hi there,
I am having issues with my daycare arrangement for my 17 month old. I am a FTM and have been having issues with daycare provider not being able to get my daughter to nap which has spiraled into a whole bunch of things. She thinks my daughter has Sensory processing disorder (SPD) and has suggested I look into this. I have online, I disagree....but for the sake of my daughter have decided to pursue with her doctor and have her evaluated by a place that specializes in 0-3 year olds. This hasn't happened yet so in the meantime I was wondering if anyone has any experience with this disorder or has a child around this age if you could offer some information (really of any kind) that is typical of this age. She will be 18 months at the end of September.
TIA
Re: whats "normal" for 17 month old
My questions.. Do you have problems getting her to nap on the weekends? Is their routine/timing different? I know some day cares switch to letting kids nap on the floor at a certain age (rather than in a crib) so is that the problem? Not napping not is a thing most kids do at some point so I wouldn't go straight to a medical issue unless there are other problems as well, but that's just me. Good luck! Let us know what you find out!
yes she does nap on the weekends and yes their timing is different ( I have addressed this with them). she needs a nap by 10:30 and they are trying to put her down at 12:00. I have been "working" with them for two weeks now trying to coordinate times and routine without success. and yes she has recently transitioned to the floor too. I feel that the not napping is the cause of the other issues but I am not sure hence the proceeding to the doctor. that is why I was kind of hoping someone would have some helpful info on what is typical for a child this age.
there was a page and a half of reasoning but some of the things she listed were:
frequently falls or trips for no apparent reason
fisted grip on crayons: not using silverware properly
always on the go (short attention span)
takes socks off; wont wear a hat
hitting, pinching, frequent temper tantrums
mouths objects excessively
climbs on furniture
hard to have a two way conversation: language seems behind
enjoys messy play
--- I guess the things I am wondering about most are language and movement because I feel she is right on point.
The tripping and falling- has she had a lot of ear infections? That can affect balance.
Fisted grip on crayon is totally normal at that age. Daughter uses crayons/markers at least 5 days/week (she's obsessed) and she VERY RARELY starts out with a three point grip, but always slides to fisted. At 19 mo.
Silverware is a practice thing- daughter still doesn't consistently use hers, and only a spoon correctly.
Activity level would have nothing to do with a SPD, but again, a lot of kids are super busy at this age, and toddlers aren't exactly known for huge attention spans.
Not liking socks and hats- normal toddler behavior.
Hitting, temper tantrums, etc-- could be normal depending on frequency/intensity etc. that would be a pediatrician question, but wouldn't point to SPD, I wouldn't think.
Mouths objects- teething? Even if not, exploring objects with mouth is still normal at this age.
Climbs on furniture- normal toddler behavior (frustrating, yes, but actually shows development)
Conversation- ...... I'm not sure what she means by this. Does daughter look at you when spoken to? Babble to you and on her own? Again, pediatrician question about language development.
Messy play- totally normal toddler behavior. If she DIDN'T like messy play at all(coupled with a lot of other things) I'd be more likely to think SPD.
I worked with infants and toddlers for 8years, and I'd be a little concerned with a teacher who knew this little about toddlers!!
If your daughter had had a lot of ear infections, that would explain both the tripping/stumbling and the language. Out of your whole list, that would be the only things I'd clarify with your pediatrician for sure that she is on track. The rest may be difficult behaviors for a teacher to deal with in a classroom setting, but if she's unable to get a toddler to nap, then I'm assuming she's not great at classroom order either, and your kid may be picking up stuff that other children are doing too.....
Sorry for the super long response, I just feel that if this is what your child's teacher thinks is abnormal, I kind or wonder if she has any toddlers who she thinks are doing well!!!
See this is my dilemma --- I think its pretty normal behavior too & the things that aren't are pronounced by lack of sleep in my opinion...like the frequent temper tantrums, hitting, pinching.
no she only had one ear infection when she was an infant ... she does trip and fall but I don't think its excessive and its something I notice her do more when she is tired or trying to run (which is relatively new for her)...but sometimes she doesn't skirt around objects on the floor
the language thing is the one that I am having the hardest time with because my daughter has quite a few words that she says and uses in context & her receptive language I thought was good ... I say come on get your doll we have to go & she gets her doll and heads to the door ... when I tell her to wait because I have to lock the door she stops and waits while I lock the door ... she understands a lot ... whether or not she obeys when I say no climbing on the chair .. well that's a different story
she is still teething so I don't think saying she mouths things excessively is accurate for her age
My daughter does the tripping/stumbling when she's tired (I call her my drunken sailor ) so that makes sense as well if she's not getting a nap in.
If the teacher doesn't want to work with you on getting your child to nap, in your place I would probably start looking for alternative daycare. A 17mo should still be napping, and not napping can cause them to fall behind. A tired toddler is a cranky toddler, and is also not able to learn as quickly or retain new skills easily.
I would still talk to your pediatrician about language development, and where he/she expects her to be. And your pediatrician might honestly be someone you could ask about how to talk with your daycare provider about what expectations are normal for her age!!
Zerotothree.org is also a good resource for both parents and teachers about development and ways to help your child.
its a home daycare with a 4 year old, 21, 12, and 4 month old & her daughter who I believe she has to count because she is 6. I am going through with the evaluation for SPD for my own piece of mind and to ensure that if she does have it... she gets the help she needs but I am going out of my mind waiting for that to happen. After her evaluation I will have to make a decision to stay or go but I hate to pull her out now when I will most likely be changing daycares when we move in July. She is willing to "work" with me on the naps but it is not working. My daughter has not transitioned from two naps to one nap yet and this is part of the issue too. I pick her up some days and she hasn't napped at all and immediately falls asleep in the car or she has finally napped at 2:45 or there about. Its frustrating because when she is home she naps around 10 and 2 and bed at 8:30. the whole thing is a mess. thank you so much for your opinions. it makes me feel less crazy for being mad and frustrated !
oh and I will check out that website.. thanks
However, a lot of those listed including mouthing, socks, hitting-etc, messy play are SPD 'symptoms'. My DS has many of those. SPD is different in each kid though. Hard to 'diagnose'. BTW it's not even a real diagnoses anymore!