have 2 teenagers who are exactly 2 years apart I will have a change of tune

The first month was tough. I mean, the sleepless nights/cluster feedings/witching hours were exhausting. You really have no idea how your life changes until baby is actually here. Be easy on yourself OP. It's not easy being a parent and as @Miz_Liz aid every stage will have its difficulties.

bpwife&mama · September 2015

3 years has been incredibly challenging. Obviously the newborn stage is hard because everything is so new. The first year gets easier and easier because you get accustomed to what they need. Toddlerhood is a complete roller coaster. I'm writing this as my 3 year old kicks all of his Legos under the couch because I just told him not to.

EmEeGee · September 2015

@Miz_Liz "and then they crawl. Life ends." Bahahaha. So looking forward to this.

hclzmm14 · September 2015

I have an 18 month old and now a 4 week old, and I can tell you without a doubt the toddler is a million times more difficult than a newborn. Toddlers need constant attention and are always learning and having tantrums over the dumbest things. It is all great and amazing but it isn't always easy, that's for sure.

emmacake08 · September 2015

I personally had the hardest time when my LOs were 1 month until they were 3-4 months. That's when the witching hour crying spells started and they had more awake time. Every evening when DH would get home, they were crying. I would try to tell him they'd been good all day, but he didn't believe me because they were so crazy. The 5 Ss really helped but some nights they just screamed and screamed while we shushed, rocked, and fed. DH used to call them "sleep terminators".

After the 4 month mark, the craziness slowed down and they started to get more personality and we've enjoyed all the stages so far after that. I think DH had a really hard time bonding with screaming infants that didn't do anything.

SashaDenn25 · September 2015

Im not a BTDT mom but as @Miz_Liz said check out the video @CaliforniaDream87 posted about its just a phase, so dont miss it. After watching that video and crying like a baby with my baby in my arms and knowing this may be my only little baby, I have become a lot less of a crying upset mom and more of a im determined to make us get past this moment mom. I tackled the 3 week growth spurt with the help of a post and now we are at a 4 and a half week leap so she gets a little upset now too. I just cuddle her and soak her in as she calms down listening to the beat of my heart and shhhing in her ear. I know you arent trying to, but dont wish these times away. They are only this small for such a glimpse in time, as I have learned from at the BTDT moms. Soak it up!!!

julesventura · September 2015

jesselayne8 said:
Depends on the child. My first child was a piece of cake from birth until 2yrs. My 2nd child was a challenge from day 1 and continues to be challenging but in different ways as he gets older. #3 so far is super chill and sleeps a lot.

Seems like you have my kids! Lol same with me. And each baby is different. My first two were high demand babies but #3 is super chill so I'm just soaking it all in!

Boslove · September 2015

For me the infant stage was the hardest, because they can't verbalize what's wrong, so as A FTM I was constantly nervous and second guessing myself. This time around it's a little easier with reading the cues and learning your child's specific needs. I also learned to enjoy this stage because it will go by the fastest.

jesselayne8 · September 2015

julesventura said:

jesselayne8 said:
Depends on the child. My first child was a piece of cake from birth until 2yrs. My 2nd child was a challenge from day 1 and continues to be challenging but in different ways as he gets older. #3 so far is super chill and sleeps a lot.
Seems like you have my kids! Lol same with me. And each baby is different. My first two were high demand babies but #3 is super chill so I'm just soaking it all in!

I am trying to soak it in too!! I don't want to put her down because I don't know if she is my last. I want a 4th but DH needs some convincing.

SidraJedi · September 2015

For me the first four months of being a new parent were the hardest.

I have a 30month DD and a newborn DD. It has been so much easier the second time around and I get along with my toddler so well. In my 30 months of experience those first four months were rough.

I HATE the "everything goes in the mouth phase" though. That's my least favorite part of parenting babies; sand, mulch, mud, lint, shoes, the cat, EVERYTHING goes in the mouth

jlsweets · September 2015

I have personally found age 2 to be the most difficult!

KateDerek · September 2015

This is a hard question since it does depend on the child, and no doubt most ages are difficult in their own way. It's been my experience that stages for my first son that were tough (like three was awful for him but I loved the time between age one and two) were the opposite for my second son (one and two were harder and there was a breeze). Makes me wonder what my little girl will be like. Currently my boys are 8 & 4 and my daughter is 5 weeks.

I think I can definitely agree with the newborn stage being hard with each of them, even though I haven't had any huge issues like reflux or things to deal with. It's just tough to have a baby that typically prefers you and only you, gets up 10000 times a night and is new to the world and therefore you and it are trying to figure everything out. It does get easier after those first couple months and a routine is established. But then they learn to crawl and walk and talk and the years fly by and yes, they grow more independent but there are other challenges that arise like their attitude, social interactions, school, etc.

Lalala2326 · September 2015

Honestly I have LOVED ages 1-2.5 My almost 3 year old is starting to become challenging but mainly if she doesn't get quite enough attention during the day. The first 6 months with her though was a nightmare. Between the horrible reflux and hours upon hours of screaming both day and night, her first 6 months is a total blur. This baby seems to be more calm but still has her screaming moments. I am really looking forward to when she gets to be about 6 months old too. I just think it will be more fun. I like getting out and doing stuff with them and they don't get really interactive with stuff till around then.

kettlekitten · September 2015

I thought the first 6 weeks of DD's life were the hardest weeks of my entire life! I have heard the phrase 'it doesn't get easier, it just gets different' a lot but i honestly think it has gotten easier and easier. I hope I can say the same for DS, even though he is -so far- a pretty easy baby! (Don't want to jinx myself tho).

There are a lot of challenges to each stage but I am just not a baby person, I like the toddler stage better because you can chat and play together and reason with them (sometimes!). Even though they drive you crazy every day. So it depends on the baby you get, and it depends on your personality and preferences too. But whatever happens, you'll get better at managing your LO, you'll start to get more sleep, and, therefore, it will get easier!

prpl11butterfly · September 2015

Well, my niece hasn't been here since she was a baby (moved in at 2.5 yrs) but I have to say once she started kindergarten, all hell broke loose. See, before we had her in school, she was not as exposed to things ( attitude, clothing styles, electronics). When she went to school, it was all iPods and rudeness, and I don't want to wear that. Its only gotten worse in first grade. We actually got along back then. Thankfully she's a bit of a tom boy, so the clothing isn't too much of an issue.

banfrog · September 2015

With my two oldest 2 -3 years have been the hardest. They both went through a really bad biting phase during that time. Made it impossible to arrange play dates. They both were poop Picasso during this time too.

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