Going back to work

ccarrozza1 · July 2015

When did you all decide to go back to work? how many weeks was your baby? Did you get a nanny or use daycare?

NLewis1 · July 2015

I did t really have a choice of when I went back. I went back when my son was 6 weeks old. My employer paid my salary 100% for 6 weeks, and I could have taken up to 12 with FMLA, but financially it wasn't really an option. I do think I actually enjoyed going back to work, but I think for me, ideally, I would have gone back at 8 weeks. I did a nanny share and we took him to her house. I liked as he got older he had a couple other kids to play with. She stopped though because she was expecting her 2nd baby, so we got a regular nanny in our home. It was a disaster. We had some small issues with the nanny share gal (mostly the texting me at 5 am saying her son was sick, so I had to find alternative childcare at the last minute - this happened quite a bit over the 9 months she had my son) the new gal was just too young, and wouldn't take direction or follow the routine I laid out for her

This last week was the only week she nannied for us and my son started waking up in the middle of the night and I could not figure out why - turns out she was only giving him 2, 4 ounce bottles during the day, so he was waking up starving! She quit on Wednesday because her husband was transferred to a different state and it was a huge blessing in disguise that I had to figure out new childcare so fast - I would have hated to have had the conversation about how I didn't like anything she did and she wasn't feeding my kid enough during the day.

I ended up (by the grace of God) snagging a spot for him at a very good daycare close to our home! I am so excited that unless it's my kid that is sick, I will always have childcare, they have a very good routine and follow strict cleanliness policies. And it's comparable in price to what I was paying for a nanny.

ccarrozza1 · July 2015

Yeah, that's why I am nervous about finding a babysitter or nanny...at a daycare they have lots of people and a protocol. Problem is no one in my area can recommend me a good daycare because there aren't many transplants on the island. It's mostly still people that grew up here so their whole families live nearby to help. I have no family here to help and my husband's salary is not enough to support us. It's expensive living in NY and we have to pay mortgage etc. I just don't know what to do!

ccarrozza1 · July 2015

By the way I can't believe that woman only gave her two small bottles all day. That makes me sick to my stomach!!!!!

NLewis1 · July 2015

I was extremely upset when I realized it, and was furious with myself that it took several days for me to figure it out. My son is a pretty good eater too! I would just go and do tours of each daycare and speak with the care takers since you can't get a recommendation

SharonB222 · July 2015

Since you asked "weeks" my response may be out of your range. IF/RPL made me AMA (old, financially stable) - sleep deprivation and everything takes more of a physical toll. If I were 10 years younger I might have gone back quickly and FT, but pro/con I am not. I took 4 mos LOA and went back reduced FT. The day I was requesting LOA at work a returning "elder" mom recommended 4 mos LOA and said my VP would approve it. She had tried 3 mo (too short), 4 mo (perfect) and 5 mo (too long). For me 4 mos was great and I did that twice (necessary the 1st time, nice the 2nd time). When I returned my boss (a single dad) suggested reduced FT and I agreed. So glad.

For care, with #1 my mom helped 1st few weeks, then a temporary nanny, then a PT in-home care - two other babies. With #2 my mom helped 1st few weeks, then a temporary nanny-share stood us up, so we found a PT in-home care - lots of other kids (#2 was sick constantly - and now that he's a toddler we moved him to #1's in-home care).

Congrats on your babe!

WillyBean · July 2015

I went back to work after 12 weeks. We could not afford daycare for our twins because of my husbands rotating schedule. Luckily, we have a nanny 3 days per week and she is awesome. The other two days, the kiddos are watched by their grandmothers. That works out nicely for all! If we didn't luck out with this scenario, I think we would have tried to find a nanny share. I do wish my twins had more kiddos to play with, so I try to schedule play dates for them. Always trade-offs with these kinds of things! You will find what works best for your family!

ccarrozza1 · July 2015

If I can afford it, I would like to wait till 4-5 months but the issue is I don't know if we can afford it....

Wish it didn't have to be this way

Perfect Sonnet · July 2015

I am always in the minority with these types of questions. I would go nuts if I took 4-5 months off. I will take 12 weeks away from the office, but will be doing a lot of work from home during that time. After 12 weeks, I will start working fulltime again, but only going into the office like 2 days a week.

With my first I went back to work after 7 weeks because I didn't have a choice, and it was really difficult. I am happy I have a lot more flexibility this time.

ccarrozza1 · July 2015

Well, I am sort of half and half about it. I want what's best for my baby but at the same time being at home all the time and not have work socialization and structure makes me nutty. It is more the social aspect of work and regime that I miss...not the commute or actual work. I can do work from home if that's the case but taking care of a young baby is also a full-time job...

acorby · July 2015

I went back to work after 9 (unpaid) weeks. It was brutal - they change so fast, I felt like I was missing so much. We used a nanny so they could be in our home not a center. In thinking about #2 I'll hopefully be able to be home a bit longer?

SLGILL1978 · July 2015

I went back to work when my daughter was 10 weeks. I work for the school district and originally I was going to stay home until August when my daughter would be 6 months, but my boss was deathly afraid I was never coming back. So I compromised (plus had a c section). There was only six weeks left of school until summer.
We originally went with a daycare center because there were no in homes available. I actually had a great experience but the price was a huge turn off. When I returned to work in August, my daughter started at an in home. I looked for a babysitter that closely resembles my parenting style.
Returning to work, I never missed any firsts with my daughter. I also was able to get them all on video for my husband (he's military) and our other family members.

Going back to work

Re: Going back to work

Mrs. H

Crohn's Dx: August 2008

Endometriosis Dx: May 2010

Married: 05/19/2012

TTC #1: June 2013

BFP: December 2013

DS: Born 08/29/2014

TTC #2: July 2015