Sex problems

mommaSimpkin · July 2015

So.. I want it like. Every day. I don't want it all day, every day, ten times a day.
I just want the passionate, one on one time once a day. I wanna be able to have that one thing with DH.
Problem area is, he doesn't want it. Since we got prego. No more sex for us. I gotta beg him. I have to have a reason, and if I don't it's automatically "oh, your sex drive is back. Your in the second trimester".

It makes me so mad. Like all I want it alone time with my husband, and I have to have a reason.

at first it was "I'm afraid of hurting the baby". Now there's no excuse. I'm the one who has to have one.

Like. A naked woman, with engorged boobs just crawled ontop of you and you say "no babe. Not now babe. Why do you want it right now?".

Am I alone here? Anyone else's husbands being a pain in the bedroom?
Rant away.. Please.

JAGClark · July 2015

PREACH. I've had absolute meltdowns over how this makes me feel. I feel unwanted, ugly etc. It's really an awful feeling. And, unfortunately, hubs just doesn't get it and doesn't want it!

cyanope · July 2015

Ha. I'm having the opposite problem. DH wants it, I don't. The only time I feel up for sex is during the afternoon, but the H is at work so... I'm still trying to be a good wife, but it's so hard!! Can't we just eat some skittles and watch Netflix together?? That's intimacy, right??

gerd1986 · July 2015

Same page! A movie, laying in bed and something to eat and im totally happy. Sex is way different now. Not very comfortable for me and i end up doing all the work bc otherwise i feel smashed. I also have to pee non stop and sex makes it worse too. Trying to still be enthusiastic though!

shaunahf · July 2015

My problem is DH wants sex at night (I feel sick more at night) I want sex first thing in the morning. So pretty much were not having sex. Ugh

kgordon756 · July 2015

Is it just me or I'm am I the only one with this clear discharge all the time..that alone kills my sex drive, I want to sometimes but I feel gross all the time..ugh

Meg2016 · July 2015

Lmao that's what I'm saying!!! @cyanope

Kelley421 · July 2015

No sex for so long due to SCH and then hyperemesis. Finally had a good night and after 8 weeks I'm like a freaking virgin again and can't enjoy crap. I'm expecting a cerclage and pelvic rest, so sex...ummm February? Argh.

fragglemom · July 2015

My DH is terrified. My first preganancy ended in miscarriage so he's always on edge that we'll lose this one too. That means no nookie for me. He'll probably come around in the third trimester when I'll be so big I won't want him to touch me.

Buehler99 · July 2015

We were on pelvic rest, then moved in with my parents while our house is being built. I want it all the time, but DH feels weird about having sex in my parents' house. They left for a week, and I had to make the first move, and it only happened twice. When we move in to our place, I may be 7 months pregnant, but he owes me BIG time!!!

ChrissyD1203 · July 2015

@mommaSimpkin that sucks. We have went through dry spurts too (unrelated to pregnancy) and although I'm generally confident that really does do a number on my self image. I just try to think he's in his 30s and doesn't have teenage boy sex drive anymore and I'm sure has lowered libido due to all the stressful things in life that affect all of us. Hang in there.

mollyj931 · July 2015

Skittles and Netflix for me. I try to help him out in other ways....

We have the most sex when I'm 9 months and want to baby out (though it's yet to work with the previous 2!)

Would hearing your dr. tell him it's totally safe help??

TVL25 · July 2015

I'm the opposite! I was on pelvic rest for a SCH as well. My husband was at the appointment when the doctor said to hold off until 2nd tri for sex and he literally text (and said) multiple times a day 8 days... 7 days... Etc. I'm just not feeling it! I've been the most "sick with this pregnancy (without) actually vomiting and still at 13 weeks, I just want to be left alone! I'm sure it will pass for your husband, no worries!

steph_pegasus · July 2015

Morning is the only time I ever want sex anymore, and luckily we are early risers. Too bad DD now wakes up early too, she's interrupted a few morning sex sessions.

It doesn't happen very often though because my libido still isn't back from its 1st tri vacation.
Edit gah spelling!

vvitchhazel · July 2015

Our only dry spells happen when I fall asleep too early, otherwise our sex life hasn't changed. We typically have sex once a day. Usually when we go to bed, sometimes in the morning. He works ten hours a day, but on his days off, we might even get busy in the middle of the day. I don't think anything would ever put him off of sex. TMI, but I've been struggling with providing him with oral because my gag reflex sucks these days.

l4rk · July 2015

@vvitchhazel, please don't ever tell my SO any of that. You're making some of us look bad...

vvitchhazel · July 2015

:O sorry guys!

mamaksweez · July 2015

I'm with you OP!!

cjd&k · July 2015

I feel like the worst fiance ever because I never want to do it. Sometimes I'm in the mood and want too, but then my stomach will start hurting or something dumb and then I don't want too. It's so annoying. I try to have sex, but I feel like I'm half assing it and he totally deserves more. I hope this goes away soon!

ChipMonster · July 2015

Thankfully my husband sounds a lot like yours @vvitchhazel - I don't think there's anything that would turn him away from sex. And I think that sex is my favourite part of being pregnant!

MommaB16 · July 2015

Whoa where are all you ladies getting your drive? Since about 7 weeks it's like my body flipped the switch. Sex itself seems repulsive to me, and hubs wants it so bad. It's been about 5 weeks now and I feel completely awful. But this isn't something I can just do to make him happy... I literally don't want anything to do with, doing it. I want my drive back though! Anyone else not have drive, when they did before?

Emott13 · July 2015

I feel super guilty because I'm nauseous at night (really our only time to do the deed, other than in the AM) and I've been having such insanely vivid sex dreams at night that I wake up feeling like we've done it ten times while I was sleeping. Poor DH. lol

aporcelainface · July 2015

OP, I'm with you, girl. It's not even that mine has an excuse -he just doesn't initiate or seem interested at all. A few weeks ago he said he felt like I never initiated anymore since becoming pregnant, which was true. I felt kind of terrible and bloated and yucky. But now at 15 weeks I'm literally begging for him to touch me and getting zero interest. Like come on, I'm half naked over here.

keshakdavis · July 2015

I wish hubby were here so I could get busy. But, up until about 2 weeks ago I wasn't interested at all. Now I want it all the time but have to take care of myself. Sorry TMI.

wyomama0427 · July 2015

MommaB16 said:
Whoa where are all you ladies getting your drive? Since about 7 weeks it's like my body flipped the switch. Sex itself seems repulsive to me, and hubs wants it so bad. It's been about 5 weeks now and I feel completely awful. But this isn't something I can just do to make him happy... I literally don't want anything to do with, doing it. I want my drive back though! Anyone else not have drive, when they did before?

I totally agree. I finally got my sex drive back a few months after I got my Nexplanon removed. But since about 6 weeks pregnant I haven't even wanted to snuggle the hubbs:( I feel bad because we had an awesome sex life but now i just can't seem to get in the mood. At all. I love him and he's still sexy. We're just in quite a dry spell.

I also have a friend who has a two year old and they haven't had sex in so long her fiancée says she has a dusty old coot lmao so at least we aren't that bad!!

jferrer1212 · July 2015

Wow, so glad I'm not alone. Ftm, and hubby is totally not interested & afraid he will hurt baby. I'm hoping time will help, forcing him or having doc say something or even playfully showing articles that it's ok are not helping. I almost died the other day, when he's like "maybe we'll do it one more time before baby".. .ahhh that's like 6 months from now plus 6 wks doc says to wait. I'll die lol that's insane. I don't know what to do. Glad I don't feel alone here.

BabyRut2015 · July 2015

I'm with you @ChipMonster sex is the only thing I like about being pregnant right now! We have less of it, because of ms, or have opted for daytime sex since I'm sick at night. But everything is extra sensitive and extra responsive, and DH and I are having fun with it!

laxdixdar · July 2015

cyanope said:
Ha. I'm having the opposite problem. DH wants it, I don't. The only time I feel up for sex is during the afternoon, but the H is at work so...
I'm still trying to be a good wife, but it's so hard!! Can't we just eat some skittles and watch Netflix together?? That's intimacy, right??

This is my life. I've caved a few times since we hit 2nd trimester, but only when DH starts seeming desperate. I'd be good with skittles and Netflix.

Flyingtrouble · July 2015

So I realised the other day that the last time we did the deed or anything like it was...... May. No seriously! I'm an awful wife!
Work schedules didn't help, neither did DD, but mainly I'm just not interested!! When we do I'm making shopping lists in my head! No drive AT ALL!

Momona1 · July 2015

DH and I are having sex more now than when we were ttc. It's crazy good sex, too.

emzy86 · July 2015

DH and I used to have sex 3 x a week before the baby... Now it has gone downhill. He has this stupid thing about hurting the baby and I told him to start googling the female anatomy before I kill him because he's being stupid. Since then we are back on track with 3 x week & it better stay that way!!

sarah92544 · July 2015

My hubby LOVES my sex drive at least once a day and like @vvitchhazel no oral really bad gag reflexs but i always want it ALWAYS lol

cameronreed · July 2015

I need to let my SO read all of these comments about us prego women not wanting sex. I tell him I just REALLY don't want to do it and that it is a symptom of pregnancy and he thinks I'm full of shit. I feel bad turning him away, considering he is a 22 year old with the sex drive of a wild animal. Hoping my sex drive returns soon.

aphilli8 · July 2015

Do not want

jesssarge · July 2015

I'm really not wanting sex at all, just really cannot be bothered and that's all my boyfriend wants at the moment!

Everything makes me feel poop! Ready for January to hurry up lol!!

sunnydlight · July 2015

We had amazing sex while trying to conceive. Now I'm to tiered and bloated and not as limber. He understands it'll get better but he's missing the old crazy me a bit.

SisterSunshine · July 2015

Sex problem: I'm horny and I have SCH as well as am currently previa. So my hubs just got an enthusiastic BJ, and I'm left frustrated.

anniyas · July 2015

Also do not want. I feel gross and tired. I have no interest in intimacy right now. I don't even want to kiss more than a peck here and there. My SO is understanding but frustrated. I feel bad, but only a little.

kalahall13 · July 2015

I have had the best sex ever while pregnant.. Granted it's only about 2-3 times a week, but I try. Thank goodness SO is very understanding and completely okay with me saying I don't want to have sex, but when we do it is MINDBLOWING!

aphilli8 · July 2015

kalahall13 said:
it's only about 2-3 times a week, but I try.

Lol at "only"

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