I love my mother... — The Bump
July 2015 Moms

I love my mother...

but she is driving me insane!!!!
She insists that she's taking my baby at 3 months old to get her ears pierced. She just gave my 3 week old water. When my other two were 3 months old she gave them cookies and milk. And then gets mad at me when I tell her not to do this stuff. Flipped out when I said babies aren't supposed to have water. I do love her.. But omg. Typical gma stuff I guess

Re: I love my mother...

  • That is not cool!  She needs to respect you when you tell her to stop.  Tell her that you want to be the one to take her to get her ears pierced and you want it to be a mommy daughter moment.  Tell her when she can find a doctor that supports her decision to give your new one water than MAYBE you will listen to her.

  • Well she got all butt hurt and said "before internet we actually listened to our mothers on how to raise our kids" I just rolled my eyes. As I do go to her for advice all the time. But back then, they also thought smoking and taking ibuprofen was safe as well. Nor did they put kids in car seats. So excuse me if I don't do things the way they used to be done.
    It's frustrating.. I do love her. She's my rock, always there for me.. Willing to do anything to help me and my kids. So it's like I don't want to offend her in any way.. But, don't get mad at me when I say something has been found unsafe
  • Actually, a little bit of water can help with constipation and digestion problems :) just a little bit though haha like 1 ML or so.
  • This sounds like my dad with my dog. Every time he leaves the house I get to deal with puppy diarrhea. Can't wait to see what he'll try to feed the baby at 3 months. : /
    It's easy to ignore outdated advice, but it's a whole other problem when she's doing all this without asking you, the mom, first. Are you even planning on getting your LO's ears pierced?
  • One of my biggest issues with my Mom is her not respecting our decisions for our kids. I respect her experience as a mom, but ultimately it is up to us what is done. I have seriously threatened her that she will not be left alone with our children if doesn't follow our rules. She knows I'm not bluffing. Especially with safety/health concerns, it is just unexceptable.
    BFP 10/31/12, MC 11/9/12 - We had to say goodbye before we could really say hello. Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I mean, she actually gets mad at me over health concerns.. My baby has had diarrhea for a week. Her nutritionist suggested a gentle formula, so I went and bought some.. My mom acted all annoyed that I changed her formula.. Because it says it helps with crying, gas and fussiness and she's not fussy and barely cries... Just cause that's what it says doesn't mean that's all it's good for. And why am I getting put down for it??
    And her pediatrician said to just watch her for a fever... My mom told me I'm overly paranoid and that it's the internet a fault because I read to much... So I'm a bad mother because I'm watching MY child for a fever because she's had the runs for a week and her damn doctor told me to!!! I swear.. She has done this crap to me since day one with my oldest.. Everything I do is wrong. I just don't even know what to say anymore..
  • I would have flipped.
    Bobby Llewellyn born September 29, 2012
    Kade Wayne born July 23, 2015
    MC in February 2017
    MC in November 2017
    Oliver Dean (Ollie) due December 17, 2018

    BabyFruit Ticker
    Tenth Anniversary 100 Love Its 100 Comments First Answer
    edited July 2015
    I know is makes it harder because it is your mom, but you have to put it to a stop for your own sanity. Tell her you want no unsolicited comments or advice or you will politely ask her to leave. You are not feeling supported by her and that is what you need most, especially with a newborn. I can completely empathize with you. Yesterday I told my mom she is not allowed to discuss breastfeeding with me because she is so negative about it and was making me feel like a failure.
    BFP 10/31/12, MC 11/9/12 - We had to say goodbye before we could really say hello. Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • That's sad:( my mother is very supportive of everything I do.. Except feeding. She gets offended because I won't take her advice on food and juice/water.. But when I tried to breast feed she was 100% supportive and helpful, and when it wasn't working, she was 100% supportive of me formula feeding. I couldn't have handled it if she wasn't. And she's supportive of me going back to school and everything. But when it comes to health, I am a bit over protective where she's so not, so we butt heads on that. And the food thing.. I guess it's old school. So I mean if that's the only things that we clash on, I'm super happy. I'm beyond greatful to have her. And now that we talked about the water thing, she won't do it. And she knows I'm overly paranoid on health and that if I feel something's wrong I'm going to do what I feel is best, even if I'm wrong. So no point in making me feel crazy.
    So it's just normal things. I just needed to vent. I can deal with the little bit over bearing advice. Because I do need her advice in some things. But I had to vent about it or else it was going to eat at me.
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