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I'm Infertile on Tuesday and by Saturday I'm a full time mom!!

landrews441landrews441 member
in Infertility
Long story - short: I have had 2 eptopic pregnancies this year (1 in Feb, 1 last Tuesday). In both cases they had to do emergency surgery and remove my tubes. So now I'm INFERTILE.... And we all know the struggles that can come along with that and the roller coaster of emotions that we feel. In Vitro will be our only option.

On Saturday, my DB received a call that his 7 yr old daughter will be coming to live with us. It is the best thing for her and I LOVE her like she is my own. I am just having a hard time because I wasn't done grieving, I needed more time. Now I have to scoot those feelings aside and be strong for her. I don't want her to see me upset because I don't want her in anyway want to think it is because of her.

Any advice on how and when to cope??
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Re: I'm Infertile on Tuesday and by Saturday I'm a full time mom!!

  • kuposa17kuposa17 member
    I'm so sorry for your losses! And that definitely isn't much time at all to grieve, let alone recover physically from surgery! I don't have any experience with what you described, but I do have experience with counseling/therapy and I believe it is a great way to work thru emotions. For me, it has actually sped up the healing process (a little bit) and could give you some "tools" for dealing with this situation.
    me: 39  DH: 42
    TTC: since April 2014
    IUI #1-3 Jan-April 2015 (all BFNs)
    IVF #1 May/June 2015 - cancelled due to poor response
    IVF #2 July/Aug 2015 - BFN
    DE IVF #1 March 2016 - BFP
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  • sfleisssfleiss member
    I am so sorry for your loss. You are allowed to grieve and be mad and experience the whole gamut of emotions that come along with your hard time. I know it is going to be hard, but you do have to refrain from falling to pieces in front of her. You are not going to be around her 100% of the time, so opduring your time away, use that as your coping time. I would also make sure to set aside time for yourself everyday, thirty minutes for a bath, walk, gym, whatever, just so you can focus on you and focus on your healing. It's amazing how strong we can be when we need to. I am a teacher and mc at work, and didn't take the next day off to cope. My students needed me, so I was stoic at work, and a wreck at home. Behind closed doors, go wild, just try to keep it together in fromt of her. Good luck!!!
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