December 2015 Moms

WTAF?! Inappropriate things people say

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Re: WTAF?! Inappropriate things people say

  • My belly is huge for 25 weeks. And everyone tells me so. My family. Friends. Coworkers. Medical professionals. I also had a shop assistant at Pumpkin Patch (kids clothing store) ask me lots of personal pregnancy questions...when was I due, boy or girl, have we picked names, have I felt much movement or kicks.....where about has my placenta attached....."


    The placenta question is SUPER weird.
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  • The guy whi said that to me left the company....so it's all good. Why are people so weird?!
  • Probably the best comment I got was from an ex coworker. When I announced it at a lunch we were at with our ex boss he said "I thought that was the last thing you wanted!"
    Oh any my ex boss said "I thought you might be pregnant but then I thought maybe you were just getting fat"
    Yeah...
  • Mizuiro007Mizuiro007 member
    edited August 2015
    For the most part I haven't had it too bad. Mostly now I get the "oh man that's gonna suck" look when pepole realize how close in age my kids will be (although my grandma kept teasing me and reminding me her mother managed twins and another baby nine months after, actually made me feel grateful).

    I got so tired in the beginning when I'd tell people and probably 95% responded wishing this one's a girl since we already have a boy. How about wishing for happy and healthy?

    Lately I'm just getting a little frustrated with my mom. I've been worried about my weight. I lost in the beginning and the two months haven't gained at all. The OB said if I still haven't gained this time we'll be heavily discussing it. So I was concerned when I told my mom and have her tell me she's relieved. I gained so much during my first pregnancy she's been hoping I won't gain with this one.

    Later when I talked about feeling big movements and seeing it from outside she worried that the baby is huge, despite lack of weight gain and baby measuring small at the last scan.

    Now it's hit her and she's worried baby is small and says I need to talk to the OB and have them check the size. Uhm, I already have a repeat anatomy scan scheduled right before I see her next. She's got this.

    *My mom told me this week she's worried because I'm not as big as I should be. Hubby just tells me "nah, you're huge".
  • The only thing that really got to me was a co-worker of mine told me I need to take three months off of maternity leave and there was no excuse not to. I told her I really needed to get back to work after baby because I can't afford to take three months off and she told me that that was outrageous that I should be saving for it  --- great, thanks for making me feel bad not only about leaving my baby after 6 weeks, but that I really need to work to support him -- I'm sorry but money doesn't grow on trees!!! 
  • I work retail pharmacy our patients ar just now starting to notice. I'm 25w6d. I love how they just take it up on themselves to say oh I didn't know you were expecting. When are you due. But do NOT give you time to answer and say looks like any day!!! Most when I do say December 9th. Say oh wow! That's still quite a ways off. I always answer back with not that far for me, and Christmas is only right around the corner. They then just give me this blank look. And usually say oh wow it is I better start thinking about shopping! I think haha if I'm gonna be freaked out about December being close then so are you! (This is my first) so I'm a little scared!
  • My bf's mom told me yesterday "I hope you're doing everything you're supposed to be doing...I don't want any retarded grandkids" ....I don't even know wtf that's supposed to mean.
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    ealiska said:
    After all this I think I'm going to have a quick "what not to say to pregnant ladies" mini lesson with my new 7th graders when we start.
     I have self-contained this year. This shall be interesting. My kids new before the summer started thanks to morning sickness. Hopefully, we will build a great rapport/community in the classroom and they will just all be calm lol.

  • mhg54 said:

    DH called my nipples dinner plates. Thanks honey, that really puts me in the mood!


    I got pancakes.

    Now I want pancakes... Or maybe just some maple syrup.
  • I'm not showing enough for strangers to have the guts to ask me anything yet, but I did have a friend of my husbands kindly tell me "you don't even look pregnant, just like you've let yourself go!" As if that was a compliment. Thanks dude :-S
  • koala1107 said:
    I'm not showing enough for strangers to have the guts to ask me anything yet, but I did have a friend of my husbands kindly tell me "you don't even look pregnant, just like you've let yourself go!" As if that was a compliment. Thanks dude :-SS


    I'd have said: Well we know I'm pregnant, so what's your excuse for how you look? Then did the Willy Wonka facial expression. 
  • "How are you feeling?"
    "I feel great."
    "No but really, how are you feeling?"

    ... what am I supposed to say? Oh, you're right, I feel like shit and that's the only way I'm allowed to feel because I'm pregnant. Is that what you want to hear? Am I not allowed to be having an "I'm feeling great" day. I'll take note of that next time. 

    I also just really hate that my pregnancy is all the matters these days. It's always about how I'm feeling, are we ready, what are we doing to prepare, blah blah. I'm still a person and I still have other things I enjoy talking about. :(:( 

    Thankfully I haven't had any fat/big/not due until December? type comments. I've actually had people telling me I'm too small and CAN'T be six months along. Thanks for even making THAT sound like I'm doing something wrong. Much appreciated.
  • Apparently I don't dress pregnant enough. The nurse at my new doctor office was like "I didn't even notice you were pregnant!" I'm almost 25 weeks and there's a good size bump so either (1) she not very observant which isn't good considering her profession or (2) I'm not wearing shirts that look maternity enough? My first thought was "so I just look fat??" I think she meant it as a compliment but felt otherwise. Lady at my office keeps telling me how big I am.
  • 1. An acquaintance a few weeks back, before my belly popped, saying they weren't sure if I was pregnant or had just put on a few pounds. I think that's worse? 
    2. Coworkers using my pregnancy as a reason to tell me how much weight they put on and never lost during their pregnancy -- 10, 20, or 30 years ago. Also, their horrific and terrifying delivery stories! 
  • My two:
    1. I can tell your pregnant by your face, it's really filled out... Great I have a fat face, thank you!
    2. Wow You can't even tell your pregnant in that... Which usually means, you just look fat. Loose, flowy tops are not your friend in pregnancy.
  • My bf's mom told me yesterday
    "I hope you're doing everything you're supposed to be doing...I don't want any retarded grandkids"


    ....I don't even know wtf that's supposed to mean.

    Omg what, I hope she wasn't serious
  • I've already started getting people asking if I'm, "ready to pop," or, "due any day now," as well as the, "maybe it's twins," comment. I think I'm going to start replying something like, "that's not very nice," or the more inflammatory, "no, but how about you?" I feel like the hormones are different this time, so I don't care as much about looking big, but someone needs to let these people know that these type of comments are not ok! It made me feel like a whale last time & I would almost cry every time I got a comment like that. The only acceptable comment about a pregnant woman's size is commenting on how small or cute she looks. And if you can't say that, then KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT!
  • I've had two separate people tell me I don't look pregnant... but i 'look like i had a baby 3 months ago and haven't lost the weight yet'  >:P


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  • So today an employee at McDonald's was going to deny me usage of the downstairs bathroom. I had told her I was 6 months pregnant and not going to walk all the way upstairs and to the back, as I get pretty winded. She told me I don't look pregnant but like my belly is fat... -_-

    I didn't flip out on her.... just used the restroom and left. I was having a long enough day as it is and didn't have the time or patience to flip on her like I normally would have. Some people have no common sense.
  • New client the other day eyed my belly for a solid 5 mins before saying "so you must be ready to go any day now" umm.. Nope. Still have 3 months left, thanks.

    A (male) friend told me I got huge since he last saw me and I said ya, I don't think this shirt helps (as it was baggy) and he says, maybe it's time for maternity shirts. Guess what? It was a maternity shirt. He has a kid of his own, he should know better than to make size comments.
  • I've had the 'you don't look 6 months along' comment but I don't know if it's a good thing or a bad thing? Baby is growing fine but I carried small with DS so maybe it's just the way I am?

    In saying that, I've also had the complete opposite... "Are you pregnant?" And when I reply with the 'yes I'm 25 weeks' I get the "ohhh I was hoping you'd say that I thought you had just put weight on & I didn't wanna say anything." Thanks a bunch!
  • My husband's best friend wife, told me I have to have a girl because her husband wanted a boy last time and they had another girl (3rd). So my husband can't have a boy.  We don't know what it is, nor do we care.

    I'm tired of people asking how I feel.  I feel pregnant, which is NOT fun for me.  I suck at it.

    My 2 year old daughter looked at my belly and said, "Mommy, you big!" Thanks kid.  *hugs*
  • You ladies are much nicer pregnant women than me. I don't take rude comments nicely. My mother's friend told me "OMG! You are getting huge" in front of a group of people.

    My reply was "and what is your excuse" .. my very funny doctor told me to use that line and it will get people to leave me alone. Mind you I've only gained six pounds and I'm 27 weeks. I workout three-four days a week, so I found her comment unnecessarily rude.

    My DH said I was rude but I think a lot of comments towards pregnant women are rude. oh well. she didn't show up to my baby shower lol
  • One moment I'll get the "aw you're so little!".. And then next thing you know someone else is saying "OMG ARE YOU SURE THERE'S ONLY ONE IN THERE?!"

    My husband's uncle managed to insult me, my husband, and his wife simultaneously at a get together. He was bragging about how when he knocked his wife up, she was huge! Like okay soo you're insinuating that I'm too small, that my husband didn't do a good enough job "knocking me up", and that your wife got huge when she was pregnant... She flipped him off for all of us. :)
  • My husband keeps getting unsolicited advice from 3 of his coworkers. Two of whom are male, and not only are they not married or in relationships they don't have children.

    They keep saying he doesn't understand how overwhelmed we will be and how tired he will be (we are FTP). It's not like he is saying parenting is going to be a breeze! He hasn't said anything (other then maybe I'm more experienced as I have practically raised children and worked in day cares, but we know that its not the same as one of our own).

    They also said that I can't help with a Christmas party because I will be to pregnant to bake. I'm pregnant, not broken!
  • My boyfriends grandfather told me "you know you're gonna have to lose that weight after the baby" after I mentioned having a large breakfast. When I said he didn't need to tell me something I already was aware of, he disagreed saying he needed to. So I just flat out said I didn't think it was his business.
    I've gained ten pounds at 23 weeks I don't think I'm doing so bad I need advice damn it.
  • missphil said:

    Not innappropriate things people *say* but innappropriate things people *do*:

    Someone at work ate my lunch that was in the freezer. Yes, you heard me, someone ate the pregnant woman's lunch. Unbelievable!
    Luckily I had extra food that day but come on! It had my name on it!

    I'd be the a**hole to tell the entire office that someone ate my labeled lunch that was in the freezer. I'd ask who would be so rude and do that, and to a pregnant woman? Everyone would be talking about it damn it! Lol

    Reminds me of the ppl on the train thar SEE I'm pregnant but try not to make eye contact so they don't have to get up. I guess the McDonald's employee was right... I just look like my tummy is fat.. :-S
  • Oh and wtaf is with people and the unsolicited advice? My SO'S friends keep asking if we are having a lot of sex. They keep saying we should be so that labor will be easier. Ummm thanks for minding my panties guys!
  • Someone told me today
    "You're moving pretty well".
    Wierd.
    Also I work in open space and he said it.in front of 10 people.
  • I'm having a girl, but not telling anyone. The other day, I had three different people tell me they are "100% sure" I'm having a boy. They say this because I haven't gained weight anywhere but my bump, and because I am 'glowing' and girls take all your beauty. These are compliments, sure, but I hate when people act like know-it-alls and they're wrong. I'm grumpy.


    Listen, people, if you saw me without makeup you wouldn't wonder what I was having. I am actually a makeup wizard. You know what makes me glow? See below:


    For the record ~ this luminizer is amazing. I wear it everyday.
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