New/STMs-- How does it feel??

louiseambrose · July 2015

(Not that it matters, but) this pregnancy was 100% planned, DH and I are in a good place and as prepared as anybody can be, etc. I still have 4 weeks to EDD. But I alternate between being ambivalent and just terrified of this being-a-mom thing. Like, some days/hours my primary thought is, "do I have to?" just because it is Such A Big Deal!! When I hear people say "it changes everything," I worry because I really like my (boring, peaceful) life right now! Can anybody relate? Even better, already-mommas, can you try to put into words what makes it all worth it and so awesome??

emmacake08 · July 2015

I personally got such a euphoric high off my a** high after LOs were born I remember saying I wanted 20 more kids (dead serious in the moment). Up until giving birth, nothing has compared to that feeling. I am even preemptively getting sad that this will most likely be my last "high". All the pre baby worry was so cerebral and in that pre baby moment and head space. One they were here it was just a different plane of exisistence. I don't necessarily mean that that new plane is one where you're happy all the time but it is just different to the one you were on pre baby. I still have bad days and feel like I'm at my limit, but there is always an underlying joy and contentment I haven't had before motherhood.

Also, it's okay if it takes some time to bond with LO and your new life. I bonded pretty easily but there were still moments where we were all still getting to know each other and bond. It will come. The fact that you're worried makes me not worried about you!

CaliforniaDream87 · July 2015

It's really indescribable. Even on hard days like today (horrible temper tantrums/grouchy/telling me *no* all day) it's still so worth it. It's the hardest thing I've ever done but when my son smiles at me-OMG I realize I was born for this. You will understand soon OP

breezymeema7 · July 2015

I can't put it any better then what @emmacake08 and @CaliforniaDream87 have said.

thesportsgal · July 2015

breezymeema7 said:
I can't put it any better then what @emmacake08 and @CaliforniaDream87 have said.

Same. My daughter squeezed my head the other day and planted a kiss on my mouth. It was pure heaven.

And we are boring people too. Some days we get to be that and other days are crazy

. You'll get there!

gremarie21 · July 2015

I can't imagine my world without my DS.

benmel31 · July 2015

There are times when DH and I just look at one another over our daughter's head and grin at one another. It is just unbelievable how this little person can make your heart feel so big. But things are not always wonderful and that is ok. Having kids is fun, entertaining, satisfying, frustrating, inconvenient, tough...I could go on and on. But it is so worth it!

saroos3137 · July 2015

I really enjoyed our simple, "boring" life before DS. I enjoyed my peaceful sleep and hanging out on the couch all evening. But I wouldn't trade being a mom for anything in the world, even on the hardest days. DS has been a real peach lately with tons of temper tantrums and not listening, yet seconds later when he's smiling and giggling or wrapping his arms around us, DH and I just melt and can't believe were so lucky to get to be his parents. It's such an amazing feeling.

MissusTexas · July 2015

I remember being terrified at times when I was pregnant with my first, but it's like with any life event- you adapt and you can handle it! It is the most rewarding thing in the word and it's true that the love you feel for your child is more powerful than anything you've ever known before.

The main thing keeping me from freaking out about going through labor again and having TWO littles is that I KNOW exactly how worth it it all is- like guaranteed happiness is waiting for me as soon as she's born.

kettlekitten · July 2015

PPs have said some lovely words above but please don't feel bad or 'wrong' if you don't feel all those feelings straight away. The first year of my DDs life was tough going, and it's not all happy jolly fun times now, but there are so many moments where she makes us crack up laughing, where we could burst with pride, or our hearts melt with how sweet she is being. I'm definitely much more a fan of the walking talking toddler stage (frustrating as it can be) than the baby stage.

It is completely normal to feel terrified about how your life will change. I definitely like the quiet life and struggle sometimes when I need those quiet moments and can't have them. But I wouldn't be without that crazy loveable kid!

Perfect Sonnet · July 2015

I have quite a few people in my life who don't want to have kids because they can't imagine all of the work and the lifestyle change involved with it. They see all the things we deal with, and we are used to at this point, and can't imagine doing it. It is really hard and took my husband and I a long time to get used to life with a child (especially spending our 20s doing whatever we wanted). But when you look at this little one and see how much joy they bring to your life, you realize how empty it would be without all of the work that people are so terrified of.

cbernard10 · July 2015

I agree with what everyone else has said 100%!
Looking back on my pre-baby days, I honestly don't know what I did with all my time! After I put DS to bed at night, I'm bored!

saraheve23 · July 2015

All of the PPs have said it well, I just want to add, though there is a part of you that will change (you will soon be someone's mother!), I'd say that most of who you are stays the same. Also, there are so many things you can do with a baby/kid! Other than going to the movies or bars or out at night, our lifestyle is very similar to how it was before.

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