Co-ed baby shower — The Bump
Baby Showers

Co-ed baby shower

Hi, i'd like to know some of you guys ideas on having a co-ed baby showers so my husband and his friends can join in on the festivities. This is our 1st child due February 14th

Re: Co-ed baby shower

  • MrsFL2015MrsFL2015
    500 Love Its 100 Comments Second Anniversary First Answer
    member
    edited September 2015
    I think it depends on your social circle and how you set up the shower.    There are just some groups of men that don't believe in having anything to do with a baby shower.   There are other guys that will gladly come along and hang out.  It also depends on where/how you have the party.  If you do a co-ed BBQ baby shower outside with volleyball or other "BBQ" type games, then you might win the guys over.   You might not have a great response if you have a co-ed shower in someone's living room or at a restaurant and play a bunch of traditional shower games.  I don't know too many guys that would be thrilled play the clothes pin game. 
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  • A traditional shower is not gonna fly with guys... so it probably depends on what you want out of your shower. We had ours at a restaurant, but still had a few games and present opening, which guys generally can't stand. Instead DH just spread the word to his buddies (whose wives were attending the shower) that he would be having drinks in the bar area, if they wanted to join (no "diaper party", or even invites... just a text to join him for drinks) . He ordered a few apps and bought a round of drinks and they all just hung out. They popped into the shower off and on for a bit, and retreated to the bar when the girly stuff went on. Worked out perfect for everyone since he got to see some of his family, but didn't have to sit through the whole shower.
    CharminglySouthernKate0034happyhernanadiaz132003
  • My H, his buddies, my dad, FIL, BILs, all did a golf outing that day. None of them have any interest in attending a baby shower, and in my circle, it's typically a ladies only event.

    That said, a co-Ed shower can double your guest list and expenses for the host, so better to check in with them to make sure what their plans are as far as hosting.
    Designermomma
  •   That said, a co-Ed shower can double your guest list and expenses for the host, so better to check in with them to make sure what their plans are as far as hosting.
    And yes, so very much this!!  What your host can/ wants to do matters here. 
    Designermomma
  • A co-ed shower is being planned for me. Frankly, I just don't enjoy all women showers with those cheesy games. I mean, I never enjoy baby food tasting contests, the pin game, plastic babies in the ice cubes, melted candy in a diaper or anything like that. It's going to be a bbq with some yard games (horseshoe, corn hole, etc) and a baby book raffle with some awesome gift baskets to give away. A lot of important people In my life are men and it just wouldn't be as enjoyable if I can't have them there.
  • sarahgn said:

    A co-ed shower is being planned for me. Frankly, I just don't enjoy all women showers with those cheesy games. I mean, I never enjoy baby food tasting contests, the pin game, plastic babies in the ice cubes, melted candy in a diaper or anything like that. It's going to be a bbq with some yard games (horseshoe, corn hole, etc) and a baby book raffle with some awesome gift baskets to give away. A lot of important people In my life are men and it just wouldn't be as enjoyable if I can't have them there.

    For what it's worth, I've never attended a shower, nor hosted a shower, where any of those so called "cheesy" games occurred. I don't think an all women's shower necessarily equals cheesy games. However, if you have male friends who are eager to participate, then by all means....

    I wouldn't be bragging about asking for additional gifts though...it's a little in poor taste.
  • Gingermom15Gingermom15
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    member
    edited September 2015
    Nearly every shower I have been to has those games. It will be nice not to have everyone obligated to join in them for my shower. As for the book raffle, it is my hosts' doing and wasn't my idea. I didn't know about it until we got the invite. How is that bragging about asking for additional gifts? I have a pretty tiny registry and have told everyone who has asked that I have nearly everything for baby already.

    ETA my cousin is my host and we are a family of readers. Everybody gifts books to one another for everything, regardless if it's a special occasion. The few friends attending are the same way. Many of them have contacted me letting me know how excited they are to participate and that it was a great idea. I agree, I wouldn't ask for extra gifts myself or brag about what I ask for.
  • chop29 said:
    Hi, i'd like to know some of you guys ideas on having a co-ed baby showers so my husband and his friends can join in on the festivities. This is our 1st child due February 14th
    First, I'd check to see if your host is willing and able to accommodate extra guests.  Co-ed showers will likely double the head count and increase other costs such as food and beverage.

    If your host is able to do this, I'd maybe skip some games.  Personally, I'm not a fan of them but I'm also not opposed.  Some people really enjoy them while others don't.  
    Because fall

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  • Thanks guys for all your input.
  • :: shrugs ::

    MY husband has been to two baby showers and asked to not go anymore and for me to just tell people he has plans for the day.  These were showers where they tried to "guy" it up too.  That being said, that was him.  Others might have fun, I don't know.  
    CharminglySouthern
  • :: shrugs ::

    MY husband has been to two baby showers and asked to not go anymore and for me to just tell people he has plans for the day.  These were showers where they tried to "guy" it up too.  That being said, that was him.  Others might have fun, I don't know.  
    I bet this often happens.  If you're a FTM who doesn't really like the idea of having a traditional women-only shower, or you have mostly guy friends and you want to include them here's a suggestion: decline the shower and instead have a "last pre-baby bash" party and invite the whole gang.  Have a good time hanging out with friends, which is what you really want to do.  Don't register, don't make it about gifts.  People who want to get you a baby gift will find a way to do that without the shower.  But don't try to force a bunch of husbands, dads, brothers, and boyfriends to attend a shower by making it a barbecue with beer or forcing the dads to participate in a diaper raffle.
    High School English teacher and mom of 2 kids:

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    VORwassuphoesSassenach1743
  • I've only been to one co-ed shower and it was awesome. They called it a "Beer and Butts Party" instead of a shower, and it was exactly how it sounds.. They served beer and Boston Butt, and everyone brought "butt-themed" gifts for the baby (diapers, butt paste, etc). It was held outdoors, there was good music and alcohol, so the guys enjoyed it every bit as much as the ladies.. Ha.

    On the other hand, I would never make a more "traditional" shower co-ed.
    AEG84
  • 1. I am with the other poster that hates the cheesy games, but would prefer that the baby shower be women only. I also see it as having some girl time.....my husband and kid stay home.

    2. I think that co-ed showers are weird, but IF there was to be one, it would involve NO games, great food, and mostly just hanging out. Most men aren't going to sit there and ooh and ah over baby junk. 

    3. I have had several friends have co-ed showers, and I love seeing the look on my husbands face when I tell him it is co-ed. Its kind of funny. But then I make sure that he has plans that day, and we go in opposite directions....
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  • For my first a co-Ed shower was planned for me. There weren't any games just lots of food and people. It worked out well for our families and friends as it was used as a catch up time for most people and a time to have extended families meet each other. We ate, opened presents, mingled, and enjoyed each other company and that was it.
  • Co-Ed showers are nice as a get together, but keep in mind the costs are usually elevated due to both men and women attending.

    A few years ago my MIL and I offered to host a shower for a friend. She insisted on it being co-ed and the costs were double what we expected. Be mindful that the person offering to throw it may not be planning on spending that much.
  • I attended a co-ed (we call them Jack & Jill showers) and it was awful.  They made games to try and incorporate the men. One game was for the men only- and it was basically a beer chug from a baby bottle- first one to finish wins (because we all know those tiny nipple holes are going to keep them from doing it).  My FIL bit the tip of the nipple to make it bigger, then took it off the bottle and just stuck it on his beer bottle to drink with.  Needless to say that game took FOREVER.  I hate the cheesy games and I'm a woman! 
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  • Sassenach1743Sassenach1743
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    member
    edited September 2015
    Friends of mine had a co-ed "Baby-Que" this past April... it was somewhat torturous. They played that same beer chug from the baby bottle game with the men, it was totally lame and not at all cute to see grown men sucking on baby bottles. Then they brought out a pinata shaped like a pig (no idea why they thought this was relevant at a baby shower) and blind folded my pregnant friend then handed her a broom stick to hit it with... that was frightening considering she was 8 months along could barely swing the broom stick. The rest of the party was just like any other get together, which to me wasn't as fun because I was really looking forward to talking to my friend and the other ladies there (guess I was craving some girl time) but that just wasn't what happened. And the opening of the gifts went okay but seemed to divide the party anyway. The men just drifted off to the other end of the patio to talk and drink while the girls focused on the gifts.

    I don't know. I just didn't have as much fun as I've had at traditional "just the girls" baby showers, and I'm not into the cheesy games either. I'd just rather enjoy the girl time and especially the girl talk! I don't see why baby showers need to include the men, especially if they don't want to be included. My husband did not attend this shower with me, although he is friends with this couple, simply because he wasn't interested in going to a shower, co-ed or not. He's even told me ahead of time that when we are expecting... he's not coming to my shower either. To each their own, I suppose. 
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  • I had a co-ed baby shower but did write on the invites if it was co-ed or do anything special for the guys. I did not expect my female friends to bring their husbands (and none did) but my DH was there and invited a few of his close friends and I invited a few of my close male friends from childhood. My dad brothers and one uncle were also there. It was mostly females in attendance with about 10 male guests who are all very close to us. We did not have any games besides a guess how many jelly beans in the bottle thing. We spent the shower hanging out socializing and catching up (shower was in my hometown and I had not seen a lot of the guests in quite some time) almost everyone stayed way past the "end time" And all the guys appeared to have a fine time. When we opened presents most of the guys were out on the deck drinking beer socializing with each other and just kinda popping in every so often but other than that the party was not very segregated. My shower host also did a book instead of card and almost every single person at the shower told me how awesome the idea was and I only got 1 repeat book out of about 35! I teared up when we got home reading all the notes guests had wrote in the books for my LO. They are so special to me and the books were definitely the most cherished and thoughtful gifts I received at the shower.

    ANYWAYS. I say do what you and your friends will enjoy. None of my friends are uptight and I really don't think I would want to be friends with someone who was so judge and side eyed people for such trivial things. I had a fantastic laid back shower with girls and guys of all ages and it was a blast.
    Gingermom15jlmartinez517m8881
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