Holiday celebrations, how will you handle it?

wlbmom2013 · August 2015

I am due 12/24. Hubby and I have had this discussion and we have decided on a solution. I want to know what other parents are doing.

Will you be taking your newborn to the holiday celebrations?

We decided that when Christmas comes, if the new little one is healthy and at least 2 weeks old, we will attend our family celebrations (only 20 min away) for a few hours (2-4 depending on how baby and I are doing). My husband's parents live almost 2 hours away and we usually go and spend a week with them, but we're not doing that this year. We are however, allowing visitors at any time a few days after we come home.

Do yall think this is reasonable? I think it's reasonable and very fair.

BostonBaby1 · August 2015

I think that you should see how you feel when the time comes. Some people have a much harder time postpartum than others. I think if you feel up for it, you should go ahead and do it… But cut yourself some slack if you don't.

SunnyD2015 · August 2015

I agree...You will have to see what you feel up to. It looks like you have a good plan in place.

ketobaby · August 2015

I agree with PP. You also need to take into consideration your body and how you are doing as well. I personally will not be attending any holiday events this year whether my son is born or not. Its only one year and I know I will not be up to long drives or being in someone else's house for an extended period of time.

Sunny2015 · August 2015

I'm only traveling for Thanksgiving. For Christmas my parents are going to come to me because I was really upset as Christmas is my favorite holiday, so we will just have a small celebration at my house

I have no idea what to do about the in laws though.

VesperLove · August 2015

I think it's nice to have a plan in place but to also realize that all plans will likely go out the window once baby is here ... and it'll be a game time decision.

We also had to put some time and thought into the holidays. My inlaws are renewing their vows for their 40th anniversary on the 27th. We are due the 23rd ... so we have Christmas Eve (usually with his family), Christmas Day (usually with my family), and the vow renewal to consider.

We've basically told our family that we're doing Christmas at our house (not attending any celebrations at anyone's house) and they are welcome to visit us at home pending no issues with baby should he already be here. They seem fine with that and it leaves us open and flexible.

As for the vow renewal, I'm not planning on going. If baby is here, I'm likely not going to want to drive two hours north within the first two weeks. DH is welcome to go but I'll be staying home. If baby isn't here yet, I'm absolutely not going as that leaves me two hours further away from my hospital. DH is also welcome to still go, but I don't think he'd want to as I don't think he wants to be that far away with a pending labor. But who knows.

But, we also know that things could totally change and new plans could be made. We just wanted to make sure that our parents/families didn't have any expectations of us ... so if we did choose to participate, it would be a welcome surprise instead of our lack of participation being a let down.

Mizuiro007 · August 2015

Being due Dec 1 I'm more nervous about Thanksgiving. We usually go to either my aunt or cousin's house (both close enough I'll probably go as long as I'm feeling up to it and haven't already popped). Then we go to my grandma's house (same side) for a smaller, more relaxed gathering. It's the second that I look forward to most and seems most likely I'll have to skip as they live farther away than I want to be from the hospital.

Basically the same plans go for Christmas. My family is pretty laid back and was really accommodating when I had DS. I went a little stir crazy early on and did a lot of visiting to get out of the house. They didn't expect me to do or bring anything so I was able to just relax and visit. Cousins have had babies and we all worked around what was easiest for them so I didn't feel guilty. It was nice and I'm hoping for the same this Christmas. I'm also trying to keep an open mind though that we don't know what will happen, even that the last couple years my aunt has canceled Christmas gatherings due to weather.

momotheflyinglemur · August 2015

I am in your same boat, I am due the 20th, but every baby in my family has been late. I have already made it clear to close family to let extended family know that our new family circle will not be attending Christmas celebrations outside our home this year. Direct family may come and visit us as long as they are healthy and have planned with us in advance. This is my first child and Christmas in our family is an ordeal. Both sides are HUGE and live in the city. There are always big events going on from Christmas Eve to New Years.

Neither SO or I want to play the reindeer games this year. lol

ChiccoBeanz · August 2015

I'm due Dec 13th. My mom's side lives in the same complex as us. So that's no biggie and I'm sure some family will be going to fla bc my cousin is due the same day, and some will stay with me. As far as in-laws, we will play that by ear. They are welcome to my house and my mom's though.

redfallon · August 2015

Due 12/22. Not going anywhere for Christmas. Not sure about Thanksgiving yet. My family has an annual reunion the Saturday after Thanksgiving. However, it's 6+ hours drive away and that will be within 30 days of my due date. I don't think I'll want to be in a car for that long at that time. I've thrown the idea around with DH about having Thanksgiving here at our house this year - as long as it's a small one.

RSB1982 · August 2015

I'm due 12/28 and we travel almost 8 hours away for holidays. So..... This year we'll be home. I'm not sure about Thanksgiving yet, will have to wait and see. No one has made any plans to come see us yet, I think it's still too early. I'm compleatly relaxed about the holidays this year, not worried at all. Whatever happens, happens. No one expects us to go out of our way to attend events.. we are having a baby after all!

Rynney1979 · August 2015

I'm due 12/26. We are doing Christmas at our house. His parents live 1.5 hrs north but I'm not going that far from the hospital...they may come down but even then I'm ok if it's just us. As this is our first and he's an only...I suspect they'll be down! My parents live a plane ride away, expect nothing but a phone call and we will see them in Jan. No idea what we are doing for Thanksgivkng yet.

raevanb · August 2015

I am also due 12/24 and we have decided to plan nothing haha. My mother will be coming up around the beginning of December and my dad will be coming up for the birth (both are doctors so I want them both there in case anything should go wrong). But other than that we are just planning on staying in. We live in St. Louis so the weather is pretty unpredictable that time of year too. My LO is weighing in at least a week ahead right now so we are at least hoping she is here before Christmas.

wlbmom2013 · August 2015

Thanks for the input. I am playing Thanksgiving by ear because I had my son at 34 weeks, so it's possible that the new little one will be early as well. Thanksgiving is actually my 36 week mark and I will be attending the Thanksgiving festivities as long as she's not here yet:) My family (where the gathering will be) is actually 20 min closer to my hospital than myself. I will however have my hospital bag packed and in the car

, just in case! I'll actually be packing that at about 30 or 32 weeks because last time I went to the hospital with NOTHING as I thought I would be sent home, since I was 34 weeks. .. WRONG! LOL!

dec15mum · August 2015

I'm due 12/12 and not going anywhere for Christmas, people can visit us by all means but I'm not willing to push myself to make others happy

chewie5990 · August 2015

We are spending Christmas Eve with DH side of the family which will be local and then planning on driving about 3 hours Christmas Day to visit with my side of the family. As long as baby doesn't come too late this will be the plan...will probably change if baby is a week a late...We will be staying for about 2 weeks and baby and I may stay one more week after DH has to go back home to work. My family is spread all over and Christmas is the only time we all get together so it is important to me that I make every effort in making it happen. Family is extremely important to both me and DH and neither of us could imagine not being around our families for the holidays.

kcas123 · August 2015

I'm due December 30. My mom is a maternity nurse and her house is less then 5 minutes from the hospital I'm delievering at. My aunts and parents rotate houses for thanksgiving and Christmas every year and it just so happens that both are at my parents house this year. So we will be there. Unless of course baby is here, then I'll probably just be at my house with my SO and baby. We're just going to go with the flow!

rockinmathchic · August 2015

I'm a STM and my first was delivered 5 weeks early. Given this, we have a plan, but we are remaining flexible should things "happen". I am due 30 Dec. Our plan right now is to do Thanksgiving as normal, visiting whichever side of our family has their turn this year (unfortunately, I don't remember who we visited last

) ). This is 5 weeks before my due date but both sets of parents are local enough that it wouldn't be a problem if something happened. Christmas we are planning on staying home regardless of what happens. If you want to see us or the new baby (if she's here by the 25th), you can come over and visit. We will not be preparing anything or having anything planned, so don't expect a show. We are going to do this regardless of whether or not DD makes her appearance before the 25th.

hummingbird35 · August 2015

@chiccobeanz I'm due the 13th too!!

I'm not sure what we'll be doing! I'm thinking we'll visit immediate family or have them come to us (we all live in St. Louis) but I'm wary because I'm only making it a priority that immediate caregivers (grandmas and my sister) get TDAP and flu vaccines. We'll probably spend about a half hour with others. I'd rather just stay home but I think he should see his great grandmother (not sure how long he'll have with her). Still up in the air til we get closer to crunch time!

ktc18 · August 2015

I'm due 12/4. I have already told absolutely everyone that my baby and I will not be attending any holiday celebrations and we will not be having any holiday celebrations at our house for family.
I'm not taking my baby to my chain smoking in laws and my family goes south for the winter.

kimb311 · August 2015

Due 12/12 and haven't given it any thought. I usually host thanksgiving and Christmas. Thanksgiving will be very small this year and we haven't even talked about Christmas, I'm more concerned that I, I mean "Santa" starts her shopping and wrapping for DD early this year.

dientje · August 2015

I love that you guys are ready to attend parties and holiday events. My DD is the 7th and me and baby don't plan on seeing the light of day until maybe January lol....p.s.my birthday is the 22nd

rmarie13 · August 2015

DH does not want to make any sort of plan! It's frustrating. EDD is 12/18 and I know I'm not going to want to go anywhere. I'd like to let his family know our plans so they don't expect us but he's obviously not on the same page, yet.

raq_2020 · August 2015

We are doing as little as possible!! Christmas eve is always spent with my family (siblings, parents, niece) so they'll all come to us this year... Otherwise i don't plan on going anywhere or doing anything! I'm really looking forward to that. We're also planning on giving primarily gift cards for presents because I looooove gift giving and stress every year about giving "the perfect gift"

elbou · August 2015

We rotate who we spend Christmas day with...IL's, then my family, then a year home with just us. As luck would have it, it's our year to be home for Christmas, so I don't think either side is really expecting us to show up. I don't mind having family come to us to visit the new addition if she/he is here by then (EDD is 12/18)...as long as they bring the food! I'm not a big fan of cooking regardless, so I'm going to suggest a potluck meal if we end up hosting dinner. Our families usually do that anyways, so I'm sure they won't mind. Not sure yet about the family dinner that my side usually does, but it is often held after Christmas anyways, so will probably end up making the same suggestion I already mentioned for that event.

tewinkle27 · August 2015

I love the holidays! We're doing thanksgiving at our house, a week and two days before my due date(due 12/5) DD came a week early so I'm hoping to be around for thanksgiving. As for Christmas I plan on seeing both sides of the family! Depending on weather. SO's family is about 40 minutes away and Wisconsin winters can really suck.

trinna321 · August 2015

I'm due on 12/23. Due to prev cs, doc wants to schedule one week early, which I'm on the fence about. Not stressing too much though, deal with it then. However I do not want my newborn exposed to people during cold/flu season. My immediate family will vaccinate, but those showing up with sniffles and sneezes, no thank you. Sad to miss all the fun, older kids can go with daddy to gramma's. But I'm staying home with LO.

rxredhead · August 2015

I'm due Dec 6th and plan on hosting a big family Christmas at our house. I don't want to travel with a newborn but I tend to go stir crazy in the first few days or weeks after I have a baby so I welcome the thought of people coming to visit. There'll be rules about hand sanitizer and sick people staying away from the newborn, but that's just common sense. I'm hoping to have my in-laws up for a low-key Thanksgiving because my parents will be out of town and I'm terrified of going into labor and not having someone to watch my older kids. I also expect to have my baby on the early side, quite possibly before Thanksgiving. Both my previous kids were born at 37w5d and this one is IUGR and I'm considered high risk at this point so I'm expecting I'll wind up being induced before 40 weeks

rxredhead · August 2015

I also can never get more than a random day or two off work around Christmas (frequently work either Christmas Eve or Day) so I'm looking forward to the fact I'll have the whole season off this year

groovylocks · August 2015

We're going to wing it. We have never been parents before so I can't give much in the way of insight except to play it by ear. You'll know when the time comes.

To answer your question, yes. Your plans sound reasonable to me.

NellieHarringtonCarter · August 2015

Your plan sounds spot on. I'm pretty much in the same boat as everyone else. This year, we were supposed to have Christmas Eve and Christmas at my dad and mom's houses, respectively, both of which are about 3 hours away, but since I'm due around the 21st, probably staying put. And my in-laws live about 2 hours away, so I'm not sure if they will come down, or anyone in my family will come down. My mom at least might. I don't I've ever had a Christmas without family around, given the impending baby, it might actually be relaxing, just me, hubby and daughter, waiting for or enjoying the new addition! Or maybe a little lonely.

celainev · August 2015

I'm due dec 30th and plan to attend all Christmas events!! I love Christmas too much to think about not being apart of it. I have asked my MIL to change her regular tradition of going up to her cabin in the woods for a week and instead having her family dinners at her own house an hour away. She was totally up for it because it would mean I'd stay closer to the hospital.

mltarrio · August 2015

I think your plan sounds solid, but I agree with some of the other ladies, play it by ear.

I am due Christmas Day, and we usually travel, (a few hours away at most), but this year we are hosting Christmas at our house for my parents and my in-laws. I told everyone that they needed to get a hotel, (our apartment is too small for people to stay), so I feel like I have already started setting the boundaries. The plan is to cook and eat a delicious roast beef dinner and hopefully the baby will wait and come the next day. I wish I could predict when the baby will come, because that would make planning easier. I will feel terrible if everyone comes for Christmas and I am in the hospital, but what can you do besides be flexible?

Nycbk · August 2015

We usually spend thanksgiving with my family and Christmas at my in laws. This year it was first discussed that my in laws would come to us. I'm due 12/23. But then after picturing my MIL being there if I go into labor I told my DH things would be said by me that wouldn't be pretty and I wouldn't be able to take back ie leave me alone and shut up. So we decided to make both families happy my DH and I are both going to our own parents houses for thanksgiving so they each get their child for a holiday and then for Christmas we are just spending it the two (or maybe three depending) of us. At the end of the day it's close enough to Christmas that I know both families will get to see us at that time but I just don't need to deal with hosting them on Christmas.

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