Husband eavesdropping

Chris189 · July 2015

My husband and I are visiting his parents who live about 5 hours away from the city. We arrived today. Tonight after we had a family dinner and his other family left about 9pm I went in our room and got changed into my PJ's finally after a big day and phoned my mum to let her know how I am, that I got here safely etc. My husband came in and sat on the bed while I was talking/listening to me (he was with his family occupied) I then said I'll call my mum back in a minute and I went to the toilet, came back and asked him if he is ok, if he needs anything he just no I'm fine and sat there playing on his phone. He went out left the door open (when I had it shut for privacy because his mum will talk to me while I'm on the phone/everyone can hear me) so I shut it and he came back and opened it and was standing there again looking at me while I was on the phone. Then when I asked him if he is ok/what's he doing he got moody at me and went back out to the lounge room where his mum/dad are and a couple minutes later he returns this time I'm on the phone again to my mum talking and he starts looking for his sandals (making noise, asking me where it is etc while I'm on the phone trying to have a conversation) I told my mum to hang on as I was trying to help him find it but it became distressing because I couldn't find it and he wanted them and I had my mum on hold for a few minutes. I basically told him to go out and I'll find them and bring them to him which I did. I know this nothing important I was just wondering if it is a sign of him trying to listen in my phone calls? Earlier today when I was on the phone to my sister he wanted to know why I was on the phone/what she wanted. I'm not trying to make something out of nothing just find it abit rude

rdilts · July 2015

Hmmmm, I will occasionally ask my hubby who he was talking to if I hear him making plans but not really trying to ease drop. It is usually if I am in the room and he answers a call and talks. But, he can have privacy if he needs it and can go in another room and it doesn't bother me. Same thing with me, he has never interrupted me on the phone like your situation, or tried to keep the door open, sit there and try to listen etc. It is rude for him to do. Maybe he is concerned about something, or maybe he wanted you to come back out to sit with his parents. Not really sure what to make of it.

jmomof4 · July 2015

id just ask him what his deal was.. Lol

celainev · July 2015

Maybe talk to your husband about it? This seems like an odd place to vent about this situation....

kaitinperth · July 2015

To be honest, if we were visiting my family and it was the first night that we were there I would probably get upset if my husband left everyone to talk on his phone to his family. Maybe it was something as simple as that? I don't know your situation at all, just trying to give another point of view. Probably the easiest way to find out is to ask him directly.

josiesanderson · July 2015

He honestly really loves you and either is feeling slightly insecure you have a secret phone lover,
Or is wondering what mama is sayin based on something she maybe said to him earlier that he didn't understand or wants to know? You never know, but if I tell mine he can't do something it gives him 10x the determination to do it

crisobrewha · July 2015

OP, I'm totally projecting, but I think that he's upset you are on the phone with your family while you are physically with his family and visiting them. Maybe make it a point to speak with your family briefly or not at all during these visits with his family. I think he is rude for interrupting, but I also think you're being rude if you are excessively on the phone during a visit. That is the way I was raised. I tell my family when we visit DH's family, so they know not to call unless its an emergency. DH does the same. For us, we don't get to see our families a lot, so it's just a matter of respecting your hosts and giving them the proper attention when you are there with them.

CanDGrrl · July 2015

Some great advice here! Talk to him and ask him if anything is bothering him. I've found that assuming anything about my DH never helps me! Men and women think so differently, it rarely works to try to guess. Spending so much time on the phone could be this issue here, or it could be a total coincidence?? There's only one way to find out!

groovylocks · July 2015

He is probably feeling really left out. Men sometimes do feel abstracted or left out of all of this.

He wants to be as involved as you are and is starting to act neurotic because he's not. He's now feeling like his family is also being left out more than your family.

That's just my guess. Not saying he's right. But just that's how he might be feeling. Is he normally like this or is this weird for him?

jessejasonbaby · July 2015

Im with the PP's on this and think that he is probably annoyed that you spent time talking to your mom while you were physically there with his family. Reverse the scenario to put yourself in his shoes. I know i would be annoyed if my SO went to another room alone to be on the phone while we were visiting my family.

taysun · July 2015

Yes I also agree, I think you were being rude, even if it was unintentionally, and he was probably trying to let you know. I'd ask about it, probably starting off by offering an apology.

Want a personalized experience?

Husband eavesdropping

Re: Husband eavesdropping

Choose Another Board

Search Boards