SO is the "almighty" rant

AbcRizner · July 2015

I dont know how many of you have had to deal with it, but after our LO was born (july 2nd) I cant seem to do anything to make this guy happy. No matter the amount of house work that is done (the stuff that should and shouldnt be done) on top of taking care of a nearly 4yr old I apparently dont do anything. And just because he is outside working all day it has pretty much made him the almighty freaking ruler. My home life between every other hour bottles, a jealous 4 yr old, housework and a couple pets is the amount of doing nothing. He pretty much accuses me of sleeping all day and saying that ive got it cush in comparison to him. Which in sense, yeah he's right. Im not doing physical labor the way he does, but does that mean i get to be belittled? He did this same stuff while i was working a job that wouldn't allow me to have so much as a sit down break at 8 1/2 months pregnant. All ive been able to gather through our arguements is that he is superior to me and anything I do because i dont work physical labor and pull an 11 hour shift, and I turn into the bad guy when i ask if he'd like to hold the baby after he has had a chance to shower, sot down, eat and space out on the television for at least a half hour. Am i alone? Heck. Just this morning he got pissed at me because i asked him to get up with her (first time i have and she is now a week old) and thats where it all even started. He even said that he didnt believe that i got up in the middle of the night to feed her. Cause its worth lying about feeding a kid in the middle of the night when they wake up. Wtf does he think im gonna do? I ignore a shreiking newborn?
Super fustrated mama

crf4 · July 2015

Well fuck all that noise. Your husband is being an asshole, I would not allow him to have a pity party for having a job and supporting his family. Sounds like he needs to man up and show some appreciation for you. I'm sorry you're dealing with all of this, that is so difficult to take anytime but in the early weeks with a newborn you need him to be a better support.

megmansell · July 2015

Uh ... You gave birth 8 days ago???!!! Put your feet up and tell him to get a fucking grip!

shanasheppard · July 2015

Seriously! Tell him to get a grip!...if he was recovering from a "procedure", he would expect you to baby him & help him, why should you expect any different?
If he can't get his crap together, call in help. Have the house full of moms, sisters, friends, etc. to help you get what you need, plus help with chores. I'd like to see him come at a group of women the way he has with you. They will also a good protection for you

MEXARAB · July 2015

Oh hell no! I'm sorry he's being an a$$! I really don't know what to tell you other than to tell him off!

babydoll1008 · July 2015

Staying at home mom is NOT eating bons bons and sleeping all day. It's tough work!!! If my husband said that to me, he would be sleeping on the couch.

ashleytiff · July 2015

Mental exhaustion is just as bad as physical...if not worse.

sarahsairsair · July 2015

Uh-huh if my husband pulled this crap... He better sleep with one eye open

Mjstine · July 2015

I am so sorry you are not receiving support. You are amazing and strong for what you have done. So much so that he can't even possibly go through what you have been through. Don't let youself be put down for that! No woman should have to deal with emotional instability from the person she loves in an already emotionally rocky time.

If my husbad pulled those punches he would be in the dog house big time. I hope you have a strong support network elsewhere you can rely on. Best of luck to you mommy!

leannef88 · July 2015

That is so totally out of order. I would say right on your day off you can take full charge of the kids if you want reassurance of what I have to do everyday..... I would nip his attitude in the bud now before it gets worse. Are you spending time together at all just you and him? Does he have a jealous streak? He maybe feeling insecure about your relationship now all your time is devoted to taking care of the little ones...just a thought. Hope it improves xxx

ChristyM87 · July 2015

You need to sit down and talk to him. If you are not getting some rest it will just prolong your post partum recovery. Was he like this after your first baby?

MrsJIsbell · July 2015

I read your post last night and it made me so mad for you I couldn't even respond.....
What a jerk he is!!! I agree with the other ladies you need to put a stop to this except I'm not sure how, if he's so dense he can't even sympathize with what you've just gone through and see what you have to do everyday, how will he understand???

You do need to let him know that he is only fulfilling his obligation by working to provide for his family, sorry hun, nobody hands out awards for not being a deadbeat!

SBbabyonboard · July 2015

Ugh! Just disrespectful! Maybe can you get your mom or sister or strong female friend to come over for a few days and let them know the deal, that way she can throw in the comments about how strong you are, and how they don't know how you do so well with being at home alone with a toddler and a newborn! If my hubby ever did this I wouldn't know how to forgive him. You've gone through so much and this is the last thing you need to be dealing with. Good luck to you and make sure you stand up for yourself!

princessfireball · July 2015

Ask him if he would like to do what you do for the weekend and let's see how much shit he'll be talking

mnj05 · July 2015

With our first, my husband acted similar but it was a couple of months after giving birth. I finally told him it's not easy staying home and my exhaustion is just as real as his. Come to find out, he was just upset I wasn't always in my happiest mood and greeting him with a cheerful hello when he walked through the door. I almost laughed in his face but told him I'd work on that....after spending all day with a fussy baby.

Men don't get it but that doesn't mean you should be treated that way.

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