Husband being an arse (Long) :(

Sorry if there has been a post about this recently but I'm too upset, tired and emotional to function well - I am barely coping

Let me start by letting you know that my children have been away with their grandparents abroad for a couple of weeks (5 hour time difference). Anyway, so they've got back a week ago and ever since have been cranky, exhausted and plain simple are posing really challenging behaviour. My eldest two who went are 12 and 8 - so old enough to cope with it and young enough to not fully understand how exhausting lack of sleep can be for everyone. Anyway, we also have a toddler who is 14 months and was unfortunately ill whilst the eldest two were away - in a nutshell I haven't slept well in 2-3 weeks straight and I am Exhausted. I am 16+3 pregnant too which isn't helping and my emotions are all over the place.

So long story short - kids playing up big time as explained & to top it off they are still after a week of being home, getting up & mucking about at 2,3,4am or whatever other ungodly hour they choose.

So my issue - I AM EXHAUSTED, here's where my husband is relevant (or not as the case may be). He works 12 hours days most days so he says when he comes home he expects to be done for the day! Dinner in the table, house tidy, kids asleep and done! Home time is his time! (These are all things he's said to me). I understand I really do and I do try (& mostly fail - all except the toddler who is an amazing sleeper) but here's my issues - when does my day end? Sometimes it doesn't, they simple roll into one another, a blur, a mess, a chaotic state of existence, with mess and noise and challenges. Comments like "you are their mum, it's your job deal with it" make me want to punch him & cause serious harm. Tonight he's gone to bed, it's 1am and he's chuffed off to bed, I'm still up with the kids - we've had a full blown argument and he says "it's all you" and f-s off to bed leaving me to deal with it. Having now got the kids in bed (but possible but sleeping yet) I'm now so wound up and upset I can't sleep.

I don't know why I'm writing this and I can't think how anyone can actually help me. I guess I'm just looking for someone who has the same type of selfish husband so I can feel normal and not alone in this. All I'm thinking is I've had enough and if I don't get back to decent sleep & kids in routine again soon I'm divorcing him. He makes me so angry.

Anyone else have and arsehole husband or just me? Or perhaps it is all me - who knows my emotions are everywhere