37 weeks and terrified of labor and delivery

Xxmommysammi19Xx · September 2015

I'm a FTM and I'm very excited to meet my son soon but I'm terrified of giving birth even with an epidural I'm scared I won't be able to handle the pain because I'm a wimp when it comes to pain and I'm terrified of tearing or have episiotomy when I'm pushing and I'm scared I'm going to feel everything when I'm pushing I'm scared I won't 've able to do it. I would love to hear good stories of labor delivery to get my mind at ease (please no horror stories)

Texascat · September 2015

I was in your position and I can safely say that labor was way easier than I expected. My contractions were never more than period cramps and a little more than an annoyance. The IV hurt the worst (and I've had them before) and even though I was literally shaking with fear for the epidural insertion, i barely felt it. It was seriously nothing! I slept after the epidural and didnt feel much through my water breaking until I was 9.5cm and that was literally just feeling like I had to poop. I pushed for 2.5 hours, had a 3rd degree tear (of course I didn't feel), birthed a 9lb7oz baby, got stitches, and the worst part of all that was the cramp I had in my butt from being dehydrated. Pushing was just lots of pressure but no pain. Overall, I was so pleasantly surprised with how easy labor was based on what I had built it up to be. Even after starting to breastfeed and recover, I'm more comfortable now than I was the last month of pregnancy. Just take each step of labor as it comes, know that it's normal to be nervous, and you'll do great!

mamadeez · September 2015

My mom only used laughing gas and they ended up cutting her to speed up her already very fast delivery (4 hrs from first contraction to final push) due to me becoming stuck without oxygen. She has told me that the connection and awareness of me that she felt during the birth was amazing. She told the doctor to make the cut because she knew how long I'd been without oxygen and any pain that resulted was lost in her desire to deliver me safely. It was a fast delivery which was probably hard on her small frame and I was a larger baby for her at 8 lbs 7... But she has spoken so highly of that physical sensation of feeling the baby that it's encouraged me to go as natural as possible.

It is a frightening thing but after my first "Is this it?!" moment I've been getting more excited about giving birth. Wishing you luck!

LouLouLove · September 2015

I've given birth with an epidural and with no pain meds at all. Both were good experiences and not scary at all. With my first I got the epidural and while labor was long, I felt very little of it once they gave me the epidural. This time I had no pain meds and while there were more intense periods, the pain was manageable and once it was done I had my baby with me and all was kind of forgotten. If I have a 3rd I think I'll probably go natural again, so that tells you it can't be that bad. And I tore both times but didn't feel it either time. Or at least this time I didn't feel it stand out from the rest of the pain.

Just remember birth really is a safe and natural experience. And if you're getting the epidural the pain really won't be that bad!

theglitteredpterodactyl · September 2015

I just gave birth, ftm, with no pain meds and it was very meditatively intense. Exist in the moments in between the contractions, and remember that the pain you feel is not a sign of danger or anything being wrong, but that your body is stretching and growing. I felt some pain, but I could also feel a lack of any danger signs from my body that you usually have when you injure yourself, which was very comforting to me.

Also I won't go into the details but my deliver did end in a bit of a horror story worthy tear and the aftermath of that was worse than birth but it was still a moment that ended and now, even with the added healing challenges, it's so much smaller than the beauty of having my baby and holding her and getting to know who the person I grew for nine months is. It's incredible and vastly overshadows everything else.

babyplut · September 2015

I am on my third after ten years and I am also still scared. I had my first two with laughing gas to help me out and I don't remember being scared those times. It's normal to be worried it's a big thing you are doing but your body is meant to do it and women have been doing its for years, you will be fine. It can't be that bad if we do it more then once

julesp83 · September 2015

It's amazing how your body works once your in labor. I was starting to be terrified prior to my due date because of course everyone tells their birth horror story. When I went in to labor on Sunday, I was amazed at how well my body just did what it needed to do! Just focus on your breathing and remember your body has been preparing for this moment for months!

Cupcakequeen1000 · September 2015

Hey I just had DS 2 on 9.3.15. In the beginning the contractions do suck. I did an epidural this time and with my DS1. The epidural was painless. You think because it's your back it's going to be this awful pain but it's not. Both times I felt no pain. I also had my son this time in only 5 minutes of pushing and with my first it took about 25 minutes of pushing. I had great experiences and I did tear some but thats normal and the recovery isnt as bad as I feared both times. I think it's completely normal to be afraid i was both times but both times have been great.

booksandcleverness81 · September 2015

Perhaps check out the "birthing without fear" blog and read some more great birth stories, and you will see that a lot of the fear we have is placed on us by society- birth doesn't have to be scary and all pain is not bad. Also, make sure you have a good support system, because having the right people around you can make all the difference. You CAN do this, you ARE strong enough!

hopeful87-2 · September 2015

I'm a FTM and gave birth almost 2 weeks ago. I was planning on getting an epidural but for medical reasons found out at the last minute that I could not get one. I was scared to begin with but when I found out I had to go non medicated I was terrified. Honestly though, once you are in the moment you stop thinking about your own worries and just do what you have to do for your baby. I never thought I'd be able to have a non medicated birth but I did it! The painful part of my labor was only 25 minutes, everyone is different, but I really wasn't in pain until they broke my water and then it all went very quick. I had significant tearing due to progressing so quickly but for me that has not been nearly as big of a deal as I thought it would be. 12 days out and I feel just fine! (Still won't be having sex for a while but I feel fine doing day to day activities).

The nurses made the biggest difference for me. They were so calming and knew just what to do. I never took a birthing class or anything but they walked me through every step of the way. It seems really scary, but once you know how close you are to holding that baby in your arms some weird maternal instincts (that I didn't even know existed) take over and get you through it! Plus, if you are getting an epidural I heard they are AWESOME (look at all the birth announcements that say that). I'm hoping I can get one next time!

jen83mn · September 2015

I absolutely loved my birth experience (and prior to this thought one of my friends was nuts for saying the same thing!). My water broke at 9:45 p.m. I was admitted to the hospital at 10:30 p.m. and was 3 cm dilated and 90% effaced. I didn't feel any of my contractions at that point, so we just chilled in the room and watched a movie. I laid in bed for awhile, then sat on a birthing ball and just rotated my hips to help baby move down. I got in the labor tub around 5 cm dilated when I had just a small amount of pain from the contractions. After 15 minutes I ordered the epidural and was 6 cm dilated when it was administered. The epidural was a piece of cake! I was nervous only because of what I'd heard, but the initial numbing shot felt just like any other shot, and I didn't feel the epidural go in at all! Within 20 minutes my contractions were pain-free and I felt so relaxed! I took a 3-1/2 hour nap and was almost 9 cm when I woke up. I still didn't have any pain. I was 10 cm within an hour but baby wasn't completely in the birth canal yet and was facing sideways instead of backward, so I waited another 45 minutes before starting to push. By that time baby was right where it was supposed to be and I started pushing (still no pain, but I could still tell when my contractions were happening). The only time I felt a little pain was when baby's head was halfway out and wasn't going back in in between contractions. I pushed for an hour before baby was born, but probably only have 15 minutes of pain and it wasn't unbearable ... I didn't cry or scream or anything. After baby came out they placed him on my chest immediately and I felt nothing after that (I was so busy staring at baby!). My placenta came out without me even noticing, and the doctor stitched me up with no pain ... I could feel her doing it, but it didn't hurt. I ended up with a third degree tear which was sore for a few days, but the Tylenol, ice packs, tucks pads, and Dermoplast spray helped and I didn't need anything stronger. I absolutely loved my birth experience, and of course the reward at the end is the best part!

kanga915 · September 2015

I've had two completely different but completely amazing births with no meds. No shame in an epidural if that's your choice. The beautiful thing is you have choices. Read a lot, watch birth videos. It's not as dangerous and crazy as most believe. It's a natural human process that works almost all of the time. And in the moment you're about to meet your LO you will not care if you tear or poop or anything else, trust me! It's not a big deal. Your body heals quicker than you'd think

seamonkey4 · September 2015

Also a FTM...hope my story brings you some hope and strength that you can do it! I was laboring at home after my water broke in the night. My sister(15 y.o) had her first day of school in the morning and I wanted my mom to be able to see her off and get her pic. I had planned to do this without meds. Until about 6 am I was able to actually sleep the 6 min in between contractions. Then they picked up a bit more and I said we had to go. I was terrified bc I was convinced I was only 4-5 cm dilated and there would be no way I could handle the pain of full labor. Got to the hospital at 7:25, triage nurse was waiting for the resident to come check me to see how dilated I was and I said I can't wait! She decided to check me and was shocked to feel a head fully engaged and I was 8 cm. her and the other nurses got me into a room ASAP, took some vitals real quick and paged the doctor. I didn't even have a name bracelet on! They wanted to hook me to a monitor to check on baby. The doctor came in and it was push time. 4 pushes later, my perfect baby girl came out! It would have been even faster except she descended so fast her heart rate dropped and they made me not push during one contraction so she could get acclimated and give her heart rate a chance to come back up. Not pushing was worse than laboring! But it worked and she got a perfect 10 on her apgar. Honestly, when I heard that I was basically ready to push upon getting to the hospital, I realized the pain was not as bad as I had anticipated and I was able to carry on with the high I got from knowing my body was made for this and this is a natural thing I can do. You can do this. I had a lot of fears going into this. But I couldn't have asked for a better birth story! I almost don't want another baby for fear that it will never be this easy again. Good luck mama. Just remember, you can do this! You were born to do this!

Knottie00400192 · September 2015

You'll be fine, get your epidural and wait until doctor says push, you shouldn't feel a thing. At least I didn't lol. And if you start feeling pain before its time to push, ask for more of the epidural medicine.

37 weeks and terrified of labor and delivery

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