Can't decide between epidural or natural birth..

cheyforman · July 2015

Okay so one day I'm totally 100% for natural birth, thinking I could use music, walking, and the whirlpool bath to help wth labor pain and not use any pain medication, but then other days I'm thinking about how easy and a better experience it would be with an epidural.. but I'm so afraid of them messing up and I get paralyzed or some other complication.. any advice from second time+ moms?? I'm due in less than two weeks!

DChunt09 · July 2015

I have only had babies with epidurals, so I can't say anything for natural birthing personally.
While all of my pregnancies have been with epidurals, most of my friends have gone completely natural, some even at home.

My experience with the epidural is that once I had it, my body was in a complete state of rest and I dilated so much faster once having it. My babies were both born, roughly, 3 hours after an epidural. It was a great experience for me with no complication.

On the other hand, all of my friends who have gone completely natural, also have wonderful stories and experiences. I will say that they were prepared to go that route from the beginning and had put in a ton of research and practice. They had midwives and doulas to help support their journey. I don't know what your history is with that, so I'm just throwing it out there.

Obviously, either option can turn on you and you wind up having a birth that you may not have planned on. So, you have to be relatively open minded no matter what.

Good luck on deciding! You're so close!

CrystalRaquel2010 · July 2015

Not saying this for sympathy, i just want you to understand where i came from. I lost my first daughter, and still had to go through delivery. I did a birthing tub, and honestly i don't mean to be over dramatic, but i thought i was going to die. My child was not even fully developed and it hurt so bad i told my husband "if i die, just know i love you" because the pain was so intense. I am a baby when it comes to pain though, so take this how you want. I thought because she was so small I wouldn't need anything. Now with this pregnancy, i know i want an epidural. Like everyone else said, go in with an open mind, but i definitely will never do natural again, and would recommend it to anyone who is on the fence about it.

Snoflakes4eva · July 2015

You don't have to decide until you are actually in labor.

I know each hospital has a different policy, but I decided to wait until I couldn't take the pain anymore (9 cm) to have my epidural, it was also the last point that my hospital would let me have it. And its a good thing, because I ended up needing forceps.

acciocoffee · July 2015

It really just depends on how well you are able to relax your body through pain. The more tense you are, the more painful the labor is. If you are able to learn to relax your body during the contractions, then I would say try for a natural birth! There are so many benefits to it and the worst that happens is you give in and get the epidural! However, if you aren't able to relax your muscles at all through the pain, you might want to consider the epidural. Having tense muscles causes more damage to you and to baby during birth. So for some people, I think the epidural is probably the safer option.

cMichelle0423 · July 2015

I got epidurals with both labors and they didn't work for me either time. I'm doing a natural birth this time with my 3rd at a birth center since I see no point in the risk of an epidural that won't work for me.

You can always try for a natural and get an epi if you just can't handle the pain.

Leahauc · July 2015

I agree with everyone else, go in with an open mind. Try natural and if it's too much, get the epidural. I went in planning to get the epi but wanted to experience labor first. I ended up having to be induced with pitocin after my water broke at home, and I was over experiencing labor at 4 cm. The epi was, in my opinion, the greatest thing ever, and I was 10 cm and ready to push 5 hrs later. Just go with the flow and make your decision then.

KateLouise · July 2015

I've only done natural births, so have no personal experience with epidurals, but I know heaps of people who have nothing but good things to say about them.

I think a lot of being able to go through a natural birth is good luck. I think that it's the exhaustion of a really long labour and the unknown of how the labour will unfold that gets to a lot of women. If you KNEW you had ten of the worst contractions to get through, and you had to do that after a reasonably quick build up when you're still fresh and have energy, then anyone could get through that.

If, on the other hand, you've had hours and hours of labour with little sleep, and your body doesn't see to be progressing and there's no way of knowing if/when it will then that's exhausting both physically and mentally.

I've had two relatively short active labours (7 hours and 3 hours) after a steady build up over a day, and during the build up I was able to eat and nap.

I found water invaluable and spent a lot of time in the shower and the tub both at home and in the hospital. I also agree with pp that relaxing through each contraction really helps.

I wouldn't choose anything but a natural birth, but accept that no one can predict labour and tools like epidurals are obviously invaluable, so I do go in with an open mind.

Having said that, there is a school of thought that says if you go into labour with the idea that epidurals are an option then you will eventually cave. I personally disagree, but I do understand this argument.

I do agree with pp that you don't have to decide before labour. If you want to go for a natural birth then research options for pain management, and ensure you have a supportive OB/MW/partner and then whatever happens on the day, happens on the day.

delujm0 · July 2015

Wait to decide until you are in labor. You have no idea whether you can handle the pain of med - free childbirth until you're in it.

In my case, baby was sunny side up so I had 100% back labor. I didn't get the epidural until 6cm (I was begging for it hours before that, long story). The pain was so bad there was no way on earth music or positive thinking was taking it away, and I was doing plenty of walking around which also did not help.

Going into it, I figured I'd wait as long as I could before the epidural and wanted to get to 6cm before getting it so it wouldn't slow things down. While I did wind up waiting for 6cm, that was not my choice once it was actually happening. I wanted it way earlier.

Just go in with an open mind. If you need the epi, get it. If not, try med-free. Either way the birth is "natural' and you'll have a baby afterwards. And don't worry about an epi affecting breastfeeding...that has happened to no one I know, and breastfeeding was successful for me immediately.

Latina211508 · July 2015

Hi I'm pregnant with my fourth baby. I had an epidural with my first and with my other two I had them natural. Honestly the epidural was amazing. Personally it was a quick pinch and I could still feel when to push, I could still feel my legs etc. I had no bad side effects. When I had both my daughters I chose to go natural and honestly it wasn't that bad either. But I also had very easy deliveries. Each of my deliveries were only 2-3 hours. So I wasn't in pain for hours and hours. I think that makes a big difference. Definitely wait until you're in labor only because that's when the real decision comes. Once you start getting contractions you'll know. I also personal didn't listen to music, walk around when I was having contractions. I just held my husbands hand and we talked through them. Support also helps a lot.

blondekates1 · July 2015

Another advocate here for keeping an open mind. With my first, I wanted very much to do a natural birth but was determined not to be a soldier if it got completely unbearable. I labored for 2 hours using my breathing and relaxation techniques and then all of a sudden I was no longer able to overcome the pain of the contractions. At that point, I was ready to ask for the epidural when the nurse checked my cervix, and I was 10 cm and the baby was on his way out! Five minutes later my baby was born!

We are planning on having a big family (pregnant with twins now!), and I would love to be able to do natural every time. I could feel everything that was happening. I knew which position I had to be in for my cervix to open up, and of course I didn't have to worry about any potential side effects from an epidural. However, I'm still going to go into each birth open-minded. If labor isn't progressing, an epidural definitely can help you calm down.

Bigboobsmcgee · July 2015

I didn't get to the hospital in time for the epidural I wanted with my second child because she came too quick. I was not prepared to go med free and I honestly thought I was going to die because it was so painful. With that being said, and time does make you forget how bad it actually was, I preferred doing it med free over the birth I had with an epidural simply because the recovery was so much easier. I could get up right away and felt fabulous despite having pushed a 9 lb baby out without any pain meds. I had more energy and felt better all over.

You won't be able to make a decision now so be prepared to go either way. Good luck.

maiatene · July 2015

Go with an open mind. Babies have a way of changing the best laid birth plans so learn as much as you can about epidurals and c-sections as you can so you aren't surprised if things deviate from your ideal situation.

I wanted to have a med - free birth but my contractions were inconsistent and unproductive so I was induced. I toughed it out for 6 hours before I accepted the epidural. The rest of my labor was uneventful and I pushed out my son a few hours later with no issues.

Any decision you make is what's best for you so best of luck! The goal is a healthy baby, not a perfect story

kderham · July 2015

I had an epidural and regret it so much. It slowed labor down dramatically - as it is scientifically known to do. Its not that I minded that aspect really but I ended up having a c-section because (I know this sounds ridiculous but its true) the doctor was tired of waiting. I loved the jacuzzi tub but I forgot to empty and add new warm water so its effect was short lived. Everyone is different. There are also other pain medications. Some hospitals even offer laughing gas just to take the edge off. You will do what feels right to you. From my experience, what you felt strongly about before, no matter which side you were on, can go out the window when things get serious. Get your baby out in whatever way you decide is right for you when its occuring. The birth story is just one day (or hopefully just a few hours) but its your beautiful baby's health that really matters in the end. Good luck!

EricaOO · July 2015

I was induced and had an epidural. Once I got the epidural, I felt no pain at all, dilated quickly, and pushed for 40min which is on the short side. No side effects after it wore off. I plan to have an epidural with baby #2 as well.

jdsummerbaby · July 2015

I know some people started off with wanting a natural birth and changed there mind when they were actually in labor.

kayway85 · July 2015

I had a natural birth, 21 hours, and I'm not going to lie to you, it's challenging and painful. But there are ways to manage the pain. It's also an incredibly powerful experience. After I have birth I felt like I could literally do anything, my body was so pumped with endorphins. I wouldn't change my experience. I felt like I wanted to experience child birth in all it's gory, beautiful, glory and I did it. That being said, if that's not important to you and you're not 100% committed to it, just get the epidural. I have 8 friends who have birth around the same time I did and none if them -zero- gave birth naturally in a hospital with an OB. I was the only one and I think that was because 1. I had a kick ass midwife who supported my decision and was present for most of my labor. 2. I had the full support of my husband 3. I took classes and read a TON of books on hypnobirthing. If you're on the fence about it, the chances of you doing it naturally is very small. Because it is the most difficult thing I have ever done and if I wasn't prepared and 100% committed, I wouldn't have done it either.

cubberss · July 2015

I've done it both ways and much preferred my med-free births. I'm planning med-free again this time.

spank705 · August 2015

My first son I gave birth to was an all natural vaginal birth without any intervention. I can not tell you how incredibly proud I was of myself after giving birth naturally. It changed me and made me a more confident first time mom. I wouldn't change anything. I started having discharge and lost plug in the early morning. Then was slowly leaking until 4 pm when I started felling contraction's. They quickly grew in intensity. Then my water broke. I went to the hospital because it was becoming more painful I couldn't stand. When I arrived at 8:30 pm I was 5cm dilated. I labored in a normal bath tub for one hour. They checked my cervix and I was 10cm. At that point I felt like pushing and 15 minutes later my son was born. I barely tore. The midwife helped rub numbing cream around the vagina so it didn't burn as much when pushing. After his head was out they asked me to reach down and pull him out. Gently picking him up by his armpits. He was very alert and started latching to nurse in less than an hour after being born. You should try natural. It is best for baby. You can always change your mind though but not too far along. The pain is indescribable. Do not underestimate that but once its over it is so worth it. Good luck!

mollypuss1 · August 2015

spank705 said:
You should try natural. It is best for baby.

Sorry but statements like this really bother me. You should do whatever you feel is best for you and your baby whether that be medicated or not. Natural is not best for baby if it's not the best choice for you.

Can't decide between epidural or natural birth..

Re: Can't decide between epidural or natural birth..

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