Biggest change when becoming a mom?

serenityuy01 · August 2015

So as of today I am exactly two weeks from my due date and it's really starting to hit me that my LO could be here anytime now. I'm so excited but it's also such a crazy concept to wrap my head around. For those experienced and also recently new moms out there what's the biggest change you have felt or noticed since becoming a parent and is it different than what you thought it would be?

Elizabeth043086 · August 2015

For me honestly it is just how damn busy you are. I mean, I expected almost every aspect of it except that literally every second of every day is go go go. There is NO more down time. Like with a new baby, the second you think you have a second, boom baby needs something else. That was surprising to me. I didn't think it would be impossible to go poop without the baby needing something while you were in there. lol

jkjdd · August 2015

For me it was similar to the last response. Your time is no longer your own. A shower, eating and going to the bathroom becomes a luxury. But it's worth it!

thinkpink101 · August 2015

That very little is about you anymore. It's especially a stark contrast since during pregnancy people tend to makes a big fuss over the MTB, and then all of a sudden it will be all about the baby. It can be hard not to lose your own identity because obviously the baby will always come first. My first was tough for me because none of my friends were even thinking of having babies, so it was lonely before I made mom friends that had a lifestyle more like mine. I also felt selfish spending anything on myself (go to Sephora or put money in baby's college fund...). It takes a while to strike a balance. With three kids I've been just "mom" for the past 10 years, so adding a fourth probably won't change that much.

thefuturemrsdaniel · August 2015

How much you will worry and protect that baby. I remember going to lunch with my mom in view of the hospital and just bring so worried about him. He was in NICU so he was in the best care but still. I remember her telling me "get used to it. This will happen for the rest of your life even when they have kids of their own" . It hit me again last night . He's almost 3 and it was raining and storming. He was right across the hall but I had this urge to just go get him so he was near me. It just amazes me how you could love something you just met so much.
Also how impossible it is to get mad at them. Even when they are being a toddler and repeating everything a hundred times you just look at them and smile. Strangest thing ever haha

jennahkross · August 2015

I have never in my life felt a love like I do for my first, it is indescribable!! That was the most wonderful change for me. The hardest part was thinking I was going to just go back to my "normal" self after the baby was born, and obviously that doesn't happen right away. I struggled with being a mom and still being myself, but I figured it out eventually.:) Its very difficult to describe what happens, until you go through it yourself!

WDDCH · August 2015

I am nodding and agreeing with all the above, as I read them! For me the biggest change was also that sacrificial love. You will not have to lovingly sacrifice so much as you do when you have a child. And that love, and those sacrifices, change as your child grows.

When you have a newborn you are like a momma grizzly. You may not FEEL it...... until someone does or says something that you really don't like to/about baby. Heck you're a momma grizzly throughout their childhood but it changes as they grow and they find themselves, becoming more their own person and individual.

My relationship to my eldest isn't the same as when she was an infant anymore. I will still make sacrifices for her but not all the time. She is growing up and has to make some choices for herself. I wil always sacrifice my spending money in order to make sure my kids are fed, for instance. But the American Girl doll she wants? She's saving up for it herself (and at age 10 she's already saved up over $40 and is super proud of herself).

Not sure that's a good example of how it changes lol. I am just saying that when you have a brand new baby, that baby is so integrated into your life that it can be hard to not lose your own identity. But it also won't always be that way.

ForeverEverAfter · August 2015

For me the biggest change was my interests. I simply didn't want to do the same things as before. I had pictured baby sleeping at my side while sewing, or on my back while gardening, but really I spent most of my time doing baby things (dinners with other parent friends, play groups, etc). Even my reading, I used to love fiction, now I would rather read Montessori or cognitive psychology. And instead of following blogs on sewing and budgeting, I follow things on babywearing and cloth diapering. I became a lot closer to my friends with kids, and all of our close friends are settled down (at least married, most with kids or trying), so I'm still social. I just never expected to be so engaged in mothering.

ElleMF728 · August 2015

I think for me it was just the full time nature of being a parent which I never truly understood until I became a mom. The first time I was up all night with the flu, sleeping in DS's nursery because he also had the flu and getting sick in between numerous sheet changes was when it hit me. It didn't matter how sick I was or how exhausted I was, he still needed me on my A game so that he could be taken care of and comforted.

Its putting someone else well being ahead of your own and learning to be selfless. Its being excited and smiling and laughing for your baby even when you feel like crap and learning how to take a "relaxing" shower while avoiding stepping on your toddler who is playing with his matchbox cars under your feet.

Also, the amount of stuff I always have with me whenever I leave the house! Snacks, toys, diapers, wipes, wraps, stroller, binkies....its never ending I swear.

jbettles · August 2015

It's an adjustment to think about baby before planning anything at all. Will you take them or have someone watch them for you? What time of day will be the least stressful? If you stay at a hotel, packing appropriate items... Etc, etc. It feels normal now bc I have a daughter already, but I remember just being blown away by having to think of every little detail before doing something as simple as running to Target!

ktbkitten · August 2015

I agree with all of these PP. Nothing is ever the same after having a kid and I wouldn't change it for anything. My biggest change was the worry that I have for my son. I never understood how much you could love something and how important they would be to you. And now with a second one I realized that I am not going to split that love and worry between two, it's just going to be doubled! AH!

jabeauty90 · August 2015

For me it would be managing time. Trying to plan out my day around a baby. Now it's trying to plan things around three children and my SO. Juggling my time is still a struggle. I have a calendar of events, dinner menu for the week, shopping list, etc just so I can prepare for things.

serenityuy01 · August 2015

Love the responses ladies!

rebeccabloomwood · August 2015

I think the biggest thing that changed for me was my relationship with DH. He was always my rock but I've needed him in a way that is indescribable since DD1 was born. We have our tough times but being parents has made us such a team. He has stepped up to being a father in ways I didn't even know I needed him.

sararegine · August 2015

My mother told me before DD1 was born that once she would come into my life I would never feel alone again. And she was right. I've never been someone who is lonely but bringing into this world another person that is your flesh and blood adds a whole other level of completeness I never thought possible, considering how close I am to my husband. The other big change was becoming a lioness when it came to baby. The first few months I would literally go beserk if I sensed anyone was doing something that could potentially harm DD. Flash forward to 5 yrs later and the other BIG permanent change that has stayed is poor time management. I used to be super punctual and now I am ALWAYS late, no matter how much I plan ahead, DD always throws me a curve ball that causes my schedule to go off tangent. Can't imagine what will happen with 2 DDs!

agiroir · August 2015

There's absolutely nothing that can prepare you for the flood of emotions you feel. My poor girl has such a hard time burping and her belly will hurt her really bad and it breaks my heart to see her in pain and know there's nothing I can do about it. Also seeing terrible things on the news (in my area they found brain eating amoeba in the water, so you can't get any bathing water up your nose) the worry is never ending. It's very demanding having a newborn and most of the time I wonder if I'm doing it correctly but it's all goes away seeing her getting stronger every day.

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