PPD?

victoriaaa1 · August 2015

i don't know what's going on with me but for the past 2-3 days I'm just extremely frustrated about everything and life itself . I'm thinking about things from the past , things happening in the moment and the future and it's taking a toll on my emotions . But I always been like this so I don't think it's ppd?
I've always said I've had depression but it's just never been diagnosed by a professional . My mother has depression and years back I've explained the way I feel and she suggested I go see someone to get medicine, but I don't want to do that depression meds are the worse . The side effects are something I don't want to deal with nor can I , I have a baby go take care of . (Since depression meds make you sleep all day and it's a "mask" to make to "Feel" happy when you know you're not . I've heard makes you feel like crap)

When I look at my baby all my problems go away but I'm using him as a wall to hide everything.
(I don't and will never think of hurting my baby if anything he's helping me)

So I don't know what to do. DH doesn't know and I know I wouldn't be able to talk to him about it , it's just a complicated situation for me and it something I always keep to myself .

I'm also 2 weeks pp, is it too late to get ppd? Or can it just be my depression?

jessandandy09 · August 2015

it's not too late and you need to talk to your doctor. Antidepressants don't just mask symptoms they actually work to balance out a deficit of neurotransmitter in your brain. Pair the right med with counseling and it can be life altering. PPD and just regular depression can be a very very very serious issue including being unsafe for your newborn. Please go talk to a doctor, explain your fears of medications and let him get you help.

benmel31 · August 2015

It is not too late, in fact I think it can even start later. If you are concerned, contact your OB. You will b asked about ppd at your 6w appointment but you can always contact them sooner.

xsunshinelady15 · August 2015

I think you should say all that you have said here to your OB so she can make a proper recommendation for you. Good luck.

archetypeblonde · August 2015

It will take a longer conversation than can be had on an Internet forum to determine the root of your problems and what you should do about them. But talking to your DH and seeing a professional will certainly help you find answers. Whether or not you receive an official diagnosis you should consult someone who can help you work through your emotions. But also understand that for this part of your life there is an especially wide range of "normal" emotional experiences. It's great that you're thinking of your emotional needs, you'll get through this! Good luck!

saroos3137 · August 2015

I've struggled with depression for nearly 10 years now. I've been off and on medication, and I have to say that now that I've found one that works well for me, it's a life saver. I stopped taking it when I found out I was pregnant, and just restarted about 2 weeks ago so that I don't fall back into PPD after baby arrives. They're not all bad with bad side effects - you just have to find one that works for you. If they're not for you, counseling can be a huge help. I saw a counselor for PPD when DS was 6 months old, and it helped a lot (for me, I also needed meds to get back to a good place).

PPD can happen at any time after a baby's birth. I've even heard of it being diagnosed when the child is 2 years old. I was ashamed to talk to my husband about my depression in the early stages of our relationship because he just does not understand depression. However, after finally opening up to him, he has been so extremely supportive. He was completely against meds until he saw the change they made in me, and although he still doesn't understand what it feels like to be depressed, he empathizes with what I'm going through and trusts me to make the best decision about my treatment.

JNOVA2015 · August 2015

You should talk to a doctor. If you are weary of meds, they can still help you diagnose the condition properly and can also help with non-medicinal monitoring and treatment. There are things you can do to esse depression or better cope other than taking a pill, but a professional should be involved so that you're properly diagnosed and, most importantly, your baby is safe.

Good luck! My dad has mental health issues and relies entirely on medication to treat (no therapy), and it's had a really detrimental effect on his quality of life. Good for you for wanting to avoid the medication side effects, but please make sure you're still taking care of yourself!

victoriaaa1 · August 2015

How do you go about bring something like that up to DH ? I'm in a way scared and ashamed . Why ? I don't know . @mommysar

saroos3137 · August 2015

@victoriaaa1 I honestly don't remember my first conversation about it with him. We were in college I think, and had been dating for a couple years. I think he saw me break down and at a low point, and was really concerned, so I opened up and told him I'd been dealing with it for a while. He's seen so many meltdowns and bad days, I think it's helped him to realize this is a real issue for me. When I decided to go back on medication after DS, it was after during a particularly bad day where he didn't want to be near me. I calmly sat down and told him that I wasn't getting better with therapy, and I wanted to try medication again as I thought it would be best for our whole family.

Since I'm not sure of your DH's position on depression, I would approach it like this: find a time where you're feeling calm and okay to talk about it openly. I think the way you explained your feelings above are a good way to open (it's something you've dealt with for awhile, dwelling on the past/future and it's taking a toll on you and your emotions). You don't have to use the word "depressed" if it makes you uncomfortable. You can still describe the way you're feeling. If your DH is like mine, he loves you and wants you to be happy, and will want to help you in any way he can.,

Good luck. I'm happy to talk more, also, if you'd like.

victoriaaa1 · August 2015

@mommysar thank you for your input and I will definitely keep that in mind

babyrover · August 2015

I have had a few bouts of depression in my past. The second long term bout I was able to self manage and work through it based on what I learned the first time and through a lot of communication. The first time I couldn't recognize what was happening or why, resulting in a very long and more serious bout of depression. I needed a lot more help and did end up on medications for a while. And that's okay. While I now find it easy to talk about with just about anyone (keeping in mind that everyone is different and so are their experiences with depression), the first time was a whole different ball game. When I did have to tell those I cared about, I actually formulated all that I wanted to say in a letter and gave it to them to read while I was in the room. It helped lay all my cards on the table without having to formulate words or lose my train of thought as I knew there would be interruptions. It was my approach and it really did work well for me.
PPD is now a real concern for me, but I've been upfront with my husband and doctor and she has given him things to look out for. Hopefully I won't be triggered but I do realize my chances are higher than most given my history.
I wish you the best of luck, and want you to know that as difficult as it is, it is so important to get the help you need early on to minimize its impact.
Sorry this was so long-winded.

usernameneededallaretaken · August 2015

Oh, please don't shut out the possibility of help. Talk to DH, or simply hand him your phone with this thread open and walk out of the room. Then he has time to process and think through his thoughts/feelings.

Or email someone you can trust.

Therapy or meds, or both. It took both to get me out of my own head, but so many people can be successful with one, the other, or simply talking to a friend or loved one.

SashaDenn25 · August 2015

Just come out and say it to DH, you should feel instant relief for someone who can support you to know. As for not wanting meds, seeking professional help by just talking with someone to sort things out is for sure an option. You dont HAVE to go on meds unless you choose to, but you do need to seek help for your own health in order to be the best for your baby. Remember you have to take care of you too.

ann_jeremiah · August 2015

Not everyone who has depression needs medication... And if a certain medication doesn't work for you... There are plenty of others and dosages to try. Being mentally healthy for you family is what is best.

FWIW... You saying medication is a "mask," is adding stigma to the whole situation.

Miz_Liz · August 2015

I haven't read through all of the responses, just skimmed, but I agree with everyone who said you should be talking to your OB about how you are feeling ASAP. PPD is nothing to be ashamed of, it is very real and very common - if it wasn't, they wouldn't have a name for it and people wouldn't even know what it was or that it could even happen! Your Dr is trained to deal with PPD, but it is extremely important that you are 100% honest with them about how you are feeling so that they can work with you to identify the best treatment plan for you and your individual needs. Please do not feel embarrassed or ashamed, it is normal and it is okay! But please, for your own health do not delay talking to your OB. Good luck mama!

gulimz · August 2015

Definitely talk to your ob. There is no shame in needing help. I have a touch of the baby blues myself, and I seeked for help immediately. In most cases, it's merely your hormones getting all out of wack. But in others, it can lead to some hard core psychosis and such. You do not want that. Don't be ashamed from your husband. There is no shame in having depression or seeking help.

kettlekitten · August 2015

There has been some fantastic advice above. Hopefully you can talk to your DH about it, and perhaps direct him to internet resources on the subject so he can see how common and normal it is to experience these feelings. I don't know for sure but I imagine PPD could manifest in a number of ways and the depression may not appear to be directly related to the baby.

Medication doesn't have to be a long term thing and may just help you through a difficult patch.

I'm also on the lookout for signs of it as I spent about a year with it after my last birth. Fingers crossed I can keep it at bay this time. Good luck to you, hope you can find a way to address it with DH and find some solutions.

dkizz82 · August 2015

Talk to your Docotor. I'm on anti depressants for ppd and I can't sleep. Very odd that it happens like that.

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