Food for thought.

wisco29 · August 2015

Not at all food related but it's a well written article from a nurse... Gives you something to think about before you make a huge ridiculous pregnancy plan to hand the nurses in the hospital or before you get overly demanding of them.

https://www.florenceisdead.com/2015/08/15/the-diet-coke-incident-also-known-as-the-mass-exodus-of-bedside-nurses/

I personally loved (most of) my nurses because they were there to help me do things I would never have imagined needing help doing.

AggieKim · August 2015

I'm a nurse and this was posted in my graduate class's Facebook group. I know many of the people in the various disciplines of nursing feel this way. Let me give you two perspectives: (and sorry this was long...)

1) Yes, we hate feeling like we're hosting a hotel room. Especially since I work in ICU and no, you are not entitled to have an infant come visit you. That is incredibly selfish anyways, because who really wants an infant in the land of germs (because, lets be honest, the place you will find the MOST antibiotic resistant bacteria will be the hospital...because that is where sick people go and we treat it with antibiotics.) And, no, you aren't entitled to sleep in the bed with your significant other when he/she is in the ICU! Sometimes an ICU patient is really healthy and just on observation because of the huge surgery that he/she just experienced, but, as much as I was guilty of getting in bed with my grandma when she was in the hospital, I didn't do it when she was in ICU. So yes, we get treated as though we are a service line purely for comfort, decadence, etc. Not a profession with highly trained skills, a deep set of knowledge about many things, not to mention the highly specific knowledge of all the years of working in the discipline we chose (for me, neuro).

2) I LOVE making my patients and their families happy. When the time is right, I will bend over backwards for you. I will Google restaurants, driving routes, phone numbers, call doctor's offices, etc to make sure you are taken care of. You know what? My ICU keeps various sodas on hand for patients and their family members (ok, probably more for patients, but, I'm in a neuro unit. If you are there with your family member, someone has more than likely had a brain tumor, an aneurysm, a stroke, or serious spine surgery. It is effing scary!). So, can I get you some water, as the patient's family member, to make you feel better? I'll get a soda, crackers and peanut butter for you. I found out my patient's wife was vegetarian by religion and was having a hard time finding truly vegetarian foods to eat around the hospital because, unfortunately, some of the vegetarian items offered weren't truly vegetarian...they were cooked in chicken broth or something like that. I stocked that woman up on as much peanut butter and crackers and vegetable broth I could. It was all I had at my disposal, but, hell, her husband was freaking sick (and sadly, ended up passing away much, much later due to all the complications he experienced). I don't regret one moment making exceptions for some of my patients' families. Because, as a patient, you NEED your family. Who is going to take care of you later when you go home? Lets not forget that the families go through extreme stress and need help too, but they're not admitted to the hospital.

Regarding Labor and Delivery, I know many of the nurses may feel like rolling their eyes at extremely detailed birth plans and glorious ideas. It isn't wrong to dream. Not at all. But I think ultimately they would ask you to be open minded. Ensure in your birth plan that there is wiggle room for reality to slip in. I really wanted to see how far med free I could get with my son. However, due to, I don't know, God joking with me or my hormones being flipping psycho, after I passed 40 weeks pregnant, severe anxiety set in (Asher was born 8 days after his due date). I didn't eat, drink, or barely sleep, despite taking benedryl as much as I could, for 4 days before my son was born. The nurse told me she had to run two liters (or 2 big IV bags) of fluid on me because I was dehydrated. So when the doc walked in to see me for the first time and said, "So, do you want an epidural? I looks like you're hurting." I said YES PLEASE! And I had the most relaxing, chill rest of the day while my body labored and I just rested. So when Asher was born, luckily after only 30 minutes of pushing, I was happy, barely noticed the day had passed, and the nurse helped me start nursing him right away. I can guarantee if I had actually tried to write out a birth plan (I resisted doing so because I was in denial I'd ever go into labor because he hadn't dropped and I had the perinatologist telling me I'd end up in a c-section, he was sure of it. He was wrong, too) it would have been thrown in the trash can immediately. And I had an easy pregnancy and labor.

So, as your nurse, I'm taking care of you, the patient, as well as any family member or friend who comes in. I will do my best to make your stay as pleasant as possible, despite the reason you're there (baby, sickness, etc). I don't want you to fear coming to my hospital if you need it. I need you to take care of yourself, and those around you to do so for you when you can't. But I need to be respected and trusted that if I say something, you can ask questions about how much of a hard stop that is, or if its more of a soft stop or recommendation, but I'm saying it with a reason. And you may or may not agree, but just at least entertain I might have had experience and you and I can work out what is best from you from both of our perspectives.

MamaFroFro · August 2015

I would never treat a nurse like a waitress/waiter/housecleaner/etc. but some people are just clueless jerks. You can find them in hospitals, restaurants, retail, finance, schools, they are every where. I don't think it's just a nurse issue unfortunately.

Also, I'm not making a birth plan. I have an idea of how I'd like it to go but really, you can hope in one hand and... We all know the saying

Fullerj21 · August 2015

My L&D and baby nurses with DD were Ah-mazing! Seriously the best, so informed, caring and attentive. I asked my mom and DH to bring them coffee, bagels, pizza etc to show our appreciation. The staff loved it and they truly deserved it.

wisco29 · August 2015

The only thing I took from online birth plan ideas were the phone numbers of family members in case of emergency, my pediatrician's information and a couple random other emergency things but I never gave It to the nurse I kept it in a folder in my bag. It was mostly for h just in case.

I told him 40 times who the pediatrician was etc but we all know they forget.

cantobean · August 2015

Yup, some people are clueless! I can't imagine treating a nurse that way. FIL has been hospitalized a few times recently for various things and he always insists we bring the nurses bagels, pizza, fruit baskets, etc. I think everyone can probably be a bit difficult when they are in serious pain or when they see a loved one very sick, but nurses are so amazing to put up with all that!

I don't think I'll have a birth plan. Like a few pp said, it'd be great if things went a certain way, but I am not foolish and I know labor can go any number of ways.

MississippiCatfish · August 2015

I'm a hospice RN and I hand out about a half dozen "diet cokes" to family members in any given shift. Most of us do. And most of us don't mind. It's when someone acts like that is the only thing you have to do until the doctor rounds and gives you a clue how to help the patient...that's when I'm done handing out diet cokes. To that particular family member on that particular day. And then it all starts over again the next shift...

I do agree that it is seen in almost every service profession. And in most professions dominated by women, unfortunately.

Zepplin1218 · August 2015

Running off of what Mississippicatfish said I've shadowed doctors quite a bit and honestly they are mostly adjusting medications and the plan of care when they round, often nothing gets changed at that moment. The majority of patient care comes from the nurses and they really know their stuff. They try so hard to care for their patients and get way more involved with them. Treating them poorly is just so self serving and terrible.

Don't think I will have a birthing plan either - the l&d nurses are so great. I know what I want from working there but I also know nothing goes just as planned so oh well!

PedsIsHardcore · August 2015

I am having a birth plan. It will say 3 things that I don't want and that's it.
I am bringing donuts for my nurses in L&D and my PP nurses. I am having them special made by a donut place that is open 24/7 so if we need more donuts we can get them! I always say please and thank you. I am a Peds nurse and I appreciate anyone caring for me and my child and in general dealing with my family...we are loud and Jewish.
The nurses where I'm delivering at work 12 hours and not a lot of people show appreciation for them because these nurses usually deal with people that are self centered and want to be waited on hand and foot. I have heard lots of horror stories about the hospital's labor and delivery team but I went on a tour yesterday and we are all on the same page to the point that the nurse and I want the same things as me and my SO and my OBGYN.
But I am going to make sure my nurses feel appreciated and that's why I always say please and thank you and the donuts. They get spread pretty thin sometimes so they don't always get their lunch breaks or get to go to the bathroom when they need to. I want to be an easy patient for them because I am high risk so its extra work for them.

MrsJG3 · August 2015

With my last two births, my nurses were amazing, every single one. My first experience was so awful that I was so incredibly grateful for my next two. I worked a lot with nurses in social work and just like us they were overworked and under appreciated. I actually look forward to seeing them again when I have this baby.

ashton2190 · August 2015

With my mom being a nurse, I can attest to them being some of the most amazing and selfless people. My mom will do anything for her patients (she works in oncology so her patients typically aren't doing well). She's had patients ask for things they thought were impossible and my mom made it happen. Two examples that I can think of were when a patient just wanted a beer. They were on their deathbed and all they wanted was a beer. My mom got that poor patient a beer and they were so grateful and happy. Another was when someone wanted to see their dog for the last time. My mom told security that this person's dog was coming in and if they had a problem with it, they could bring it up with her personally (she's only 5 feet tall but no one messes with that woman). They got to cuddle with their dog in their final moments.

I'm not saying my mom is a saint, I'm just saying she's a excellent example of the amazing people nurses are

Food for thought.

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