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December 2015 Moms
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Co-ed baby shower?

groovylocksgroovylocks member
edited July 2015 in December 2015 Moms
My dear coworker and friend is throwing our baby shower for us. Sometime around mid-late october/early november. 

My husband and I are both people of the "few close friends" variety and as a result, are considering making it co-ed to increase volume a little as we want to make this a real PARTY, we so rarely have real ones. We realize this is non-traditional. We are also non-traditional so if your only objection is tradition for its own sake, we find that silly, pointless and probably won't care. 

My concerns fall more into these two categories:
  • How does one throw a baby shower that interests both genders? (We have already thought of BBQ and Cards Against Humanity)
  • Are there any ACTUAL concerns to consider that we might not have thought of? (Again, "It's not traditional" and "But what will people think?" are not concerns)
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Re: Co-ed baby shower?

  • ammnam14ammnam14 member
    I've been to a few co-ed showers and they still played the regular shower games. The guys were VERY into it and everyone had a blast. :) One shower was co-ed but was at someone's house. So the men went out back and played horseshoe and drank while the women did the whole shower thing. It was kind of like a diaper party and baby shower mixed into one.
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  • groovylocksgroovylocks member
    AudriannaMaria said:
    I've been to a few co-ed showers and they still played the regular shower games. The guys were VERY into it and everyone had a blast. :) One shower was co-ed but was at someone's house. So the men went out back and played horseshoe and drank while the women did the whole shower thing. It was kind of like a diaper party and baby shower mixed into one.
    Hey good idea! I'm going to try to score a cottage or something somewhere so we can do exactly that. I want us to BBQ and do all that fun stuff so I'll rent the place and make sure they have horseshoes!
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  • groovylocksgroovylocks member
    TomekiaB said:
    As a woman who doesn't "love" baby showers, I like co-ed showers (it took 2 to make the baby...). I really dislike the attitude that wedding gifts and baby gifts are for women (it isn't like the bride or mom are the only ones using the gifts, most men enjoy eating etc.). 

    You will get more inappropriate comments from men in attendence about "where babies come from" and weight at a co-ed shower, so if that makes you too uncomfortable this may not be the best option for you. There was also alcohol...which kind of weirds me out when the guest of honor can't drink.

    My favorite baby shower was co-ed BBQ shower about a month ago. It was my favorite because watching my DH and other guys not understand what a diaper genie did etc was far more entertaining than traditional shower games! If you have enough guys that aren't experienced with kids some kind of game where they have to figure out how a baby item is used could be REALLY funny (maybe a battle of the sexes format?). I've seen them make Dad put a diaper and clothes on a doll blind folded which was pretty funny too.
    I don't have zero tolerance on alcohol and will likely have one beer or glass of wine during the shower. I also don't mind people drinking around me when i'm not. So that's no big deal. 

    Weight and sex jokes are likely not a huge issue since some of these men work with me and are likely (not for sure, but likely) to keep their dignity and mine intact :)

    But yes, things to think about for sure.

    I love your game suggestions too!
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  • mrs14678mrs14678 member
    We are planning to do a co-ed shower too. Some dear friends of ours had one for their rainbow baby. The couples moms facilitated the guestbook and greetings, then immediately by the entrance was a drink station (soda, punch, no alcohol since it was in a church classroom), then veggies and cupcakes. There was a table for presents. After about 15-20 min of visiting, the moms gathered everyone together and prayed over the couple and their baby, thanked everyone for coming, told a quick story, then the couple opened presents. After that, there was a little more visiting (10min-ish), and everyone started leaving. There weren't games or awkward stories because the moms managed everyone so well. It was fun, baby focused, and comfortable for all present. :)

    Can you tell I'm not a huge fan of some traditional shower things? Haha!
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  • TomekiaBTomekiaB member
    The alcohol only made me feel slightly uncomfortable because the mom would normally LOVE to have a drink but felt that she couldn't. The research seems to support that a single serving of alcohol is not dangerous but it is such a taboo very few moms seem comfortable considering a drink whether it is because of fear of judgement or actual fear of harm to LO. 

    You strike me as the type that can handle a joke too by the way :)

    There was a great thread the other day about Halloween Showers that got into general fall showers. Some were doing apple orchard like activities (hayrides, carmel apples etc.) which would be fun, you could do a bonfire afterwards if you like outdoorsy things. There were fun pinterest party ideas with pumpkin/fall themed showers too! I think you could plan any party that would be normal among your friends and put a "baby shower twist" on it (game night, dinner party etc.).


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  • chewie5990chewie5990 member
    We are planning a coed shower...I don't really have many female friends and would much rather have a fun BBQ party with all our friends and my DH. My sister in law is planning it so not sure if she's going to do games or things like that but we just want to hangout and have fun with all our friends and family. I don't think there's anything you need to worry about coed showers are becoming more and more popular.
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  • amw2133amw2133 member
    We are having a Co Ed shower as well that may or may not be at a bar. Haha Hubby works at a bar so it might be the easiest option either way there will be alcohol. I think they can be super fun. I'm not a huge fan of baby shower games in general but I went to one where you had to sing a song with the word baby in it and it was pretty awesome especially because a bunch of the guys got really into it and added dance moves to their song.
    Random question: if you do a Co Ed shower do you still have to open the presents in front of everyone? I feel like the guys would get bored plus I HATED doing this at my bridal shower because I'm not a center of attention kind of person.
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  • TomekiaBTomekiaB member
    @amw2133 Not sure why you have to open presents but google seems to confirm you are supposed too. The co-ed party gift opening was more fun because the guys were pretty vocal about wanting to know what items were and their confusion about things like diaper genies made it funny. Guys gifts were a hit too, my DH gave the baby a manly onsie based on an achievement my DH and dad-to-be shared, which was significantly more exciting than our gift off the registry. I am sure the guys will get some thoughtful or funny gifts. If you don't like opening gifts let your hubby do it and just sit next to him and oh & ah :)

    This list is funny:
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  • kateganclakategancla member
    I want to come to your shower, @groovylocks! If we have a shower it will be co-ed. All of our wedding showers were, as I am not a shower, open gifts in front of people type of girl. DH is.

    And I personally hate shower games of any type, so Cards Against Humanity is something I could get behind!
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  • khamilton2621khamilton2621 member
    The one co-Ed shower I have been to the males participated in a diaper shower. So couples brought two gifts, one from the female and diapers from the males. The guys liked it!
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  • jutondreaujutondreau member

    We, too, are having a co-ed shower/PARTY hosted by my parents and my in-laws!  I can't wait...and DH is stoked.  There WILL BE drinking and probably some games (I'm not sure about the games since I'm not involved in it besides providing a partial guest list and approving of the date).  I think it's a GREAT idea!  As PP stated, it takes two to make 'em...;-)

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  • redfallonredfallon member
    I don't know why a co-ed baby shower would be a big deal? DH was the one who wrote down all the gifts and who they came from in the baby book at ours. We didn't do any games because I hate those. Ours was more like a party with cake and presents. We had it at his mom's house.

    I had one for my side of the family, too, that I traveled to and he couldn't come because of work. That one didn't have any men at it, but it wasn't any different than the one at his mom's house.

    Jamie


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  • SCKDSCKD member
    We had a coed shower with our first. It was a blast! Had a game where it was a contest to chug beer out of a baby bottle. Haha! There were also a few other baby shower games, but everyone had fun getting into it. We were the first in our group of friends to have a baby though, and I'm sure everyone now is getting tired of the constant showers. I would love to do a coed for this one, but I have so many friends who have had babies recently, and they all did the traditional girls only party.
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  • Athomas1341Athomas1341 member
    edited July 2015
    We did a co-Ed shower for our first also- it was so much fun!!!! I would highly recommend. We had it catered by a BBQ company and had lots of alcohol. Pretty much made it into a party with the bonus of baby stuff :) We played some games too- like the guys had to drink beer out of a baby bottle (just like PP said) and whoever won got a handle of vodka (of course you could pick whatever gift you want!) that was the only game we had for the guys though

    Yes... Sucks you can't drink but you can make some delicious mock tails!
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  • breezypipbreezypip member
    I really would love a Co-Ed as well. DH and I are also a "few good friends" type of couple, so my own shower might be small and awkward. I also dislike being the center of attention and am not stuck to convention. I think I'll have to swing this idea past DH and my mother. I'd love to do a BBQ/party type of shower that is more low key, and I'm glad to hear this wouldn't be looked at as strange by most people.
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  • CanDGrrlCanDGrrl member
    These are your friends. I think they'd enjoy anything you do. I know I'd especially enjoy the BBQ  :D  haha.  Friends just want to enjoy you and your happiness with you.  Allowing someone to be part of that is a special time!  Congrats and good luck!

    ~Candie~ with an -IE

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  • VesperLoveVesperLove member
    My Dh is super bummed that traditional showers are usually women only. His stance is that it's his baby too and he wants to celebrate! We are likely having two showers because of it. My sister wants to throw a traditional women's shower and there are enough ladies in my life to make that work. Then, we are having a Baby BBQ with a few couples that we are pretty close with who all seem to do the co-ed shower thing (they've had kids in the last few years). We may play a couple games but it will really just be a get together. The women at that one will not attend the other one (as I'm sure they'd prefer anyway!). 

    I think they're super fun. My only recommendation is to keep the games lively and things the guys will be interested in. AKA, don't do the whole "measure mommy's tummy" etc. There are tons of games they could be into. 
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  • xrumxrum member
    i also vote for co-ed, way more fun! 
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  • dp1320dp1320 member

    We had 2 showers for DS... my family threw me one back home that was a "traditional" shower with all women, games, etc. DH's family threw a co-ed one for us and it was really laid back, just food, hanging out, opening gifts - both were fun! I did enjoy having DH there for gift opening though - that's always the worst part for me!

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  • fashiongirlstephfashiongirlsteph member
    edited July 2015
    We are having (2) co-ed showers.

    One in AZ next month where both of our family lives and one home in San Francisco w/ all our friends.

    I've personally never been a huge fan of the 'girls only' shower so this is perfect for us!  For me, it's more about spending time and enjoying these moments with our family and friends.


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  • fmragliofmraglio member
    I just recently went to a co-ed shower for one of my coworkers and had a blast!! I usually hate showers as I find them awkward but DH and I left this one talking about it for days.

    We recently moved and we've found that down here co-ed "Baby-Q" parties are fairly common.

    The one we just went to had karaoke, lots of food, beer for the guys (they had to bring a pack of diapers to get access to the beer- I thought that was cute) and there were a few traditional shower games. They also had cornhole set up where the person who lost had to wear a bib and depends for the rest of the party. The guys got a huge kick out of it and a lot of them ended up doing it for fun as a group picture. So mature ;)
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  • FaithHopeMiracleFaithHopeMiracle member
    I love Jack & Jill showers because I believe when both parents are together and involved it is a celebration of the life they've created, not just some girlie thing to do. My husband loves to.see me happy so he'd always want to be there. But moreover this is a huge thing that we are having a baby and all of his friends and family want to show us their love and support. TTradition has zero to do with it. :-)
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  • faith12112015faith12112015 member
    I'm not sure who is throwing our shower yet but have thrown out ideas to our moms who asked what I wanted. Co-Ed all the way. I actually think gift opening can go faster if we alternate opening them. And there will be booze and food - two most important parts of any party.
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  • redfallonredfallon member
    @faith12112015 said:
    I'm not sure who is throwing our shower yet but have thrown out ideas to our moms who asked what I wanted. Co-Ed all the way. I actually think gift opening can go faster if we alternate opening them. And there will be booze and food - two most important parts of any party.
    And cake! Must have cake <:-P =P~

    Jamie


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  • Sunny2015Sunny2015 member
    I'm having a co ed shower as well! I feel it'll be a lot more comfortable, pintrest has some great ideas on games and invites :)
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  • groovylocksgroovylocks member
    Oh wow you guys, so many awesome replies! I'm constipated and my butt hurts so i'm going to bed now but i can't wait to read through all of these tomorrow after work!
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  • Sunny2015Sunny2015 member
    groovylocks said:

    Oh wow you guys, so many awesome replies! I'm constipated and my butt hurts so i'm going to bed now but i can't wait to read through all of these tomorrow after work!

    Ugh that sucks. I was constipated for a week and literally tried everything so I took my mom's advice and used an enama, it was the only thing that worked for me
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