Feeling so sad and low not enjoying this at all

Re: Feeling so sad and low not enjoying this at all

• tmo51324 member

  July 2015

  You're not a bad person. Pregnancy is a very strange, hormonal, emotional time. We're all told how we're "supposed" to feel and a lot if pressure is put on us to feel wonderful and amazing about being pregnant! I think you need to talk to someone qualified and let those people who love you care for you. Sending love xxx

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• hailees member

  July 2015

  I am so sorry you are feeling this way. I just wanted to encourage you with what came to mind when I was reading this. Pregnancy isn't glamorous like movies make it out to be (I have puked while simultaneously peeing my pants more times than I wish to count!), but we were made for this. Our bodies are doing something truly miraculous right now. You are not ugly. You are beautiful. You are strong. And most of all, you can do this. Whatever form of help you seek or need, I hope you find peace. From one internet stranger to another, prayers and blessings heading your way!

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• Krisdee123 member

  July 2015

  Another internet stranger weighing in. Please call your doctor and ask for help. I know it's really hard, but you will feel so much better talking to a qualified person. You deserve to feel positive about this experience and all it has to offer. Be well. Xo

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• lmorre11 member

  July 2015

  Thank you for all of your advice, I will be speaking to my Dr.. I think ive just been hoping I will get through it on my own, failing miserably so far though.

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• Merroneymaria member

  July 2015 edited July 2015

  I just wanted to add my support, say you are not alone and to offer you this one great piece of advice that carries through lots of life's challenging situation (and I think pregnancy can be considered a challenge in many ways): everything is temporary. Your pregnancy is already well over half way and you will have more ownership of your beautiful body in a few short weeks. It isn't going to last forever and with the right support and guidance your lowness will pass too. Just try and hold that in mind as you continue doing the excellent job you are doing growing your baby. You've come this far, the last step is going to be better.

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• lmorre11 member

  July 2015

  Thank you.. I hadn't thought about it like that, sometimes hard to see the positive at the end because of all the negative invading in my head, I really can't wait to have my baby I just feel I need to make that clear, I wanted this more than anything in the world. Im not the sort of person who deals well when I'm not in control which unfortunately makes up more than half of our life's situations. All these kind words from you lovely people really helps a lot x

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• alanna3622 member

  July 2015

  I think you should give the therapy a try.... I am assuming that the person you told you a few years ago that you had BDD was a professional.
  
  If you have a good therapist, therapy is not about just sitting on a couch talking about your mother. It is about disentangling your more toxic thought patterns and training/empowering you to redirect your thoughts into ones that are rational and grounded. Now is a wonderful time for you to focus on yourself and make sure you are ready to create a safe and nurturing environment for baby. That includes making sure that mama is healthy and strong! I am concerned that if you wait until after baby arrives, you will be too tired and overwhelmed with a newborn to take care of yourself.
  
  Good luck and hope all goes well with the second half of your pregnancy.

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• lmorre11 member

  July 2015

  It was a professional yes, but the therapy I've had wasn't till after my ectopic and it funnily enough was sat on a couch talking about family I didn't gain much from it at all I think I felt better because of the medication.. Im just so torn between starting it back up again for the babies health however im not naive enough to think that my feeling like this is any good for me or my little one either.. I have an appointment to see the dr so will discuss which avenue is best to go down with them.

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• tobrieornottobrie member

  July 2015

  I'm really sorry that you're feeling this way. I definitely think that therapy/counseling could be helpful, as others have mentioned. Also, what are you doing for yourself right now? I would guess that you're probably focusing in on getting things ready for when the baby arrives but it's important that you also take care of yourself. Know that you aren't alone and hang in there! Blessings! 

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• contourhands member

  July 2015

  Hi... My sister struggles with bdd so I know how hard it is to cope with.. Hope you are okay feel better soon!! Pregnancy isn't that fun for me either... With my 1sf I took. All of the bodily changed really hard but this time around I try to just keep busy and remember it's all temp..,I don't particularly like looking in the mirror rt now either but then again your body bounces back once the baby is here and our spouses/mates love us for more than our looks... Try and surrender because millions of women rt now feel pretty uncomfortable along with you

  <a href="http://s369.photobucket.com/albums/oo139/jessieohartz/?action=view

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• alanna3622 member

  July 2015

  lmorre11 said:

  It was a professional yes, but the therapy I've had wasn't till after my ectopic and it funnily enough was sat on a couch talking about family I didn't gain much from it at all I think I felt better because of the medication.. Im just so torn between starting it back up again for the babies health however im not naive enough to think that my feeling like this is any good for me or my little one either.. I have an appointment to see the dr so will discuss which avenue is best to go down with them.

  Ugh. Sorry that your earlier therapy experience was not a very good one. I don't know much about BDD so feel free to ignore this as irrelevant. I am a big believer in Cognitive Behavioural Therapy for what I suffer from, which is anxiety. I was literally paralyzed by illogical and painful thought patterns, and my therapist was a lifesaver. He would never encourage perseveration / rumination / obsessive thinking (ie the couch scenario dwelling on childhood sins). CBT all the way.
  
  Super glad you are going to discuss with your doctor. And good for you for not giving up on yourself.
  
  Isn't it funny that we can be 10,000x harder on ourselves than we would ever be to a stranger or even someone we disliked?
  
  Please keep us posted on how you are doing.

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• lmorre11 member

  July 2015

  contourhands said:

  Hi... My sister struggles with bdd so I know how hard it is to cope with.. Hope you are okay feel better soon!!
  Pregnancy isn't that fun for me either... With my 1sf I took. All of the bodily changed really hard but this time around I try to just keep busy and remember it's all temp..,I don't particularly like looking in the mirror rt now either but then again your body bounces back once the baby is here and our spouses/mates love us for more than our looks...
  Try and surrender because millions of women rt now feel pretty uncomfortable along with you

  Hi, I'm hoping I'll be able to accept the changes are temporary, I honestly thought I would deal a lot better with this than I have.. I've never had the right therapy though so hopefully that will make a difference. I tried yesterday to just smile and get on with things even though I didn't feel like I wanted too so when I started to have a bad thought about myself I just told myself it's fine don't be so hard on yourself.. Easier said than done though! Im actually exhausted by the constant obsessing now, I really hope my dr can help. Feeling hopeful and positive after hearing people's kind words and support

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• lmorre11 member

  July 2015

  contourhands said:

  Hi... My sister struggles with bdd so I know how hard it is to cope with.. Hope you are okay feel better soon!!
  Pregnancy isn't that fun for me either... With my 1sf I took. All of the bodily changed really hard but this time around I try to just keep busy and remember it's all temp..,I don't particularly like looking in the mirror rt now either but then again your body bounces back once the baby is here and our spouses/mates love us for more than our looks...
  Try and surrender because millions of women rt now feel pretty uncomfortable along with you

  Can I ask what your sister did for help? And how she's doing

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• katrinasmith17 member

  July 2015

  Thinking of you . I hope you feel better.

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• rebeccashaffer member

  July 2015

  I understand how you feel. I recently moved in March from Vegas to Florida for my husband's job & left behind my career to do so. I found out a month later I was preggo (planned) but its lonely with all my friends & family north or back west. I started helping with local charities to make friends & help feel better. As far as the "body image" goes...I hear you loud and clear. I was 108lbs when I got preggo and 8 weeks out from a fitness competition, now my muscle has faded and I'm 130lbs. Yikes. It is a different kind of beauty, but I found following others on Instagram who are preggo and embracing it with beauty helps to motivate me as I stare at my....not going to fit for 12 months side of the closet...lol. It's normal to feel how you do, I just can't wait to hold my little one because that makes it all worth it!!! You are not alone

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• ldowd21016 member

  July 2015

  You are not alone. I am dealing with a lot of anxiety with this pregnancy. I am just so tired all day and it not easy keeping up with my 6 and 3 year old. Im snapping at everyone. I am just plain miserable.

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