Just a rant. Short and sweet

Flyingtrouble · July 2015

My MIL is the stupidest person I've ever met. She is selfish and manipulative and I have put up with it for years but I've got to the point where I just don't know what to say sometimes. I'm a size 14 and yesterday she presented me with a present she bought me.. A size 20 dress. Not only this but she last week decided she didn't like her job any more and just.. Walked out! Nothing else to go to. She endlessly complains about not having any money and during my last pregnancy DH and I decided we would buy her house from her to make sure she and his much younger sis would always have a roof over their heads no matter what.
This now means that I cannot give up work thanks to the added financial obligation, but she just waltzes out of hers because she doesn't "feel like it" . I'm beyond angry and insulted and I just wanted a rant.
Sorry, didn't actually end up that short or sweet!!

vvitchhazel · July 2015

Wow! What a lack of appreciation for what you and your husband have done for her! I'm so sorry you're dealing with this! Was she financially contributing at all, by paying rent or anything? I'd give her an ultimatum--You have this long to find another job or else. Especially knowing that you have a LO on the way. It's so insensitive!

mamaksweez · July 2015

Agreed! Your MIL is totally insensitive ! Also, the dress, wth?!? I would've been so so pissed!!

Snoopylovesbelle · July 2015

That sucks. I would be so angry.

sck601 · July 2015

What a peach. I'm sorry you have to deal with this. It was very insensitive of her

claireloSC · July 2015

OMG wait do we have the same MIL? Lol. Actually yours sounds worse! Sorry you're dealing with that. Mine also loves to give me XL outfits and even told me my wedding dress made me look fat. I was so upset I got another one and wore it instead. (First was only $300 but I still have never worn it). She also quits jobs on whims or won't even apply! Drives me crazy. She's currently living on an inheritance from her mom even though we tried to get her to invest it. And of course she's not really working and even moved into a more expensive apartment! Sigh. Good luck!

Flyingtrouble · July 2015

I've just had enough. She is causing arguments between DH and I and I feel like I've done everything to try and get on with her and help her and I'm just plain DONE.
I've come home to the UK for a break as I have been really quite ill this pregnancy and so I just wanted my parents to help me out with my LO for a bit.. I landed and 3 hours later had a text from her saying "when I'm I going to see my granddaughter?!" FFS?!?! Just give me a few days to settle in and rest a bit why don't you!!

Flyingtrouble · July 2015

laurenmichaels · July 2015

Sucks! Hugs to you.

steph_pegasus · July 2015

I'm sorry, annoying MILs are a pill.
You should take the dress back to her and say, "oops, looks like one of yours ended up in this bag, that's way too big for me."

Just ignore her until you're ready to deal with it. I hope you have fun visiting your fam!!

DaphneMoon1 · July 2015

I love MIL stories!

Sorry yours is being such a b.

@claireloSC I can't believe your said you looked fat in your wedding dress! Wtf?! That's ridiculous!

claireloSC · July 2015

Yeah I needed her to alter the straps for me and when she was measuring me she said that. I'm not plus size either and was pretty much at a good weight for my height at my wedding. When I got the new dress I had a professional seamstress tailor it. It cost more but at least I felt pretty on my wedding day!

ETA: @DaphneMoon

Flyingtrouble · July 2015

That's just plain rude @claireloSC
Hope you felt good on your wedding day itself. Have you thought of changing the colour of the other and wearing it as a normal dress? I'm going to do that with mine

claireloSC · July 2015

@Flyingtrouble

This is the dress so I don't know if it's possible to dye it!

ccoleeman · July 2015

@claireloSC that dress is such a unique style and so pretty, it would look amazing in another color! I've never seen a dress like it before; you deserve to make it your own and rock it

Eta: these MILS unfortunately sound a lot like my mom. I have the fortune of living 500 miles away from her but I totally understand your frustration. I agree with @vvitchhazel that an ultimatum is best. You need to enforce her financial commitment or ask her to leave. It's so important to lay that groundwork now because it'll only get worse as she gets older, next thing you know she's too old/sick/disabled and CAN'T return to work, and then your bills will really pile up. It's not easy but get her back in the workforce before it's too late (and make sure she has all her insurances-we are in the process of doing that with my mom, we refuse to have our family hurt financially just because she can't hold down a job and wasted her inheritance)

Flyingtrouble · July 2015

Wow @claireloSC that is STUNNING! I think that would look lovely in a deep blue, depending on your skin tone. I'll dig out a picture of my dress in a sec..

The problem with ultimatums is while I'm all for it.. DH is still a mummy's boy. Yes this whole thing is frustrating him and he's incredibly angry but he just WONT say anything to his mum. This is what's causing the huge arguments between us. If I say anything to MIL myself I get told it's none of my business!! Ergh!

vvitchhazel · July 2015

And I'd retort that I'm housing you, so it IS my business! When you start paying your own bills, you'll get treated like an adult, GRANDMA! Ugh! I'm SO frustrated for you!

Flyingtrouble · July 2015

Glad no one thinks I'm over reacting.
I just thought by sorting the house for her it would stop her complaining endlessly and hitting us up for money the whole time but it seems not

.

On a more interesting theme.. Here are my two wedding dresses (2 weddings, a year apart, same groom.. Long story!!)
The plainer one I'm going to dye but have no idea what to do with the other. Sell it or use it to make christening gowns?! What do you think?
(And no, unfortunately that's not me in the second dress

)

LauraFi · July 2015

I don't think you are overreacting at all. Family and money rarely mix well there tends to be a sense of entitlement. If there is a spare room maybe you could rent it out to help cover the bills, or give her the ultimatum that she will need to get a room mate to cover bills if she is t able to cover them herself. Just an idea. P.S. Love the dresses! I still have my wedding dress and no idea what to do with it.

claireloSC · July 2015

ccoleeman had the best advice. (And thanks re: my original dress!) Also, your dresses are lovely! They are actually similar to the dress I ended up wearing to my wedding (but mine had added straps and didn't have the brown band):

@LauraFi I know, mine are in a box. We were thinking of saving it in case we have a daughter and she wanted to use it in some way for her wedding? I like the christening gown idea too, although we aren't going to be christening our child. I'm a sewer so I've also thought of making it into something else, but I can't bring myself to cut it up.

ariasbabyblog · July 2015

Totally off MIL topic, but I had my wedding dress professionally cleaned and boxes (I think most dry cleaners will do it), but I really don't know what I'm going to do with it. It is currently sitting at my parents' house with my mom's wedding dress (also cleaned and boxed). I really don't know if I could bring myself to cut it up. I LOVE that dress. Maybe I can wiggle into it for my 10 year anniversary? 20 year? No idea.

Want a personalized experience?

Just a rant. Short and sweet

Re: Just a rant. Short and sweet

Choose Another Board

Search Boards