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March 2016 Moms
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Jealousy and hormones :-(

kcde3314kcde3314 member
in March 2016 Moms
Ok, so I'm a lesbian and been with my girlfriend for a year and a half. We did artificial insemination at home. I'm now 5 wks and 2 days pregnant and feeling VERY sensitive and hormonal, and I'm fully aware of that. However, I've always had some jealousy and insecurity issues when it comes to my gf. She has a very low sex drive and has a hard time showing affection. This gets to me sometimes and hurts my feelings and makes me wonder if she's even attracted to me. She's says its her and not me. But its hard. She met a new friend at work at her new job, who is also a female. This friend is married and has a baby.. But it seems sometimes like they're just too close for comfort. Her friend leaves messages on her wall on Facebook, they text, etc. I understand that yes, us lesbians can have female friends.. But I feel at times like saying .."back off, this is MY woman.." And like her friend is just a little too important and too close and I don't like it one bit. It just makes me uncomfortable, especially since this friend is definitely her "type" and if my gf was single and her friend was into women, they'd probably date. Am I being unreasonable, needy and insecure? Or can anyone else in the lesbian community relate with me? Any advice would be greatly appreciated, thanks!
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Re: Jealousy and hormones :-(

  • 2-Step2-Step member
    I'm not a lesbian, but I have always had a lot of male friends while dating and being married to my husband. Does she include you with her socializing with this friend? If not, ask to be included and then get to know the friend as well as you can. Maybe you will both find a person that can become a great source of friendship and support as you start your life with a new baby. I've had very close "brother" type relationships with many male friends over the years, that never led to anything more, so I know it is possible to find things outside of your marriage that are fulfilling and non-sexual. I think the red flags would be if your partner doesn't want you to be included in the relationship or become friends with this person as well, if hides her communications with this person or beings to ditch out on things you have planned to be with her friend. Other than that I think you need to just be supportive and try to get to know her so you can make a real judgement on where everything stands. If it really bothers then tell your partner honestly.  
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