Fussy Breastfed Newborn

cseley321 · August 2015

I'm sure this question has been asked a thousand different ways, but I'm not sure what to do to help my baby out. I'm a FTM and the baby is only 4 days old. She was born a week late via C section, and is a VERY hungry baby in general. She was able to latch immediately after birth and is always doing hunger signals and/or sucking on her hand. We had to start giving her a pacifier on her 2nd day because we couldn't make her relax and sleep. She absolutely refuses to be put down to sleep and just constantly cries if she's not being held and/or fed. I'm starting to get worried that she just does NOT sleep. The best way we can get her to sleep is skin to skin, but we're both so tired that I'm scared that we will fall asleep and she will roll off of us or something bad.

Anyway long story short, I had the same questions while in the hospital and always got varying answers. My theory is that since my milk hasn't come in all the way (it just started to come in some late last night), she is not satisfying her hunger pains. We started supplementing some formula (one of the little similac bottles) to try and ease her pain. This seemed to be working okay but last night she still continued to fuss OR if we got her to sleep, she would instantly wake up if we put her down in her bed or moved her.

Any advice is more than welcome. I knew that having a newborn would be difficult but I just feel like I'm missing something here. Should I start supplementing more until I can get my supply to catch up? I've been feeding pretty much every hour or less (15-30 minutes per breast, depending on if she falls asleep nursing), sometimes I stretch it to two hours if she is sleeping or calm. I don't want to overdo it on the supplementing but also I want my baby to be happy and comfortable.

Seed0824 · August 2015

Also a FTM and I met with the hospitals lactation consultant who showed me the correct way for me personally to hold my breast and baby so that she's getting the best feeding. Of course there could be a ton of other reasons but she is sleeping for 3 hours at a time after each feeding. I know my hospital has a free support group weekly with the lactation consultants so maybe you could find something like this or la leche league group. There might be a simple trick to help.

carleym93 · August 2015

Your milk coming in should help with the hunger pains and cues, but what is baby sleeping in? Mine sleeps best in my arms and when we would put her in the bassinet, she was awake within an hour, usually less. We've since let her sleep in the Rock n Play, and she sleeps much better and much longer. It keeps her at an incline and nice and snuggled. You may look at letting her sleep in something else.

cseley321 · August 2015

She slept in a bassinet at the hospital and tonight was our first night home. We are having a hard time even getting her to sleep long enough to even make it to the bassinet. We tried putting her in a swing/glider but it only worked once for like an hour

andreaj33 · August 2015

Hi! I'm having the same issues. My little one is 3 weeks old now. They think he is having acid reflux which is why he struggles during feeding and why he has difficulty sleeping. The rock n play really helped. We don't rock him in it yet. The movement wakes him up. But the incline is super helpful for reflux and he sleeps longer. Swaddling at night really helps too. He's also taking Zantac and gas drops. Not sure if the meds are helping yet. I think he's also colicky. My LO cries almost anytime he's awake so it's a struggle but we're trying to make him as comfy and happy as possible.

benmel31 · August 2015

Her wanting to nurse is her instinct to try to stimulate your milk. I would let her nurse. It is ok to hold her to sleep at times. Keep trying different locations. My DS is loving the bouncy seat right now. Also, have you tried swaddling her? I am not good at just using a blanket. I like the ones with Velcro. She's only 4days, it may take longer to adjust to not being inside of you.

jessandandy09 · August 2015

some babies just need a lot of TLC for a while. My first newborn didn't sleep for the first 6 months of her life! I thought I was going crazy. She would only sleep held on my chest. This caused a lot of small naps for momma and the feeling that I was going insane. Your milk is going to take a while to catch up to baby, but LO needs to keep nursing to teach your breasts what her demands are. less nursing = less milk production. I know its tough, hang in there momma. One of the golden rules is the 4S's. swaddle, side, shush and suck. So swaddle LO at night, hold her on her side or lay her on her side, shush her (they love the noise because it sounds like the inside of your womb and let them suck on their hands or a pacy or your breast.

Keep the room very dark, this is soothing to LO's as they are used to the dark interior of your womb. Keep back ground white noise on if you can, this is also like the interior of your womb. I wish you the best as I know this time is difficult.

emmacake08 · August 2015

It sounds similar to what happened with me and my overdue newborn. LO was fine and nursing the first 24 hours and then just started screaming and popping off and fussing. After troubleshooting everything we could, I decided to start formula which she gulped down (30mL at 24 hours old). I then started to religiously pump (10 minutes every 2 hours) to make sure my milk came in. Once my milk came in on day 4, I was finally able to completely take her off formula and use BM in bottles. For me, it's a combination of her being unusually hungry for her age and not enough cheek strength to empty a breast yet. I had all of this confirmed with an LC. I have firm breast tissue and large nipples so it just takes a few more week for LO to get the hang of it. I'm glad I supplemented because she was just starving. I also though knew that BF is very important to me so the pumping has helped bring the milk in and feed her now. As long as you pump regularly and have LO practice nursing, supplementing souldn't affect your supply of you need to do it in the beginning colostrum phase.

diesel115 · August 2015

@Crystal321 I feel like I could have written your original post almost verbatim. DS was born Monday and yesterday was our first day home from the hospital. He has not had any problems latching and my milk started to come in yesterday. He is constantly doing hunger signals as well. Last night was extremely difficult. As soon as he was done eating and fell asleep at my breast I would try to put him to sleep in the rock n play next to our bed and he would be crying within 3 minutes or less. He was swaddled but it did not seem to help. I fed him in the side lying position constantly switching sides all night long and now am at a loss for what to do and not looking forward to tonight. I know newborns are difficult but it can't be healthy for him to be getting so little sleep. We have a home visit from a lactation consultant tomorrow morning, and I can update if I find out any tips that may help if you'd like. Hope things start getting better for both of us very soon.

hitcj4687 · August 2015

I have to pump before I can feed him because he can't get his tiny little mouth around my swollen boobs. It does help tho, then I have some extra milk to freeze. My little guy didn't sleep at all last night and moving around to get him what he needed after this c section is not fun! Today I'm going to try to keep him awake as much as possible in hopes that he might actually sleep tonight.! Good luck to you

usernameneededallaretaken · August 2015

hitcj4687 said:
Today I'm going to try to keep him awake as much as possible in hopes that he might actually sleep tonight.! Good luck to you

Be careful that this doesn't overstimulate and make him "overtired" -- that makes sleeping just as difficult. Good luck!

Starynightsky24 · August 2015

Baby is likely frustrated that your milk isn't in yet. As PPs have said, I would try to let baby nurse as much as possible. As hard as it is, it'll help tremendiousky when your milk does come in.

DS was like this a lot. It took 5 days for my milk to come in. Sometimes I would put a few drops of formula on my nipple to help him latch and suck better. It will get better!

"Avoid unnecessary supplements. Do not supplement baby with anything (formula, water, etc) unless it is medically indicated. Supplementing will do two things – missing feedings will reduce breast stimulation and milk removal (both needed to increase milk supply), and babies who are supplemented tend to need to eat again later than if they had nursed – so again you’re losing much-needed nursing time."

https://kellymom.com/ages/newborn/newborn-concerns/c-section/

kat+1 · August 2015

Look at this as a 4th " trimester"
Babe just needs to be on boob and near boob 24/7 some days are going to be better or worse just just got to roll with babe.
If babe wants to be held and your sleepy try having hubby do skin to skin

cseley321 · August 2015

benmel31 said:
Her wanting to nurse is her instinct to try to stimulate your milk. I would let her nurse. It is ok to hold her to sleep at times. Keep trying different locations. My DS is loving the bouncy seat right now. Also, have you tried swaddling her? I am not good at just using a blanket. I like the ones with Velcro. She's only 4days, it may take longer to adjust to not being inside of you.

Yeah she loves being swaddled but we were told not to leave her sleeping like that after leaving the hospital. We have been swaddling her though sometimes as we try and soothe her

cseley321 · August 2015

diesel115 said:
@Crystal321 I feel like I could have written your original post almost verbatim. DS was born Monday and yesterday was our first day home from the hospital. He has not had any problems latching and my milk started to come in yesterday. He is constantly doing hunger signals as well. Last night was extremely difficult. As soon as he was done eating and fell asleep at my breast I would try to put him to sleep in the rock n play next to our bed and he would be crying within 3 minutes or less. He was swaddled but it did not seem to help. I fed him in the side lying position constantly switching sides all night long and now am at a loss for what to do and not looking forward to tonight. I know newborns are difficult but it can't be healthy for him to be getting so little sleep. We have a home visit from a lactation consultant tomorrow morning, and I can update if I find out any tips that may help if you'd like. Hope things start getting better for both of us very soon.

That would be awesome. Please feel free to share any pointers!

cseley321 · August 2015

emmacake08 said:
It sounds similar to what happened with me and my overdue newborn. LO was fine and nursing the first 24 hours and then just started screaming and popping off and fussing. After troubleshooting everything we could, I decided to start formula which she gulped down (30mL at 24 hours old). I then started to religiously pump (10 minutes every 2 hours) to make sure my milk came in. Once my milk came in on day 4, I was finally able to completely take her off formula and use BM in bottles. For me, it's a combination of her being unusually hungry for her age and not enough cheek strength to empty a breast yet. I had all of this confirmed with an LC. I have firm breast tissue and large nipples so it just takes a few more week for LO to get the hang of it. I'm glad I supplemented because she was just starving. I also though knew that BF is very important to me so the pumping has helped bring the milk in and feed her now. As long as you pump regularly and have LO practice nursing, supplementing souldn't affect your supply of you need to do it in the beginning colostrum phase.

I think this is the route I'm going to take at night for now. We were trying to supplement no more than one bottle but she just isn't getting what she needs. I finally got her to sleep at 10 today and called my mom over to watch her so I could finally rest for the first time since Saturday lol. Here we go to round 2 though

amk013 · August 2015

I'd call your pediatrician. Mine said to call if my LO had any inconsolable crying. I'd just be cautious, and that's what they're there for!

J&D2007 · August 2015

In my vast experience with newborns (7 days), I found that the 'hunger cue' of hands in mouth isn't necessarily a hunger cue for my LO. He has his hands I his mouth constantly and it doesn't mean he's hungry. I find that he constantly tries to put his hands in his mouth but can't control them real well so he gets really frustrated. I do swaddle him with his arms in for naps to prevent his frustration, even though the hospital said not to. He sleeps a lot better. I find that the Summer swaddlers work great because they don't ride up at all and I don't worry about them covering his mouth. Also, I found nursing to be extremely difficult and painful before my milk came in. LO was frustrated and hungry but it got better once he had some real food.

emmacake08 · August 2015

Once we started supplementing, my LO slept well and was back to being happy. Now that my milk is in from pumping, she's getting only BM in bottles so the supplementing never impacted my supply, just kept me afloat until I had enough milk. Last feeding she had 4 oz of BM! Now I don't feel so bad for going this route. I'm hoping to get her back on the boob when she's ready (crossing fingers it's in the next few weeks [-O< ). I hope your ravenous LO gives you a break! Just make sure you stay on top of your pumping so you don't lose your supply.

Also, I've never heard that swaddling at night is bad. You aren't supposed to once LO can roll but as newborns it's fine. I don't know what I'd do if I wasn't allowed to swaddle! It's been a lifesaver!

jabeauty90 · August 2015

DS#1 was like this, the easiest thing for me was to side-lie breastfeed and sleep a little while baby nursed and slept.

SashaDenn25 · August 2015

emmacake08 said:
Once we started supplementing, my LO slept well and was back to being happy. Now that my milk is in from pumping, she's getting only BM in bottles so the supplementing never impacted my supply, just kept me afloat until I had enough milk. Last feeding she had 4 oz of BM! Now I don't feel so bad for going this route. I'm hoping to get her back on the boob when she's ready (crossing fingers it's in the next few weeks [-O< ). I hope your ravenous LO gives you a break! Just make sure you stay on top of your pumping so you don't lose your supply.

Also, I've never heard that swaddling at night is bad. You aren't supposed to once LO can roll but as newborns it's fine. I don't know what I'd do if I wasn't allowed to swaddle! It's been a lifesaver!

This. Im confused. It looks like 2 different people were told not to swaddle?? My LO sleeps best and at her longest stretches when swaddled. She takes a long nap at about 12 -1230 everyday until about 3-330 and I swaddle her for it and then again at night. She is sleeping for 3.5 - 4 hour stretches at night swaddled. When not swaddled she may sleep an hour at most.

firstxmommy361 · August 2015

I'm going through this right now!! My LO is 2 weeks old and will sleep in her bouncer during the day but at night, will only sleep in my arms. I understand the dangers in this but my mommy instincts never let me fall into a deep sleep and she's out for 4 hours. I BF but also supplement at times because she just can't get enough to eat sometimes. She's acting like she's always hungry and ends up overdoing it even with constant burping breaks. They don't know their limits yet..just find something that works for you and baby..i'm about to try a swing for at night (fingers crossed)

cseley321 · August 2015

jabeauty90 said:
DS#1 was like this, the easiest thing for me was to side-lie breastfeed and sleep a little while baby nursed and slept.

I tried this for the first time today and it helped SOOO much. I highly recommend it for anyone with large boobs especially

cseley321 · August 2015

SashaDenn25 said:

emmacake08 said:
Once we started supplementing, my LO slept well and was back to being happy. Now that my milk is in from pumping, she's getting only BM in bottles so the supplementing never impacted my supply, just kept me afloat until I had enough milk. Last feeding she had 4 oz of BM! Now I don't feel so bad for going this route. I'm hoping to get her back on the boob when she's ready (crossing fingers it's in the next few weeks [-O< ). I hope your ravenous LO gives you a break! Just make sure you stay on top of your pumping so you don't lose your supply.

Also, I've never heard that swaddling at night is bad. You aren't supposed to once LO can roll but as newborns it's fine. I don't know what I'd do if I wasn't allowed to swaddle! It's been a lifesaver!
This. Im confused. It looks like 2 different people were told not to swaddle?? My LO sleeps best and at her longest stretches when swaddled. She takes a long nap at about 12 -1230 everyday until about 3-330 and I swaddle her for it and then again at night. She is sleeping for 3.5 - 4 hour stretches at night swaddled. When not swaddled she may sleep an hour at most.

Yah we were all about the swaddling and my husband got really good at it but on discharge they said not to do it so my husband wants to cut her off.

carleym93 · August 2015

She may just need to feel secure. My kid just purple faced screamed her head off for over an hour. Wouldn't take the boob, didn't want to be rocked, etc. I laid her down with me and pulled her in to me as tightly as I could and bounced her a little and she passed out instantly. The nurse in the hospital when I delivered said, "You're the only person she has ever known her entire life. Her need for you is going to take a while to go away." So in the meantime, I'm enjoying the extra cuddles, even if it means I lose sleep.

Baby2HG · August 2015

I still swaddle. Always did with my first.

diesel115 · August 2015

Crystal321 said:

jabeauty90 said:
DS#1 was like this, the easiest thing for me was to side-lie breastfeed and sleep a little while baby nursed and slept.
I tried this for the first time today and it helped SOOO much. I highly recommend it for anyone with large boobs especially

Doing this terrifies me, but I'm glad to know
I'm not the only one who has done it.

buckleyk · August 2015

Personally I'd be careful suppenting too much or your supply will never catch up. BF-ing works on supply and demand. The more baby takes out, the more your body will know to make. If you supplement you'll trick your body into thinking it's making enough when that's not the case. Just let her nurse as long and often as she wants to build your supply. And if you do give a bottle, I'd pump so that your body doesn't get the idea your skipping a feeding or you baby doesn't need as much. Make sure your staying well Hydrated- that will help too!

Also, something I found interesting that the LC explained after I had my first was that babies inside the womb have their needs met 24/7. They never feel hungry or have to wait for a meal. It's like sitting at thanksgiving table all the time! Once they're born, they feel hungry and get scared that they don't know where their next meal is coming from and panic. She suggested nursing at the first sings of hunger because angry/ hungry/ fussing babies aren't as efficient nursers.

WDDCH · August 2015

carleyec93 said:
She may just need to feel secure. My kid just purple faced screamed her head off for over an hour. Wouldn't take the boob, didn't want to be rocked, etc. I laid her down with me and pulled her in to me as tightly as I could and bounced her a little and she passed out instantly. The nurse in the hospital when I delivered said, "You're the only person she has ever known her entire life. Her need for you is going to take a while to go away." So in the meantime, I'm enjoying the extra cuddles, even if it means I lose sleep.

This exactly!

I see a recurring theme in all these comments. There's nothing "wrong" with baby. She simply wants to be held because all she has been is held. She'll grow in independence. For now do what you need to in order to help her feel secure (hold her, wear her). It won't last, promise.

buckleyk · August 2015

^^ goes along with the idea that you can't spoil a newborn. They're only crying if something isn't right and they really mean it. They don't yet know to cry for attention.

cseley321 · August 2015

Just a quick update, pretty sure my milk came in and she has been awesome all day. We will see what tonight has in store for us but she's been eating and sleeping great and has only cried for diaper changes. I think it was just the hunger pains making her so angry.

I haven't had to supplement yet today, but I made sure to pump afterward when I supplemented the past two nights and it seems like my supply is catching up to her just fine. Also she is eating much better now that I changed my position while feeding. I was doing football hold in the hospital but now I'm laying on my side.

breezymeema7 · August 2015

Swaddle for life!!!

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