Midwife or OB?

LEAA14 · July 2015

I'm leaning towards OB right now, but am curious about midwives. Have you decided yet? What helped you make the choice? What have your past experiences been like? Does anyone have experience with both? I need more information!

rainbowminion · July 2015

It would be OB for me anyway because I'm in a higher risk category. But even if I wanted a midwife, the closest birth center is an hour away and they were shut down last year for violations, so...

strlitemiss · July 2015

I'm seeing a midwife for a multitude of reasons.

Kiek · July 2015

I had an OB with my daughter. Everyone has a different experience so I can only speak from my own. With that said, a lot of things happened during her birth that I did not care for. I was highly discouraged from moving around during labor. Every time the nurse came in and I was using the exercise ball she made me get back in bed. I was not given any information on what to expect during labor. My OB visits were always rushed and when I had questions it was more of an inconvenience to them. They acted as if GD and blood pressure were things that just happened and never gave information on how to avoid it even when I asked. I also never received a post pardum check up. Again, that was just my experience. Apparently the area I lived in doesn't have a very good reputation.

I'm going to a midwife this time at a birth center. I love her! My visit wasn't rushed. She answered all my questions. When I got to hear the heartbeat she moved the Doppler around soni could also hear how much my LO was moving. She checked my nutrient levels and will do so at every appointment. I need more protein apparently lol. She also has me keep a food diary so she can go over it with me to help me make decisions that will keep me and baby at optimum health. She provides a birth class for me and DH that we are required to attend. She does the first two baby well check ups in our home and brings us a meal the first 24 hours. I was so much more comfortable with her than I ever felt with my first pregnancy. I'm really looking forward to going the midwife route this time.

strlitemiss · July 2015

Ds was born in a hospital via a pain med free induction. The OB was super resistant to me advocating for myself and was annoyed that I wouldn't let her pop my water to speed things along, even though things were progressing nicely. I wanted to move around with my contractions and she kept telling me to hold still which is pretty much impossible. After the 3rd time of the water breaking argument she turned me over to a midwife but unfortunately didn't leave the room. When I was pushing she kept telling me to push out my baby girl even though we'd know for months it was a boy. The midwife was amazing and after a quick conversation about how I wanted the rest of my labor to go she was calm and gentle and let my and my body do the work instead of being all technical about it. I even got to ditch the fetal monitor and I got to move around. This time I'm going to free standing birth center and it will be me and my body doing what I know it can do. No wires , ivs or unnecessary interventions.

SoSweetTea1124 · July 2015

I had to go the OB route with my 1st because I was considered high risk (2 rounds of clomid to conceive), everything else about my pregnancy was 100% normal. The week before my due date my OB asked me if I wanted to schedule an induction, he was going out of town for two weeks starting the day after my due date. I felt pressured to go with the induction even though I wanted a totally natural birth and the risk of C-section goes up astronomically with inductions which freaked me out. The day of my induction the nurses hooked me up to IV's started giving me pain meds without telling me, which caused a horrible reaction and I was throwing up for 3 hours afterward. The nurses kept telling me that I needed to have the baby before 7 PM or they would book me for a CS so I felt tons of pressure to have DS as quickly as possible. I was only in active labor for 4 hours before DS arrived which was awesome and a huge relief that the CS worries were gone. The pitocin didn't really affect me too much, but I have a seriously high pain tolerance. We had to stay 3 nights in the hospital because they wouldn't release the baby until the on call pediatrician could make it to take a look at DS and apparently he had other things to do.

With my midwife the atmosphere is completely different. There is no judgement, no rushing through appointments, they make it completely about the family not just the baby. Once the baby is born the midwife won't rip the baby out of my arms and start poking and prodding him/her. My H gets to deliver my baby, not some team of medical professionals wearing rubber gloves and masks. I get to go home about 4 hours after giving birth. No sterile hospital stays where you are being woken up every 2 hours to check your blood pressure, temperature, and to be asked if you've pooped (for some reason nurses are always asking that!). I am so excited to have this new experience and to bring my baby into the world the way that I want to!. Fx that everything works out exactly how I am hoping. I know we arn't always in control with these things, but I'm hopeful!

PedsIsHardcore · July 2015

I'm high risk so I have an OB. I'm a diabetic and I had a picture perfect induction.
I told my OB what induction meds I would allow. My nurses never gave me medication without telling me what it was before hand. I was able to walk around, use the birthing ball and eat if I wanted to. I had an epidural and I had a catheter. When I felt like pushing they broke my water and turned the pit off because it was starting to stall my labor, we turned the pit back on 30 minutes later and I had a picture perfect uneventful induction. My kiddo was the first baby born to a diabetic that didn't have to go to the NICU for monitoring.
The OB that delivered my DD was trained by my OB where I live now. They listen and always address my concerns. We are going for another induction at 39 weeks that we want to be a vaginal delivery, but since I have health issues anything is possible. Plus I'm a mean patient.

Monkeybutt80 · July 2015

I know everyone's experience is different. But I went with my OB last time and I am going with my OB this time. I have been with her and with her practice for the past 9 years. She understands me, does not rush me through appointments, answers all my questions, and I am comfortable and happy with her. And I trust her medical judgments, but I also know that there is no realistic way to predict what your birth experience will be like. Your wants and needs for the birth experience may not necessarily happen regardless of where, or with whom you birth.

I had a great, healthy pregnancy last time. No complications during it. I gave birth to a healthy boy weighing 8lbs and 11oz, but getting there was scary. He was stuck on his way out. He got stuck, and in a way that was preventing him from getting oxygen. Dr. discussed emergency c section, nurses were calling down to the OR, and I was terrified. Luckily, with a 3rd degree tear and some maneuvering from the doctor, I got him out with the next push. But I know that if that happened away from the hospital and I wasn't able to get him out, he most likely would have been brain dead from lack of oxygen by the time I got to the hospital. This is why I will be going with my OB and going with a hospital.

And I want to add that not all hospitals and nurses are just in the "business of being born". I made sure that the hospital was supportive of me wanting to keep my baby with me after the birth. They put him directly on my belly after birth, waited until the cord stopped pulsing to cut it, and cleaned him up in the room and I spent the next two hours with him in my arms (until I got exhausted and asked them to take him so that I can sleep). The nurses explained everything before they did anything including any meds and were so encouraging and helpful throughout the process. My point is, you can have a good or bad experience at a hospital or at a birthing center/ home birth, and not all hospitals or all birthing centers are the same. Good luck with your decision.

JLaszlo00 · July 2015

Always a midwife unless you are high risk. That's just the way these two specialties are trained, OBs are skilled at high risk and Midwives have mastered natural childbirth. With either one you'll want to make sure they have good references and back up if needed.

lightrox · July 2015

I love my OB that I had for both my boys. We moved a year and a half ago and I really love my new OB office. I've never had an issue with an OB office. I had a Midwife at first with my first son and I had a SCH and was bleeding and she was insensitive and said to me that I'm miscarrying and that I should get over it. She didn't do an ultrasound nothing I was so upset that I got my records that day and left and found my OB who did an ultrasound and saw I had a SCH and put me on pelvic rest for the first trimester. My personal experience I would never go with a midwife but everyone is different.

inomniaparatus · July 2015

Aren't midwives nurses and not m.d.s? I wouldn't be comfortable with that but that's me.

SoSweetTea1124 · July 2015

All midwives have a masters in nursing with a specialization in Midwifery and have many years of training on top of their certifications. All I can recall my OB actually doing at my DS birth was catching him..... Not really sure why a medical degree is even required to do that?

anamilia · July 2015

I have Kaiser, and I can choose OB or midwife - my preference. I will probably go with OB, but it will be because the OB appt schedules are more conducive to my work schedule. I can still choose even with the fact that I am, as many of the PP's, classified as high risk (due to BP issues), becuase midwives and OB's both have privileges at Kaiser hospitals (at least here). But, for my first birth, I didn't make the choice of midwife, because at the time It would've meant traveling to a different facility.

For my first birth, I had an OB at Kaiser and she was very receptive during my pregnancy to a lot of what was mentioned above (moving around, not being stuck in bed, no-meds), but at the end of the day, once I was in the hospital things started progressing in the way that the staff was used to - which was immediate IV, pitocin, asking me if I wanted pain-meds, etc. It wasn't in a bad spirit, it was just their routine, and what most women who birth in a hospital with an OB will end up doing. I had certain goals, and the way I made sure that those goals were met was by 1 - being on the same page with my husband and 2 - I hired a Doula.

I WILL hire a Doula again. I think this is a great compromise if you want or need an OB, but want the feel that a midwife provides. Doula's do not have the certifications that midwifes have (no, midwifes are not "just" nurses) but they have a a plethora of experience in birthing that, unless you come from a family like the Duggars, you probably wont have no matter how many classes you take. When I was 9cm dilated all I wanted to do was push but, of course, I shouldn't've. The doctor on call came and checked me again and said, "yup, still 9 cm" and I wanted to die. But, then my doula asked a question that I never would have though of asking, which was: if I was evenly dilated. It turns out that I wasn't (one half was completely ready, the other side had a cm to go). The doula told me to lie on that side and let the baby's weight do the work. Within minutes, I was fully dilated. I don't know how much longer I would have had to wait without that tip.
Doulas do not make medical decisions, they don't make decisions for you, they are there to know what your wishes are and support those wishes whether its to do it with no-meds and natural, or with a epidural and a c-section. Also, the doula was a HUGE support for my husband because she could coach him on how to help me, where to massage, give him a break when he needed to use the restroom, etc.

The whole Birthing experience can be scary, especially for a FTM. My birthplan did not go the way I expected (I ended up hemorrhaging and after a completely drug-free birth, wound up in emergency surgery) but at the end of the day, I have no regrets. Not one. Because I know that I understood everything that was going on, I didn't feel in the dark or pressured to do something that I didn't want to do. And the Doula was a big part of that.

inomniaparatus · July 2015

SoSweetTea1124 said:
All midwives have a masters in nursing with a specialization in Midwifery and have many years of training on top of their certifications. All I can recall my OB actually doing at my DS birth was catching him..... Not really sure why a medical degree is even required to do that?

Yea I just wouldn't be comfortable not working with a doctor but if you are, go for it.

Miss Lilac · July 2015

After a nursing degree, Midwives do a four year program specialized entirely in pregnancy and birth. Generally, doctors do an undergrad and then four year program that is very generalized but then specialize. I'm not sure I see the difference here to be honest with you.

That said, left to my own devices I'd go with a midwife but I think that would give DH a heart attack. He very specifically wants me at a hospital (which I can respect), so I've found a clinic run by an OB who employs midwives. One of which will be there with the doctor during the birth. Best of both worlds I guess!

strlitemiss · July 2015

Midwives have the same training as

inomniaparatus said:

SoSweetTea1124 said:
All midwives have a masters in nursing with a specialization in Midwifery and have many years of training on top of their certifications. All I can recall my OB actually doing at my DS birth was catching him..... Not really sure why a medical degree is even required to do that?
Yea I just wouldn't be comfortable not working with a doctor but if you are, go for it.

Midwives have just as much if not more training in low risk vaginally delivery then doctors.

g8trkim · July 2015

inomniaparatus said:

Aren't midwives nurses and not m.d.s? I wouldn't be comfortable with that but that's me.

They aren't nurses... otherwise they would call them nurses.

g8trkim · July 2015

I go to a large practice with OBs and MWs. High risk patients only go to the OBs. Otherwise, you see the MWs. Either way, you deliver in a hospital. If you end up having a c-section, the OB performs it and the MW assists.

The practice I used to go to was just OBs. I was happy with them and with my whole experience. However, I will say I've been a little more impressed with the bedside manner of the MWs.

Either way, they are competent medical professionals, but it's all about making the choice that is right for you. Personally, I wouldn't do a home birth or birthing center because I'm just not comfortable with it, but again it's a personal choice.

HBirdie · July 2015

inomniaparatus said:

Aren't midwives nurses and not m.d.s? I wouldn't be comfortable with that but that's me.

Are you for real with this?

strlitemiss · July 2015

Also there's a difference between a C.N.M and C.M.

HBirdie · July 2015

OP: I saw the midwife at my OB's practice for my last pregnancy. It was the best of both worlds- I still birthed at the hospital and could have immediate access to an OB if I wanted/needed one (and I did end up having a c-section so an OB performed it), but I never felt like i needed anything that my midwife couldn't provide. She was amazing. Her appointments were twice as long as the OBs scheduled theirs for, she was patient and answered every question thoughtfully and knowledgeably, and she was gentle and very kind. During labor, she let me do what felt right without pushing me, and she followed up with us several times while we were in the hospital to debrief and talk about the delivery.
This doesn't mean you wouldn't get the same kind of care from an OB, because you definitely might. But I think midwives tend to take more time and care, and their knowledge certainly isn't lacking.
I think the best thing to do is see several providers and decide who you feel most comfortable with.

PedsIsHardcore · July 2015

A doctor has to get a bacholors degree, then they go to medical school for 4 years then they can do an internship and on to residency which is where they receive the training for the specialty they want to be in. Residency usually is 4 years long depending on the program.
Family practice doctors can deliver babies. So some of those residency programs include OB. I had a family practice doctor and the attending at my DD's birth.

A midwife is more than qualified to deliver babies and to be honest, if I was low risk I would have one vs an OB. They usually have an OB they work closely with if things don't go how they should and the mom needs a c-section. It's a continuation of care. Also not all doctors are MD's. My OB is a DO. DO = Doctor of Osteopathics. MD = Medical Doctor. I prefer DO's because they are trained to treat the whole patient, plus my mom is a DO and I just have a better relationship with them. They have the same bacholors degree, 4 years of medical school, then possible internship and then residency.

Just find a health care professional you trust and that you feel has your and your baby's best interests.

g8trkim · July 2015

SoSweetTea1124 said:

All midwives have a masters in nursing with a specialization in Midwifery and have many years of training on top of their certifications. All I can recall my OB actually doing at my DS birth was catching him..... Not really sure why a medical degree is even required to do that?

My nurses did 99% of the work. For my 2nd pregnancy, the OB wasn't even there for the pushing, he just swooped in, caught, and left.

inomniaparatus · July 2015

Miss Lilac said:
After a nursing degree, Midwives do a four year program specialized entirely in pregnancy and birth. Generally, doctors do an undergrad and then four year program that is very generalized but then specialize. I'm not sure I see the difference here to be honest with you.

That said, left to my own devices I'd go with a midwife but I think that would give DH a heart attack. He very specifically wants me at a hospital (which I can respect), so I've found a clinic run by an OB who employs midwives. One of which will be there with the doctor during the birth. Best of both worlds I guess!

I'd imagine it's a lot harder to get into a good med school than a mid-wife program.

Miss Lilac · July 2015

inomniaparatus said:

Miss Lilac said:
After a nursing degree, Midwives do a four year program specialized entirely in pregnancy and birth. Generally, doctors do an undergrad and then four year program that is very generalized but then specialize. I'm not sure I see the difference here to be honest with you.

That said, left to my own devices I'd go with a midwife but I think that would give DH a heart attack. He very specifically wants me at a hospital (which I can respect), so I've found a clinic run by an OB who employs midwives. One of which will be there with the doctor during the birth. Best of both worlds I guess!
I'd imagine it's a lot harder to get into a good med school than a mid-wife program.

Well if you imagine so then you must be right! They probably let just any Tom, Dick, or Harry be a midwife.

g8trkim · July 2015

inomniaparatus said:

After a nursing degree, Midwives do a four year program specialized entirely in pregnancy and birth. Generally, doctors do an undergrad and then four year program that is very generalized but then specialize. I'm not sure I see the difference here to be honest with you. That said, left to my own devices I'd go with a midwife but I think that would give DH a heart attack. He very specifically wants me at a hospital (which I can respect), so I've found a clinic run by an OB who employs midwives. One of which will be there with the doctor during the birth. Best of both worlds I guess!
I'd imagine it's a lot harder to get into a good med school than a mid-wife program.

inomniaparatus · July 2015

Hey if you're comfortable with it, go for it. Just not for me

I don't want to argue what's clearly obvious. Not worth it

strlitemiss · July 2015

inomniaparatus said:
Hey if you're comfortable with it, go for it. Just not for me I don't want to argue what's clearly obvious. Not worth it

It's just very clear you have no idea what your going on and on about.

Miss Lilac · July 2015

^^^ Yeah. That's about the only obvious thing going on here.

salixjoy38 · July 2015

For people unfamiliar with midwives maybe it seems crazy but it's pretty standard pregnancy/delivery care all over the world. We are going with a midwife, if something comes up that is beyond their scope of care during the pregnancy or if there are complications during delivery there will be a transfer to an OB, which is how it goes most places. In my province they are certified medical professions and the midwifery school is VERY hard to get into. I think the system is really great if it allows the OBs to be freed up for these cases that really need them, and let birthing experts take care of the more typical cases. It seems pretty 50/50 in my social circle for people who use OBs vs midwives but since the system is pretty established there aren't harsh judgements either way

strlitemiss · July 2015

Op of you don't think you're going to have a pain medicine free birth you will need an OB anyway.

salixjoy38 · July 2015

strlitemiss said:

Op of you don't think you're going to have a pain medicine free birth you will need an OB anyway.

That might vary between hospitals/midwives because since I'm going to be in the hospital I will have access to pain mess even with my midwife

HBirdie · July 2015

inomniaparatus said:
Hey if you're comfortable with it, go for it. Just not for me I don't want to argue what's clearly obvious. Not worth it

You sure are a special snowflake, aren't you.

FTR, it's a misconception that you have to want a natural, med-free birth to use a MW. I was fairly certain from the beginning that I wanted an epidural and mine was completely fine with that.

In my experience and understanding from friends' experiences, an OB will come in and check you very occasionally, and come toward the end of labor to actually catch the baby. The nurses do at least 95% of the work. My midwife, on the other hand, was present in the room with me so much during my 36 hours of labor. I felt very close to her by the end of pregnancy because her care was spectacular and so thorough. She truly cared about me (and baby) as whole persons. I wasn't just another pregnancy to her.

strlitemiss · July 2015

Op of you don't think you're going to have a pain medicine free birth you will need an OB anyway.

Salixjoy38 said:

strlitemiss said:

Op of you don't think you're going to have a pain medicine free birth you will need an OB anyway.

That might vary between hospitals/midwives because since I'm going to be in the hospital I will have access to pain mess even with my midwife

Quote tree fail
Most Hospital midwives are CMNs not CM there is a bit of difference. I agree.

thoughtfulmommy · July 2015

Similar to @kiek I had an OB last time and will go with a midwife this time. I loved my OB and didn't think my apptointments were too short but when I was in labour my OB wasn't even in the floor. I spent 40% of the time with nurses and the rest alone with DH in the hospital room labouring. The in call doc came in to determine I needed a c section and performed it.

My plan is the deliver in a hospital but with my midwife this time. I can have pain meds, med free, move around, stay in the bed, etc. My midwife will be there the whole time and is more supportive of what is beneficial to me during labour and delivery.

minivanmafia · July 2015

I found a midwife that I LOVED but she left the practice and went to work for another hospital part time. I then found myself a new OB that I absolutely love at a different office. He delivered my youngest and will deliver this one. He is very personable. I agree that he is only there about a total of 30 minutes through out labor and you really have to get to know and bond with the nurses on the L&D floor. I have had great experiences with mine and look forward to this delivery as well as I am glad that I found and trust a great OB. However, if that certain midwife would have opened her own office or went to another I would have been her first patient.

g8trkim · July 2015

strlitemiss said:
Op of you don't think you're going to have a pain medicine free birth you will need an OB anyway.

I think this varies. I will deliver at a hospital by a midwife and can have pain meds.

salixjoy38 · July 2015

strlitemiss said:

Op of you don't think you're going to have a pain medicine free birth you will need an OB anyway.

strlitemiss said:

Op of you don't think you're going to have a pain medicine free birth you will need an OB anyway.

That might vary between hospitals/midwives because since I'm going to be in the hospital I will have access to pain mess even with my midwife
Quote tree fail Most Hospital midwives are CMNs not CM there is a bit of difference. I agree.

I'm in Canada so we don't have nurse midwives, that I know of. Ours for the most part have hospital admitting privileges if you want a hospital birth or need to be transferred. I don't know anything about the nurse midwife/midwife differences

LEAA14 · July 2015

Wow thanks for all the responses! The office I've been going to for the last 8 years has both, and you deliver at the hospital either way. When I made my next appointment I told the receptionist I still wasn't sure which I wanted to go with, so she put me with one of the midwives since that matched up with the time that worked best for me. I'm going to do a little more research between now and then, but I'm now thinking that a midwife might be a better fit for my pregnancy. Thanks again for all the replies and personal stories! It's really helpful for FTMs like me to get info from people with a range of experiences.

wisco29 · July 2015

Had an ob, she wasn't even the one on call when j went into labor and the person who was still saw patients between coming to check on me. I saw nurses the whole time like pp said... She came for some of the pushing and then to say I needed an emergency c section. Then she left and I saw nurses the rest of my stay

I've never worked with a midwife before so I don't have any insight

Good luck and remember you can usually switch if you don't like who you have

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